...to suggest that this person might not want to go to this event?

[IHaveNameChangedForThisThread]

So, there's a country show that a group of my friends are attending in fancy dress - theme being 'out of this world'. After a suggestion form the group, my friend is refusing to wear printed out pictures of things like Mars Bars/Galaxy bars/Milky ways, because she says it would "be advertising non-vegan products" - all the while not making suggestions for alternative costumes...

Now, here's the AIBU. This is all in aid of a country show that she wants to attend that has (among other things) a dog show, a horse show, ferret racing, falconry etc. Would it be unreasonable to maybe point out that she might want to reconsider going to the show in the first place?

Or should I keep just keep quiet?

a dog show, a horse show, ferret racing, falconry etc.

Why would any of that be objectionable to a vegan? They don’t torture the animals you know! I would’ve thought a vegan, someone who prioritises the welfare of animals would love to see a selection of well trained and cared for animals.

And yes, it is very clear you are pissed off with “friend” (funny use of the word friend BTW- friends are people you like) and want to punish them then for being “awkward” by having them not go. It’s very childish.

Why would anyone go to a country fair in fancy dress?
[misses point].

Couldn't she just have Starburst on her t-shirt? UK Starburst are vegan if I remember correctly.

Why would any of that be objectionable to a vegan? They don’t torture the animals you know! I would’ve thought a vegan, someone who prioritises the welfare of animals would love to see a selection of well trained and cared for animals.

My cousin who is quite a 'vocal', shall we say, vegan would be against that sort of thing because she doesn't believe that humans should be 'training' animals or using them in any way at all.

She can't really wear a t shirt with a product on it that she wouldn't eat. All her vegan friends will rip into her. Vegans are forever being scrutinized by others, they get a hard time. Just like now, with you! I would leave her out of the fancy dress. Just be glad that shes coming.

Totally missing point of thread but Cinaria you have made my day!

Why do you need to dress up for a country show surely if friend isn't comfortable she can just go normally (vegan or otherwise)?

Can't she just not go in fancy dress?

Agree with @thedancingbear

Cineraria sorry autocorrect

I'm guessing she wants to be involved in the fancy dress?

You may want to tell her what goes on there. If she has issue with falconry, she will have issues with the rest of it. She may not even realise what goes on there. The animals are generally well looked after, I mean you get the odd person who doesn't have the animals welfare at the front of their mind, but most are fine.

Even so I don't think she'd like it.

She's a knobhead.

If you are going to be "principled" you need to be universally principled .

I used to go to country shows. But as a VERY VEGGIE person I find some of the activities quite upsetting. As a Vegan I probably would want to give it a miss... irrespective of whether or not I had to follow some (bizzarrre!) dress code.

Uninvite her for the RIGHT reasons....

TBF the OP doesn’t say anything about T-shirts, it just says “printed out pictures.”

I am more surprised about a country show having a “theme” than anything else on this thread.

I thought that it was the OP and her friends who'd decided to have a theme, not the show. Hopefully the OP will return and clarify that for us.

Oh, right. That makes, erm, much more sense.

What do you mean 'in aid of the show'?

I hate fancy dress, vegan or otherwise, so I'd not be wearing silly T shirts, so presumably you'd tell me not to go either.

Anyway, yes, YABU to tell another adult what they can and cannot do with their time.

I do get where you are coming from OP, but surely she knows what is involved in the country show?

The usual misunderstanding of what it means to be vegan on this thread 🙄. I’m very surprised that as a vegan she is going to an event like that. It’s exactly what veganism stands against.

As your friend isn't putting forward any alternative suggestions then I think the consensus of the group wins the day. Fair enough if it's something 1 or 2 ppl don't want to join in with then they won't, but that's true with lots of groups & isn't a big deal. Swings & roundabouts. How will the rest being in fancy dress & them not affect them? Will your friend still be part of the group or is even standing close to someone wearing a Mars Bar cut-out frowned on?
If everyone else is happy with the costumes then in the absence of any alternative never mind a good one then go ahead with it.

Would it be unreasonable to maybe point out that she might want to reconsider going to the show in the first place?

Very unreasonable. She's an adult with a mind of her own and can decide for herself what she does or doesn't want to wear or whether she wants or not. Wearing fancy dress to such an event sounds weird to me but whatever floats your boat.

Mind your own business.

@Windyone

The usual misunderstanding of what it means to be vegan on this thread 🙄. I’m very surprised that as a vegan she is going to an event like that. It’s exactly what veganism stands against.

Veganism isn't a universal construct, it just means not eating or wearing animal products. Some vegans might object to wider practices regarding animals but it's not part of the definition.

I’ve been to plenty of country shows and never seen anyone in fancy dress - it’s not a bloody Hen do to Ibiza!
People dressed as chocolate bars would terrify the cows

I realise I’m totally missing the point of the post but I just cant get past a bunch of muppets looking at Barbour jackets, over priced wellies, artisan pork pies and the like while dressed as confectionary

This thread is going to inevitably descend into “proper vegans” telling other vegans/vegetarians that they’re not doing it well enough etc 😴😴😴

However, the main point I’d take away from this is attending a county show in fancy dress is totally cringey. It’s a terrible idea, and maybe your friend is just mortified at the thought

Why did you go for the chocolate bar theme and not print out pictures of actual planets / galaxies?

This leads to two questions for me.

1. do you think she doesn't know what is likely to be there? If you think this is the case you should tell her - you said she objected to falconry so it sounds as if she wouldnt enjoy it.

2. do you feel she will try to bring a downer? Is she going to go and say how awful it and basically ruin your day? (Please not I don't think this of vegans generally, in just reading between the lines of your post). If you think this is going to be the case tell her straight out that she knows what will be there and if she moans about it you will ditch her. (Moaning about it in general- if she sees something unexpected then that's ok).

Why would you go to a country show in fancy dress? It's totally ridiculous, inappropriate and childish. It's not a party. If your friend doesn't want to join in no-one would blame her. It's probably better if she stays away.