'Detained' at petrol station for not having my bank card

[Willowcat77]

Yesterday I stopped at my local village petrol station to refuel. I was on my way to pick up my DS for an important hospital appointment. I am a regular customer as it is the only petrol station/shop in the area and always get my car MOT'd there. My DP has been a customer/friend of the owners for over 20 years.

I went to the counter to pay but then realised that I'd left my bank card at home. The shop assistants knew me by sight so I said I'm really sorry but I'll need to go home to get my card, my house is only 5 minutes down the road. The assistant told me no, I would have to phone someone to pay for me and that I was forbidden to leave the premises!

I was very taken aback, but I phoned my DP. Unfortunately he wasn't answering his phone so I had to leave a voicemail. There was nobody else I could phone in the area. I was very worried about missing the hospital appointment, so I tried to reason with the shop assistants. I explained the situation and offered to leave my phone and £20 cash as security whilst I fetched my card. My petrol bill was £39. They knew I was local and my DP and I have spent 1000s of pounds there over the years.

They refused, saying if necessary I would have to stay there all day until my DP came to pay for me. They said this was "the rule". I wanted to speak to the owner but he wasn't in. I have ASD and am easily panicked. I was getting later and later for the hospital appointment and could feel I was having a proper ASD meltdown. I was getting so distressed I couldn't even redial my DPs number any more and had to ask them to do it. Eventually, after about 20 minutes, DP unexpectedly arrived and paid for me. I still feel very upset and that I can't ever go there again out of embarrassment.

My DP has since found out they did something similar to an older lady recently who was also local and a regular customer.

Aibu to feel I was treated badly and to make a complaint to the owner today? What were my rights in this situation? Could I have left to get the money?

Something which I don’t think anyone has mentioned here (I’ve just skimmed through quickly). Why can’t you just ring a family member or a good friend and ask them to pay over the phone with their credit card. Has anyone ever done this?

I don't think they detained you. They asked you to stay until someone could pay and you complied.

YABU - you should have left and returned promptly to pay.

This was badly handled but I can see it from the assistant point of few too.

If it is a busy garage they could see hundreds of people daily. You may think that the assistant knows you but you maybe just another face in a crowd to them. They probably were following company policy. The fact you have asd and were late for an appointment was unknown to them. They were not going to risk there pay/job just because you are a regular customer. Maybe they know that their local police will not follow up.

The policy is wrong and maybe if your husband is friends of the manager he could mention it and suggest the alternatives raised here.

Do get into the habit of checking you have your bank card/wallet etc when leaving the house.

Might be worth getting one of those prepaid credit cards and put £50 on it and keep it hidden in the car 8f you can afford it.Then you have it if you forget your card.

Unless the owner is horrified at how you were treated, and apologises, take your business elsewhere. Make sure you let local people know how you we’re treated.

I would have just left and come back with the pyt. How would they stop you! Yes I would complain they almost made you late for a very important appointment. Normal practice is to make you fill in a form not to hold you there against your will! They could easily have taken your car reg details and some ID and then if you didn't return I could be followed up by the police. Totally unnecessary to do what they did.

@abitfedup employers break the law all the time. This can't be news to you. As PP have said, it happens in retail, it happens in hospitality. Employers break the law with regard to rest breaks between shifts, mandatory breaks during shifts, etc, all the time. They rely on the fact that employees don't have the knowledge of the law, funds or financial security to stop it.

Returning to pay would mean you hadn't stolen the petrol.
Leaving the premises before paying means you have stolen it. Otherwise the police wouldn’t be involved if you do. By your argument I could drive off and come back in a month to pay for it and I haven’t done anything wrong.

My dp forgot to pay one day.Went in got sweets for the kids and drove off.Half way down the road he remembered and went back to pay.The garage was just about to ring the guards.

I did a similar thing. Driving home from a trip away (in OH’s car) was distracted because the coffee machine was playing up. The cashier was helping me get it sorted and even got a free kitkat. He didn’t ask “do you have fuel” and I had forgotten all about it. First I knew was when I got home and my husband got a call from the police. He says my face was a picture at the realisation of what I’d done. As the garage was 150 miles away they didn’t expect me to go right back to pay, they couldn’t take payment over the phone but agreed to wait a couple of weeks til someone I knew was going to be passing and would pay.

Seems the OP’s station was being very heavy handed, but it is absolutely their right to have whichever policy suits them. I wonder what would happen with a customer who didn’t have anyone who could pop in?

Lesson learned though, I always check my purse for cards or cash before I fill up. Most stations I’ve been to have a sign reminding you to do that.

I don't think you were detained. I think you were asked to find someone who could pay.
I think it is up to the garage to decide how to proceed with this (which is a reasonably common and annoying, and loss-creating scenario) - many will have a form for someone to fill in and ask for something to be left as security if you are leaving. They wouldn't physically prevent you from leaving and I suspect it was your interpretation of events which made you anxious rather than what they did.

If you feel their behaviour was poor, then certainly email their head off ie and state your complaint clearly and don't return.

Large amounts of money are loss by garages every year through non-payment. Some of those non-payers look like nice middle class middle aged people who wouldn't do such a thing......but they do. Garages do need to have some fairly robust measures in place but also accept this will happen sometimes. No garage is ever going to be thrilled to hear someone who has just filled up can't pay and anyone in this situation can expect to feel rather embarrassed. I think some people these days feel that if they feel embarrassed somehow someone must have violated their civil liberties and suddenly the other person is in the wrong. Is there a little of this going on here?

