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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To tell friend to get a taxi

98 replies

CupidIsFired · 29/07/2019 22:12

Going on holiday tomorrow, flying from my city. My friend is coming too but she lives an hour and a half away on a train so is travelling up in the morning. Originally she was going to book a train to get her in for 4 hours before the flight, we would meet her at the station and then head to the airport. She booked a ticket to get her in 2 hours before the flight time... I told her she was cutting it fine and not giving any time for delays or traffic as this time of the year is very busy in this city. So she changed it to arrive at 9:30am which is 5 and a half hours before the flight, that's fine I said she can come to mine and we can go from there. She called me today to say I need to meet her at the train station as she's hurt her back and has been told not to/can't lift anything and bring her back to my house. I have a DD who is 15 months who's also coming on holiday, I have to sort her out and also myself and make sure everything is organised as I'm a very stressful traveller (I hate this trait about me) so now having to wake earlier to make sure I've given DD breakfast got her ready and myself ready. And be at the station in time. WIBU to tell friend I can't come, to get a taxi to my house and I will help her from there? She will have to get to the train station in her city and on the train herself anyway? Or would I be a bad friend for this?

OP posts:

Original poster

CupidIsFired · 30/07/2019 09:16

It's fine, I've spoken to her and she's going to wait at the station until 11, although she didn't seem best pleased and said try not to be any later than 11. At least I have some time to make sure everything is sorted

OP posts:

SeeSomethingSaySomething · 30/07/2019 09:31

she didn't seem best pleased and said try not to be any later than 11

This attitude is awful and it does not bode well OP, she’s treating you like an employee.

What did she say about luggage?

fedup21 · 30/07/2019 09:55

WTF! So you are walking down there at 11 with a toddler to help her with her stuff? Where will your toddler be??

Are you planning on doing this all holiday long?

This is unusual holiday set up dynamic-a holiday with your toddler, a friend and your mum. Have you done this before?

What is your friend like (she is not coming across well so far)? Is she going to want you and your mum to be her servants for the week??

dustarr73 · 30/07/2019 09:57

@CupidIsFired be careful about not paying for things.You said she doesnt get paid till tomorrow,dont lend her anything.She sounds just the sort to not pay you back.

I hope you have a lovely holiday,and your friend doesnt ruin it.

frazzledasarock · 30/07/2019 09:58

She has a prolapsed disc?

You realise you’re going to be carrying her luggage for her then?

Perhaps she should cancel till she’s well enough to get herself and her stuff to the destination

browzingss · 30/07/2019 11:16

I realise that you have probably already met up now, but in future if your friend needs assistance to alight/depart a train or within a station, then she can arrange this. Just contact the company that manages the station, whether that’s national rail or a train operating company, and they can arrange staff to get ramps and carry her luggage etc.

AnathemaPulsifer · 30/07/2019 11:28

How are you meant to sort her case and your DD on the walk back?

Rockmeamaryllis · 30/07/2019 11:31

I assume you’re going abroad. Has your friend got insurance and has she updated them with this recent injury?

JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 30/07/2019 11:33

I can’t believe she would rather wait at the station for an hour and a half than just get a taxi to yours that would take 5 minutes!

Also OP. Make sure to ask her how she’s going to manage them bags on holiday. It makes it clear that you and your mother won’t be carrying them.

onalongsabbatical · 30/07/2019 11:35

If she was being sensible and taking responsibility for herself she would, with a recently prolapsed disc, cancel. I can’t see this holiday going well OP. Above all you’re going to need good boundaries – no, I can’t help you with that, I need to look after dd – etc etc ad nauseum. Not going to be easy I’m guessing. Good luck though – we’re here for back up!

huuskymam · 30/07/2019 11:48

You do realise she is expecting you to lug her suitcase to and from the airports. You may want to nip that in the bud before you leave.

PuppyMonkey · 30/07/2019 11:58

This is why I never go on holiday. I’m stressed just reading this.

ohcanada · 30/07/2019 12:06

Can you not just say 'if 11 doesn't work then get a taxi, I'll pay for it if it's an issue'

DanielRicciardosSmile · 30/07/2019 12:08

WTF! So you are walking down there at 11 with a toddler to help her with her stuff? Where will your toddler be??

Obviously I don't know for certain, but I would imagine OP, toddler and DM are picking up CF-friend in the taxi they're taking to the airport.

onalongsabbatical · 30/07/2019 12:16

ohcanada a) It’s already gone 11.
b) If she starts offering to pay for stuff it’ll never end!

OnTheEdgeOfTheNight · 30/07/2019 12:16

Oh please ask if she's informed her travel insurance company before you fly. Sitting in an aeroplane plus the usual travelling could worsen her condition and she could find the travel insurance doesn't cover this undisclosed existing condition.

SeaEagle21 · 30/07/2019 12:42

"That won't work for me" is my go-to answer to requests like this. She is a CF.

Sunburntnoseandears · 30/07/2019 14:16

Maybe the luggage hold will be more comfy and you can enjoy the journey?

Triskaidekaphilia · 30/07/2019 14:25

I see it's too late to input on the train station situation but don't carry her bags OP! Hope you enjoy your holiday :)

Topttumps · 30/07/2019 19:52

Hope you have a good holiday.

Original poster

CupidIsFired · 01/08/2019 09:02

Thank you everyone for the replies and good holiday wishes!
The travel was a little stressful, my friend hadn't seen DD since before she started walking so didn't realise how much more difficult things are now, although she still tried it on with the bad back. I helped where possible to try and be a good friend but have now made it clear that I have my hands full already. She was uncomfortable on the flight and said she was in pain but she has been out drinking both nights being here and hasn't complained while being out so maybe it's getting better. Im not sure about her travel insurance, I would hope she had updated them on her condition incase anything were to happen. Other friends are arriving tonight who don't have children and she keeps saying how it will be "much better" when they arrive, so I guess she will go off and do her own thing with them from tonight. DD is having a great time and getting lots of attention, apart from the occasional tantrum from DD, the holiday is going well and we are enjoying.

OP posts:

SeeSomethingSaySomething · 01/08/2019 12:11

Glad you’re having a great time OP!

MachineBee · 01/08/2019 22:34

Really glad you’re having a good time OP. I hope your other friends still involve you and your DD.

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