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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To despair of DD’s School re Healthy Eating?

101 replies

Bunnylady53 · 25/07/2019 20:03

They are so hypocritical! We got a letter home today about improving healthy eating eg fruit for snack time, bringing in sugar free sweets for birthdays etc. Then what do they give DD & her classmates on their last day? A bag containing sweets! Also they give sweets out as a reward for good work & there’s always a sweet stall at the fairs. At the summer fair, they have a stall where you can win jamjars crammed with sweets. Even at film night, they have sweets. It’s like they think kids are incapable of doing anything without having to be fed! Oh & often there are fundraisers where cakes are sold. I’m not against children having stuff like this but not so often & they need to be offered alternatives way more

OP posts:

floribunda18 · 26/07/2019 09:24

I think schools sometimes use a sledgehammer to crack a nut on these issue and also need to be "seen to be doing" various things to tick a box for Ofsted.

I can understand chocolate not being allowed in lunch boxes as it melts and makes a mess, but picking out cake and crisps when kids have a normal lunchbox of a sandwich or equivalent, fruit and/or veg, drink and dessert or some kind is over the top. Focus on the kids who have cold mcDonalds or a Twix and a Mars bar - or nothing - for their lunches, there are some in every school.

Also consider why so many kids are having packed lunches. DDs' school dinners have always been so rubbish that DD2 still had packed lunches even when she could have had free school meals in KS1 I sent her with a packed lunch. It wasn't just the quality of the food, it was quantity, and the fact they regularly seemed to run out when kids were on second sitting. I don't think it's acceptable to only be offered a dried up jacket potato and peas. DD2 has one more year at school, in a total of ten years (two DDs) with the school we have never had decent school dinners, and they've tried at least three different providers in that time. There will be another new one in September, but I'm not hopeful.

Original poster

Bunnylady53 · 26/07/2019 09:38

What a pp said about the PTA is right - if the school is so hot on promoting healthy eating, then the PTA could have vetoed the jamjars etc. At DD’s school they have “ The Friends” but I’m sure they have to run stuff they plan to do past the staff. It’s everyone working together.

OP posts:

JustTwoMoreSecs · 26/07/2019 10:42

I’m with you OP. I really don’y understand why schools give out sweets, or why the school dinners always have a cake/biscuit/ice cream option, just offer fruit or (un-sweetened) yoghurt.
It is not the role of school to offer unhealthy food, even as treats!

LolaSmiles · 26/07/2019 10:55

Then there’s the alcohol ‘policy’. We have a sports day, where everyone brings picnics. They’ve now banned alcohol, as its bad role-modeling for the kids. Fair enough (even though no one was having more than the odd glass). But how about the wine fundraising auction? The frequent ‘girls nights’ and ‘boys nights out’ organised by the PTA? The staff farewell drinkies (on-site)? Oh no, that would be unthinkable.
Gosh the terrible hypocrisy!
Make school events during the day with the children alcohol free, but have alcohol at events and celebrations for adults with a drink or two?
Total hypocrisy. Anyone would think one was a children's sports day and the other were adult occasions.

sheshootssheimplores · 26/07/2019 10:56

I completely agree. They are lunch box nazis if you provide your own but if you take up school dinners then it’s ice cream, doughnuts, cake. They promote healthy eating and yet allow parents to give out sweets on birthdays and have constant sweet and cake sales for the PTA 🙄

obviouslymarvellous · 26/07/2019 10:58

For the last three weeks our school has been plying the kids with cakes, sweets and ice creams. Same at school fair and last day. But if you send anything like a penguin bar in their packed lunch, (whilst school dinners have ice cream and biscuits cakes etc) you get the head emailing you telling you that you are not giving your child healthy options 🙄 such hypocrites!

notso · 26/07/2019 11:17

I think the only thing wrong with what you've posted is that the school gives out sweets for good work.

The healthy lunchbox rules are down to inspections. When I attended the inspection meeting for parents a third of the questions asked were to do with healthy schools. I found that ridiculous and told them so.

PTA stuff, join the PTA and suggest alternatives. I've zero time for people who loan about PTA stuff but don't want to do anything about it.

LetsSplashMummy · 26/07/2019 11:33

Just because they are given sweets, doesn't mean they have to eat them all straight away. You still have an element of control. You also don't have to enter competitions with sweetie jar prizes.

My kids put party bag sweets, occasional school sweets, Halloween sweets etc into a sweetie jar. They ask before they have something (and I "help" with reducing the quantity) from the jar. I hardly ever have to buy sweets as a result and they don't ask that often. If they come out of school with sweets, I'll just say "not now, let's stick them in the jar," or they share them out. I'd never let them eat a lot of sweets in front of people who haven't got any, for reasons other than healthy eating.

By teaching them deferred gratification and sharing you are doing a lot more good than just banning things. If a child gobbles up a party bag straight after an afternoon of party food and cake, there is the beginnings of a problem.

tttigress · 26/07/2019 11:50

Eating sweets in moderation is fine for a rapidly growing child.

