Help- how do I de-contaminate my washing?

[Riv]

Posting for traffic here.
So ashamed and now don’t know what to do.
Friends dropped in and, you know how it goes, they stayed for supper, wine was taken.... they’ve just left.
Horror of horrors! My washing! It’s still on the line! Its been darked on!
How can I possibly put this right before anyone realises irl?
AIBU to just sneak it back into the cupboard and hope no one has noticed?
Can anyone suggest what I can do for the best? Will re-washing do the trick? Do I need a special darkening remover? Some secret mumsnet chant? I think I can iron some of the things, but will that make it worse? I rarely iron anything but will do it as penance if I must.
Please help me to hide this shame😰

If I’m feeling particularly devilish, I deliberately leave mine out and prance around the garden after dark flicking the Vs in the neighbour’s direction. 😈 🕷

"101...yes I'd like to report a violent crime"

You fold it nicely and put it away and we'll never speak of this again. But we'll always remember.

I oil the dogs for a walk last night, when I got home DH said very sternly ‘I’ve got the washing in for you’

I mean how great full should I have been? It was gone 9pm.

Spiders have penises Misses point of thread.

@AcrossthePond55
😂😂😂

Don't iron! It seals the dark in!

Nothing is more hopeless than a scheme for merriment.

Ok, thank you all for your lovely advice. I am currently in sackcloth and promise to only eat biscuits for the next week.
I’ve set all of my scented candles (and- horror- some unscented from the back of the shed! 🤫) in a circle around the “offending things” and put all the empty jam jars I can find underneath (don’t have any beakers so hopefully they will do)
I’ve sprayed everything with a solution of vanish, the strange bottle of something that the neighbours brought back from their last holiday and the bottle of something alcoholic that has been left at many a party and won at several school fetes.
Set the unmentionables alight on the (disposable) barbecue and danced about a bit banging shoe box lids and singing snatches of ABBA songs and Incy Wincy Spider for good measure. Backwards of course and rather quietly so as not to scare the cat.
Popped the remaining bundle in the washer at 30 and am about to ring the estate agent .
Is it enough? And will it deal with the slugs and snails tolerable ? Do they even have 🍆?
How long before I can post again? When can I take up a new identity as Riv the Redeemed?

GreenTulips you have a lovely DH saving the family from shame- is oiling the dog and leaving him to bring in the laundry a good charm against the darkening? Should I now get a dog to oil? What sort of oil is best? Don’t want to hurt the dog or cause it to share the shame.

And obviously, my head is well and truly wobbled.
Off to lick wounds and hang head in shame.
Thank you all for cheering me up after a tough day.

Wait wait
What is this? Does this mean when you leave washing overnight? I was raised abroad.
Is this why my neighbour doesn't talk to me?
I do it all the time

Burn the washing
Burn the washing line
Burn the witch

Please tell me you have t done this in front of your our neighbour’s children, OP? I really don’t want to get SS involved. I’m actually shocked that no one on Mumsnet, given most of the members are mothers, have given any thought to the impact this could have on any children that have looked out of their window and seen clothes fluttering in the night air! Those poor poor children. The cruelty! 😭

Sending forts and pears hun xxxx

I was prepared for the subject of this thread by the title so wasn't shocked, but what I wasn't prepared for was Green Tulips frankly shocking admission that she oils her dogs prior to walking them. I'm torn between not wanting to think about that any more and wanting to know the sordid details.

Never mind the washing - you let friends drop in???????

I'm an atheist but I hope god can forgive you