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AIBU?

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Original poster

Can I turn this around? Old and haggard

68 replies

Michaelstwin · 30/07/2019 23:05

I am in my mid forties and have haD overwhelming stress with children who have SN , for the last 5 years . I look so old and tired and with that I had really lost interest in myself .
I feel like We’ve turned a corner with the children! Life is getting easier and I feel like I can get out and about again to
Meet friends, have dinner etc. However I would really like some advice as to whether I can revert back to somewhat polished rather than the exhausted wreck I’ve become. My confidence feels like it’s coming back as I am now beginning to find interest in hair and skincare and style. I just don’t know where to start!
Once upon a tome( a hundred years ago it seems) I was often told that I resembled the face of CZJ. I now resemble her DH.
Any advice where to start. Is it salvageable ?
I am a tall proportioned size 14. Thanks to full ish cheeks I am not very lined at all but my skin and hair are dry and grey. Where do I even begin ? Thanks for reading this if you got this far.

OP posts:
Original poster
Michaelstwin · 31/07/2019 00:43

Great thanks

OP posts:
nettie434 · 31/07/2019 00:48

Michaelstwin So pleased for you that things are looking up. I have been quite impressed with Caroline Hirons. She even does an old fashioned blog as well as lots of You Tubing. She loves double cleansing and I am surprised at how much difference it makes when you have make up on. Don’t do it on non make up days so I am probably too sloppy for words.

I love Kerastase hair stuff but salons often have amazing treatments for hair that really improve the texture so ask when you go in for your cut/colour.

You have got lots of good points (tall, and no lines). It sounds as if with just a few changes you will be out glamming CJZ.

Bignicetree · 31/07/2019 00:48

Please don’t waste your money having your colours done (like I did)

Original poster
Michaelstwin · 31/07/2019 00:55

My CZJ days are well gone but I look forward to moving on from wurzel with all of these tips thanks

OP posts:
spongedog · 31/07/2019 00:59

Michaelstwin Tue 30-Jul-19 23:24:31

Thanks once more. My hair is very dark brown. I have an entire rim of grey that needs to be dyed every few weeks as itI goes white . Would i need to go to salon every three weeks ? Any salon skincare brands that you would suggest?

I was originally very dark brown hair, with pale skin. I was very gray by mid 30's. My hairdresser suggested changing the base colour to more mid brown - apparently skin tone lightens as you get older. I even manage blond highlights. I get my roots done every 4-6 weeks. I look at friends who are still trying to keep their hair colour as it was and it is too dark for most of them. I wont be going grey anytime soon and I am now mid-50s!

Original poster
Michaelstwin · 31/07/2019 01:01

Sounds good and it’s. become v faded after being in the sun so much so now may be a good time

OP posts:
IdaBWells · 31/07/2019 01:27

Weight training. Join a gym and get a personal trainer, building strength and muscle is amazing for improving posture, resilience, mood and sculpting your body. Feeling strong is a fantastic feeling and a great stress reliever as you are tightening and then relaxing muscles. You can combine with cardio but even alone will make great improvements in your well being. It is extremely hard for a woman to get muscles like a man so you will just become a streamlined version of yourself.

Cosentyx · 31/07/2019 01:47

Spot on, Ida. I couldn't agree more. Definitely invest in your well-being and health as she suggests, it's worth far more than any hair treatments or makeup or colours. You'll just feel so much better about yourself and actually be healthier! Helps cope with stress and anxiety, too.

mathanxiety · 31/07/2019 02:17

I would give the Korean masks a whirl.

Also an exfoliating facial, and get your hair done. Now would be an excellent time to go grey if you want to grab that by the horns.

Above all and before everything else though, make sure you get a good, thorough medical exam annually, do your pap smears, get your mammograms when that time comes, and get back into exercise.

I recommend lots of water and Biotin (Vitamin B7, formerly known as Vitamin H and coenzyme R). It's great for skin, nails and hair.

Keep up the walking and work some weight bearing/lifting exercise into your routine. Increase the fibre in your diet - all your daily fruit and veg and whole grains too.

northernstarsoutherncross · 31/07/2019 02:29

After years battling my coarse, wavy coloured hair I have a Keratin blow-dry. I look groomed without having to make any effort. If you are willing to spend, it's worth considering.

cafenoirbiscuit · 31/07/2019 03:16

Have a look at Kettlewell Colours. Their clothes are categorised by season, and they can point you to an advisor if you’re not sure which one you are.

TerrorAustralis · 31/07/2019 03:58

I'm also mid-forties and have recently been getting into YouTube videos for make-up & skincare routines. People like Tati are good, but she really tends to pile it on and I feel her look is more suited you younger women. Check out Hot and Flashy - she's in her 50s and her routines and application is more suited to women our age.

I know a lot have recommended getting a colour, but unless you really hate your greys, I would avoid colouring. Apart from the maintenance and damage to your hair, I think colouring can sometimes make you look older and you kind of get sucked into keeping up with it. I think having a good cut (regularly) and keeping your hair well groomed is more important than the colour.

Most importantly, have fun with your transformation!

WelshMoth · 31/07/2019 04:53

Water intake is crucial. My eyes puff terribly if I've not drunk enough. My skin is amazing when I get into the routine of drinking loads of water.

My Perfect Eyes has been a fab little product for tightening around the eyes.

avocadoincident · 31/07/2019 05:16

Definitely new underwear ASAP with a ratio of 3:1. One bra to 3 matching pants.

Happy new you!

SomeAfternoonDelight · 31/07/2019 06:08

Oh OP You made me laugh!
It depends how far you’d want to go? Would you consider filler? A good night cream - Lancôme £70. Daily moisturising tan - dove £5. Hair cut and colour £70 keep it natural for now I would say and find a style you like. Eyebrows waxed and tinted £10-£20. LVL Eyelash lift or Eyelashes - £30-£40. Nails done - £30 toes done £20. So much you can do OP if it’s what you want to do! But I would start going to a exercise class because they make you feel good and you get out and socialise! Go out with friends! Get you back to you xxx

Hammondisback · 31/07/2019 06:36

La Roche Posay Redermic - the retinol face, eye and vitamin C serums. They are brilliant - help your skin to glow and suitable for sensitive skin. I would also go on Instagram for fashion tips - there are some great over 40 instagrammers, for inspiration. I’d also visit a Clinique make up stand and have a free makeover - no obligation to buy, but it will give you an idea of what suits you. Their foundations are fab, IMHO. So happy for you that you life has become so much easier Flowers

Hammondisback · 31/07/2019 06:36

*your

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