To ask what's it like from 2-3 kids

[snackarella]

Trying to decide wether to go from 2 dc (aged 18 months and 3.5yr) to 3.
I have struggled with 1-2 but they are both so lovely and I'm just coming out the hard times as the 18m becomes more independent etc.

I'm a sahm so work isn't a factor, although I have started some freelancing recently.

Does anyone have any advice or experience they can share? All my friends have stopped at 2!

I honestly found the jump from 2-3 harder than from 1-2. I had DS1, then a 6 year gap, then DD and DS2 inside 11 months.

I'm the other way round. Had DD1 and DS within 12 months then DD2 when the other two were 2 and 3. Going from two to three kids in a practical day to day sense...no dramas. Things like cars, holidays, hotel rooms, everything is tailored to.families of 4.

I have three, and they are now 8, 6 and almost 3. The first year was really easy as baby just came along with us and sat and smiled or slept. Age one to very recently was extremely hard work, and I found it quite challenging, especially as the oldest and youngest wanted and needed such different things and going to all the activities with three was hard and I was so so exhausted. The age gap has closed up now and they all get on really well, and enjoy the same things. I feel like three was just right for us after a bumpy bit in the middle. It was much harder than I imagined though, but I really enjoyed the baby stage third time round.

I found 2-3 nearly killed me off because my third had undiagnosed silent reflux and cried the entire first year of her life. She’s amazing now and I’d have another had I not had my tubes tied.

Oh god such mixed reviews!
I just don't know what to do.
I'd love 3 kids long term but baby stage worries me - mine tend not to sleep and I breastfeed so it's really intensive! I'm so stuck!

Things like cars, holidays, hotel rooms, everything is tailored to.families of 4.

This is absolutely true, right down to deals in the supermarket!

I found 2-3 easier than 1-2. Mine are currently 5, 3 and 1. I love having 3.....but now I want another!

See I haven’t found huge issues with holidays etc not catering to families of 5, but there’s a 10.5 yr gap between my eldest and my Youngest

Do many cars take 3 car seats???

1 to 2 was a bit extreme, 2 to 3 he filled the space of the missing person. I breastfeed each of them for a year and they were all atrocious sleepers too.

They are now 3,5&7 and have always got along great.

DC3 is an absolute lunatic though 🤷‍♀️

@CheshireDing that's nice to hear. I'm worried I've had a glimpse of getting my life back and now I'm going to give it up again for another year and 9 months!

I found 1-2 was quite easy. 2-3 has been the undoing of me. The first year was awful, I felt over stretched out of control, hormonal and tired. The second year has been a bit easier, but everything is more difficult.

1-2 was fine. 2-3 was awful.

I love him to bits, but if I knew 3 years ago what I know now I would have stopped at 2.

What are your pregnancies like? I've just had DC3, DC1 is 4.5 and DC 2.5. I can't comment on what it's like having 3 yet, but being pregnant with 2 existing DC was a lot harder than being pregnant with only 1. The pregnancy was also harder in itself - not uncommon from people with 3 DC I've spoken to.

I found 1-2 fine, 2-3 really really hard work I don't even know how I came out the other end of that... then I had a 4th and that's been fine. So yeah 2-3 really difficult... wouldn't wanna repeat it 🤣

I found 1-2 fine and then 2-3 really hard. I think it depends on the baby - DC2 was a great sleeper and an easy baby, while DC3 was a terrible sleeper and a very 'determined' toddler!

1-2 meh okay
2-3 absolute doddle.
The youngest is almost 1. The smallest age gap is 18 months piece of cake!
I'm pregnant with my 4th so shall see how it plays out!
I also have horrendous pregnancies (HG which I am hospitalized for, dangerously low iron, need for growth scans, at risk of blood clots so I am currently on clexane, sciatica - you name it!!)

I would go for it if you have a Nanny or Grandparents to help but otherwise no. We have 3, age 9,6,3. It’s very hard to find activities they all enjoy and we carve it up to enable this so DH and I never get time to ourselves or with each other. I also do 3 school runs - Preschool, infant, junior, that in itself takes 2hrs a day if I walk even though the 3 sites are not that far apart. My youngest didn’t sleep through until he was 2.5yrs and he has health issues so I am forever making hospital visits (whilst struggling to have the other 2 looked after or DH trying to make himself suddenly available from work). Logistically it is very challenging and I have aged very badly these last few years, although I am over 40.

I had twins first and then another 4.5 years later. The first 2 were dream babies, an absolute breeze! The third wasn’t! That was really hard, and it almost broke me when one twin asked me if we could have a day out “without the baby”

Now they’re 11 and 7 it is much easier. But holidays/cars are trickier. We tend to go on self catering UK holidays but we know need 3 bedrooms instead of 2. In terms of cars we only had a few years of 3 car seats. You’re looking at big fat mummy-bus cars... has to be the wider ones like a Ford S-Max, Citroen C4 Grand Picasso, Seat Alhambra, Land Rover Discovery.
Also echo what PP said - deals in supermarkets, cinema, days out etc are all geared towards a family of 4.

I went from two to four by having twins for my third pregnancy but I can honestly say despite the shock of twins going from one to two was the hardest adjustment

0-1 was the worst, they got easier from there on in. Not too sure how we will finance their degree ambitions!

At 18m and 3 you're still in the easy bit imo.
I actually found 0-1 so hard and 1-2 a breeze. Haven't got 3rd, but I am 1 of 3 and I know it can be hard in lots of ways, bedroom space, cars, holidays, you simply don't have enough hands sometimes and as the eldest I was second mum to the youngest and there's only a 6 year age gap.

2-3 was fine and I had to pump as 3 was born with a cleft palate. 3 to 4 has been ok too. 1 to 2 was the worst, but not as bad as 0 to 1! Bigger car, higher expenses or lower standards!

Mine are quite spread out so older two were 7.5 and 4.5 when youngest was born. I found 1 to 2 a breeze but this was because DC2 was and is an easy child (slept, fed well, played independently from early on) and DC1 was 3 and potty trained etc. DC3 ..... OMG. I adore him and I love busyness and bustle of 3 but DC3 has been by far my most difficult child and sometimes I have felt saddened that the older have had much less of my time and attention. Would I do it again, yes. Would my older two prefer to be just a twosome......sometimes.

I found 1-2 the hardest, by 2-3 you are already used to juggling things about & trying to fit in different meal/feed times! Practically things are more designed for 2 kids, like cars & holidays but nothing impossible to handle! I had 3 within 4 years & youngest nearly one now & have so far survived!