What would they have done if you didn't have anyone who could come in and pay for you? I don't have a car but if I did, I wouldn't necessarily have anyone available to come (family lives in a different country and I don't have a partner, most friends would be at work or live hours away).

Getting you to walk home to get your card and leave your car (and keys) with them would surely have made more sense and been quicker in this situation?

They were very harsh, though I can understand they may have been stung before by people not coming back to pay.

I did this once - got to the till and realised I'd taken my bank card out of my purse earlier when I bought something online then I hadn't put it back in my wallet. I was very apologetic, told them I needed to run home to get my card and I moved my car into one of the parking spots so it wasn't blocking the pump. They were absolutely fine with me, I only live down the road so it took about five minutes to get back and pay. The manager came out at that point and actually told the cashier off for making me leave my car there while I got my card as it was chucking it down and I was very pregnant! Tbf I did that voluntarily, he didn't actually ask me to do that. And yes, I'm middle class, white, female and appear neurotypical. If I'd not been any of those things I may have got a different response.

I don't think they have any legal right to detain you. They can call the police and ask them to arrest/detain you, but that's overkill if you can leave the car and nip home and back within minutes.

This happened to me once - I was mortified that I had left my card at home but the manager was absolutely fine. He did a payment pending thingy and I gave in my name and contact details along with car reg. Got my card from home and paid.
Can’t your DP just ask his friend (the owner) what their policy and procedure is for this situation?

Poor OP, that sounds awful.

I’ve seen at least two men during my petrol paying life not have funds, they both filled in a form and left.

The detaining tactic would only be of use if the person had a family member or friend who could bring along a means of payment. If they didn't (or said they hadn't) there'd be absolutely no point in doing this, - unless they wanted all non-payers to take up permanent residence in the petrol station. So they must have a procedure to deal with cases like that without detaining people.

Goodness. Surely there are forms? And processes. They would only be 'stung' by criminals, ie those who Never had any intention to pay / gave false addresses etc.

Why keep her there?

With a normal Person forgetting their card and then God forbid forgetting to go back and pay, presumably the petrol station would just follow legal proceedings to get their money back? whatever those are: eg start small claims?

Blimey, OP, that sounds very stressful.
As for stealing, I don't think it would be if you went in and said "I've forgotten my card, here's my name and address I'll be back in a jiffy"

If the staff could see the stress OP was under (and it wouldn't matter that it was ASD or anything else) and she was in a bit of a state, the kind thing would be to take her to one side, let her calm down and then all move on. That's what's so often missing, kindness.

I'd be in touch with the owner too to find out what his actual policy is. And then not use it again if it is as described.

Unfortunately people in these kind of low-paid roles do not have the money to take employers to court. If they tried they would lose their jobs. And again, when that happens they can't afford to sue for dismissal, and anyway, that doesn't matter when you don't have a job with which to earn a living, or any prospect of one because you need a reference.

Join. A. Union. Everyone.

My DP has just gone off to talk to the garage owner, it's awkward because he's known him for many years. I don't want to get anyone into trouble but DP says at they either need a more coherent policy or some staff training. To clarify, I live 5 minutes drive away, not 5 minutes walk, and I had a hospital appointment to get to. In any case they said I couldn't leave the premises and that I'd have to wait all day if necessary. I feel really stupid now for not just going but it just didn't occur to me as an option. Also I don't use the word meltdown lightly. I have an official diagnosis of ASD and experience extreme anxiety in unexpected situations.

Thank you for the suggestion of the Apple/Android phone payment, I'm going to look into that.

Sorry, I think this is absolutely ridiculous. Good thing about having id cards in the country I live. This happened to my dh, they took his details (if you don't pay up you have to go to the small claims court). He went in later that day and paid. No need for meltdowns.

Something which I don’t think anyone has mentioned here (I’ve just skimmed through quickly). Why can’t you just ring a family member or a good friend and ask them to pay over the phone with their credit card. Has anyone ever done this

Possibly because some people don't have family or have friends with a spare £40 to hand.

I know I would struggle to pay if I wasn't allowed to drive back to the house to get a card.

I am unsure how petrol stations lose out if someone drives away. Unless they have false number plates surely they can track the owner of the car down

Possibly because some people don't have family or have friends with a spare £40 to hand.

Even if you do, you might not want to ask them for a favour of this kind.

Contact the local newspaper and throw the full PTSD shit at them...how dare they!!!

I work in a petrol station and this happens a lot. We just take the customers phone number and they come back in again to pay. However other petrol stations in our chain have had problems with people promising to return and they haven't so maybe it's the case here. I realise they know you but if they have been told to not let people go without payment they can't make exceptions.

There is a difference between them not agreeing to you leaving and physically stopping you. It doesn't sound like they did that.

If they agree to give you time to pay and then you don't, I would think it would then be a civil issue like any other debt so I can see why they wouldn't agree to it.

It isn't a great policy because if you wanted to nick the petrol, you wouldnt be in the shop offering them your phone.

The idiots have lost a good local customer, more fool them.

FFS, lets get this straight. If the OP genuinely discovered she'd forgotten her bank card after filling up, she's not guilty of any offence.
It's all about Intention.

If they tried to physically detain you, that would be unlawful. In your position, I'd have told them I'd phone up later with my bank details as soon as I got home and I'd have driven off and got on with my day.

You should have been offered a "promise to pay" form, they can't detain you against your will unless they wanted to effect a citizens arrest.