child left unsupervised in a park

[snuggie]

AIBU to be absolutely raging that my child was taken to a park on a playdate and left there with his 2 friends for an hour with no adult supervision. The park was a 5-7 min walk from the house at which he was to have a playdate in. I had asked that my child did not go beyond the gate as he has just turned 8 and the house was on quite a busy road in the middle of a housing estate. The parent told my child not to tell me!!! My child returned home and told me older children in the park were teasing them and he was very subdued and out of sorts. For the record I am not a helicopter mum and am very measured and realistic but I cant help thinking anything could have happened.

Yanbu because you said where your child could go and the other child’s parents ignored you and also told your child not to tell you! I wouldn’t be letting my child go to there house again and I don’t say that lightly.

Parents should respect others wishes. Round here we checked before allowing/taking other people kids to the park, or playing games or watching films (with older age ratings) until they were about 10/11. I let my son go to the park from about 9 if we took him and left him for a time with a parent who agreed. We all
Know our kids and they are ready at different times.

Having said that my son and his mates get more grief at the park now they are at secondary (12). No one bothers the primary kids.

Oh and as well as knowing your kids and them being ‘ready’ at different ages, it depends massively on where you live as to what you will allow and when.

I assume you told this family that you were very unhappy about the situation and that this was the last playdate your child would be coming on with them and why, because telling the world of the internet is really irrelevant

It's not about trusting your 8 year old.

It's them hurting themselves. Crossing roads. Feeling intimidated by older kids. Being pressured to copy their friends etc

Three times in five whole years, huh? Wow, what an epidemic. It happened in our lovely area too last year and everyone went nuts. Of course, the real story about how it was the child’s estranged father never made the headlines. As it is in the vast majority of attempted (and actual) abductions of children

Of course. Of course you know better. Should have seen it coming.

My preference is to assess risks with actual facts, against probable outcomes

I'd hazard a guess that other parents do exactly the same thing.

if you come at me for how I parent mine, then I will respond in kind

I didn't see this attack upon how you parent your kids. I must have missed it upthread.

If I was hosting a child here and they were left with a list of demands on how I should and shouldn’t care for them I’d be sending them back home

I hardly think a parent requesting their child isn't allowed out of the house unsupervised is a 'list of demands'. An 8 year old not being allowed to play unsupervised in a park is hardly unusual.

YANBU

Parks are overrun with teenagers especially in the holidays and unfortunately some kids bully and take the mick out of younger ones, I'd be very upset

Three times in five whole years, huh? Wow, what an epidemic

Child abduction by a stranger is rare but the consequences are devastating beyond belief.

Exactly formerbabe

One of the reasons it’s rare is that nowadays there aren’t many opportunities for it.

You are right to be annoyed op, thid happened to me when my son was 7, i never let him and his twin out of the gaeden unless they wee in a friends garden as there was a very busy road very close to us
My sons friend same age asked if he could go and play at his house, i said yes but don't go out of the gardn, next thing i knew i had some girl knocking on my door saying he had been run over
The other childs mother was not ven up, she was still in bed,while my son and hes were playing on that very busy roadside at football
My son was in hospital for 9 weeks, with a broken femur
Not only was he badly injured but i had o take 2 buses everyday to the hospital and find someone to look after my other children

Whatever decision about your child should be done after asking/checking with you. 8 is too young for me but maybe ok for someone else but it depends on the child's maturity and the area. I won't be sending for any play dates and the trust is gone.

At the age of 8 I was going to the park with my friends every time I got a chance. There were no adults involved, we were out playing and decided to walk the mile to the park.
Parks are for playing in and are the place that children can play.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.mylondon.news/news/south-london-news/man-arrested-after-8-year-16445256.amp

For those saying an 8 year old should is fine to go to the park by themselves, please read this.
It happend only a month ago 10 mins from where I live.

It was wrong to go against your specific wishes however, 8 is more than old enough in my book to go to a park with their mates unaccompanied.

I don't think it's inherently wrong to let 8 year olds play in the park without an adult but encouraging your child to lie to you is pretty awful and the park your child ended up in sounded grim. At 8 I might let DD go somewhere without an adult but I'd want to know where and what the place was like.

I would not leave 8 year old in park unsupervised!