It has been know for people to cause their children to be malnourished due to their extreme interpretation of healthy eating.

arethereanyleftatall · 26/07/2019 13:19

Yabu.
All this chat of hypocrisy is very short sighted.
No sweets at a school Fayre wouldn't be much fun for the kids would it? It's not going to happen.
So, to avoid the hypocrisy, would you prefer the school to allow sweets in lunchboxes then?
So, so stupid.

How people can get wound up on the 'no sweets in lunch boxes' rule I'll never know. This rule is a good thing. Regardless of anything else going on, this rule is a great rule, and your kid gets to eat healthy and someone else is the bad guy imposing the rule. It's completely win for the parent. It's such a negative whiny way of thinking to complain about it.

Benjispruce · 26/07/2019 14:01

If you win a sweetie jar you don't have to eat them all at once! Whatever happened to common sense?

Benjispruce · 26/07/2019 14:04

If you tasted the school cake and puddings you would realise they are not very sweet as they have to meet guidelines. Tasteless in my opinion. My school always has fresh fruit and natural yoghurt on offer too. Also the portions of pudding are tiny.

burblife · 26/07/2019 14:07

Schools have to teach a thousand and one things these days and in some schools healthy eating is way down the list. The need to pass inspections however, means that they have to be seen to be doing something. A quick letter home to parents covers this.

The message probably hasn't been communicated well to teaching/support staff. Lunchtime staff may have had different messages on when to flag concerns about unhealthy lunchboxes. PTA are another, separate body who in lots of schools organise their own events with very little input from staff, especially teachers.

Not really hypocrisy, more that there is no time or resources for proper joined up thinking.

Also, yes teachers could probably spend their money on non-edible end of term treats but sweets are far cheaper than buying stationery etc when multiplied by 30!

Benjispruce · 26/07/2019 14:08

It is not the role of school to offer unhealthy food, even as treats!

Real life will involve temptation and so I do think it is part of a child's education to learn what a portion looks like, i.e lots of veg, smaller amounts of fat and small, calorie and sugar controlled puddings.

Seeleyboo · 26/07/2019 14:09

Boils my blood. Nursery gave my 2 year old a bloody lollipop. This was a party bag from one of the other children. I mean, who does that. Boiled sweet lollipops for 2 year olds. Other than the obvious what about choking g hazard.

Benjispruce · 26/07/2019 14:12

That is a bit odd Seeley and I'm surprised that a nursery would do that.

notso · 26/07/2019 14:21

It was sent in by a parent by the sound of it Benjispruce.
My kids school gave out a party bag to my son contains peanut sweets. DS is allergic.

notso · 26/07/2019 14:26

Which is a good point actually after the peanut sweet I requested my kids to be excluded from any sweets/cake sent home from school.
Maybe you could go the same OP as well as join the PTA

Crunchymum · 26/07/2019 14:42

My youngest child will always be on a strict ketogenic diet, due to rare condition / endocrine issues and I do worry about how school will be for her.

Our school is nut free, healthy snacks only (fruit and veg) and has packed lunch and birthday treat guidelines.

Yet the last week of term my preschooler had an ice cream everyday!!

Our PTA always try to run a few healthy stalls (they had a strawberries and cream stall at the summer fair and usually some kind if fruit selling stall at Xmas) but all the kids want is cake and junk.

Original poster

Bunnylady53 · 26/07/2019 14:52

So now I’m stupid & whiney as well?! Again, lunchboxes weren’t mentioned in the letter from the school! So wind your neck in whoever said about being stupid & negative! DD doesn’t even have packed lunch as I have already stated!

OP posts:

Original poster

Bunnylady53 · 26/07/2019 14:53

Re the sweetie jars, of course the child doesn’t have to eat them all at once but equally they don’t have to be on sale/raffled in the first place

OP posts:

Original poster

Bunnylady53 · 26/07/2019 14:55

People really need to read the OP & the whole thread

OP posts:

Benjispruce · 26/07/2019 15:17

OP, I think if you have a problem with your school then you need to address it with them . My school isn't like yours as in sweets are not used as rewards, fruit and veg snacks etc. But we do have cake stalls run by the PTA twice a year! No big issue there. We also have a veg patch that the children maintain and we sell the produce after school.The majority of sweets brought into my school are from parents for birthdays and they are given at home time for the parents to decide.

But what is wrong with a sweetie jar stall? Kids love that sort of thing, it's magical to them, have you never watched Charlie and

Benjispruce · 26/07/2019 15:18

the Chocolate factory!

notso · 26/07/2019 15:27

Re the sweetie jars, of course the child doesn’t have to eat them all at once but equally they don’t have to be on sale/raffled in the first place

Think of something to replace them with then that raises the same amount of money.

It's not easy. As PTA we used to sell cans of drink, sweets and ice creams at sports days. It raised a lot of money.
There were various complaints from parents because school was being hypocritical and from staff because parents were giving competing children coke and magnums
We swapped to only selling water, tea, coffee and fruit.
People complained about hot drinks being dangerous and that there were no ice creams or cans and nobody really bought any fruit so we didn't raise much money.

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