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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Selling my mum's house for care home fees.

78 replies

Yarisalpaca · 31/07/2019 17:52

My mum is unable to live in her house anymore so it has to be sold to pay her fees at care home. She is in a very good home and happy there, she has dementia.

The house has been on the market for 3 days for £210,000 and already has 2 offers. The best offer is £204,000 which the estate agent thinks is good.

That offer is subject to us agreeing to remove the house from anymore viewings. Is that normal but I find I feel annoyed at this and I haven't a clue why because the house needs to be sold!

How would anyone else feel about this?

OP posts:

BloomingHydrangea · 31/07/2019 17:55

Can you rent it to cover costs?

BackOnceAgainWithABurnerEmail · 31/07/2019 17:55

Totally normal because I’d you have other people view it what you’re inviting is a bidding war and quite reasonably ppl have no interest in that. You need to accept the offer or say it’s not enough - you can’t have your cake and eat it.

Lazypuppy · 31/07/2019 17:55

Yes standard for property to be removed from sale if you accept an offer.

A house is only worth what someone is willing to pay for it.

BackOnceAgainWithABurnerEmail · 31/07/2019 17:56

I’d = if

BloomingHydrangea · 31/07/2019 17:56

With 2 offers can you get them to go head to head?

Last and final sealed offers by XX date?

endofthelinefinally · 31/07/2019 17:56

Well that doesn't seem fair to me, but I know so many people who have been gazumped that I can understand it. What is the agent's explanation?
You do need to get the best price you can because at around £1000 a week care home fees it soon goes. What happens when the money has gone? Will your mum be allowed to stay in the same home?

ChocOrCheese · 31/07/2019 17:57

I don't fully understand what you are annoyed about, but I think it is that you have been asked to take the property off the market if you want to accept the £204k offer.

That is pretty standard - nobody wants to spend money on instructing solicitors, commissioning searches and surveys etc, only to find someone comes along in a couple of weeks and offers £205k which you then accept.

If you think you have a realistic chance of getting closer to asking price then you can always decline the offer and keep the house on the market. It may cause the buyer to up their offer, but equally they may walk away.

If I were in that position my main concern would be to make sure the estate agent knows the buyer is in a good position to proceed - i.e. has finance agreed in principle and a completed chain if the buyer has a related sale. If not, then definitely leave it on the market for now.

BeanBag7 · 31/07/2019 17:57

I'd you've two offers cant you say to the lower one "someone else has offered higher, can you beat their offer"?

Renting is also an option but then you have the hassle of being a landlord

Purplejay · 31/07/2019 17:59

Quite normal to ask for a property to be removed from the market once am offer has been accepted. Have you never watched Location, Location, Location?

endofthelinefinally · 31/07/2019 18:00

BloomingHydrangea
It is difficult to get a high enough rent to cover care home fees.

darumafan · 31/07/2019 18:02

Renting isn't really an option, care costs per month usually far exceed the rent you can get on a property.
You also need the certainty of 12 months a year occupancy to cover the costs of the care home.

OllyBJolly · 31/07/2019 18:05

If you've had two offers in three days does that mean there's a lot of interest? Might be worth holding off to see if a buyer comes along with a better offer.

Haven't bought a house for a long time (too stressful to repeat after last experience!) but I always make offer conditional on the property coming off the market. If the buyer wants a quick sale they'll do it.

Original poster

Yarisalpaca · 31/07/2019 18:07

Renting it out isn't an option. We are too old for that!

And that's what I meant don't know why I felt annoyed. It's history I suppose my mum and dad lived in that house for 65 years. But what you say makes sense. The other offer is for buy to rent so not willing to offer more.

As long as she has lived in this care home for at least a year when the money runs out apparently they can't make her leave. Or so I understand.

Thanks you have made me realise I am running on sentiment and not common sense.

OP posts:

ittakes2 · 31/07/2019 18:37

It’s common to ask that as people starry paying for solicitors etc

CanILeavenowplease · 31/07/2019 19:07

As long as she has lived in this care home for at least a year when the money runs out apparently they can't make her leave

Who told you this? The fees will need to be paid. Your local authority will have some kind of funding formula they use to work out what they will pay. If the home requires more than what the LA will pay, you need to pay the difference. If you can’t/won’t pay the difference, your mum will need to move homes. I know this is a difficult time - I put my mum in a home a year ago and she died a couple of months ago - but please be clear on the ‘what ifs’ to avoid any further upset and distress. Hope all goes well with the sale.

AnAC12UCOinanOCG · 31/07/2019 19:12

Why would you accept an offer and then leave it on the market to invite more? Either the offer is accepted or declined: you can't keep them hanging on while you try to find a better price.

Well, you can, but they can equally say that's a horrible way to treat people and withdraw their offer.

LoafofSellotape · 31/07/2019 19:16

Totally normal. The buyers won't want to go ahead with searches etc unless you agree.

VictoriaBun · 31/07/2019 19:19

Not sentimental at all. When I had to sell what was my childhood home due to my last parent dying. On my last time there I wandered around it touching walls, sitting on the back door step like I used to as a child shelling peas with my mum.
Remembering Christmases past and being upset I will never open the door and feel like I've come home. It's all understandable.

Alsohuman · 31/07/2019 19:24

It’s horrible selling your parents’ home. One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. 💐

In answer to your question, it’s very normal to take the house off the market once an offer’s been accepted.

cardibach · 31/07/2019 19:30

Renting it out isn't an option. We are too old for that!
@Yarisalpaca what do you mean by this? What difference does your age make? Get an agent and get it rented. At least see if renting will cover the costs.

Nonnymum · 31/07/2019 19:35

If its only been on the market for a couple of days I would be tempted to leave it for a while. What have other similar houses gone for in the area? When it was values did the Estate agent think you could get nearer 210? Here the estate agents tend to leave houses on until interest wanes. Usually a couple of weeks. Then if there are several offers they ask for final bids then chose who to go with.

Alsohuman · 31/07/2019 19:36

It’s bloody hard to sell a house right now.

Nomorepies · 31/07/2019 19:44

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on the poster's request.

endofthelinefinally · 31/07/2019 19:46

cardibach, the OP would need rent of around £4.5K a month minimum in order to pay fees. That just isn't realistic IMO.
The rent has to cover fees, but also insurance, repairs, managing agents fees (managing a rental property yourself is a big job due to increasingly complicated legislation). It is also quite stressful unless you get perfect tenants.

LightsInOtherPeoplesHouses · 31/07/2019 20:17

Does the house have to be sold now? It doesn't always have to be sold immediately as I understand it, so renting it out for a few years before selling it could make the money go further - depending on what, if anything, would have to be done to make it 'rentable' and how good your tenants were. Though I'd perfectly understand if you didn't want to rent it out, my family looked into that for my DGM house when she went into a care home and we decided against it in the end.

As to the question, it's pretty standard if an offer is accepted.

Sorry about your DM

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