To be signed off (pregnancy)?

[gonewiththepotter]

Long story short I’m about 4/5 weeks pregnant 🤯🤗. Nausea and dizziness is an issue (yes I’m taking vitamins 😬) and today have had horrible cervical crampy pains and abdominal pressure.

Went to Dr this aft and he thinks I’m over stressed (obviously fighting morning sickness) and need to ‘properly relax’ and take it VERY easy for a couple of weeks!

I’ve left with a two week sick note and a cyclizine prescription! DH attended with me and agrees with GP fully!

However I feel AWFUL saying this to my boss. Kinda feel like ‘that girl’ who doesn’t want to do PE because she has her period. There are numerous pregnant women in our office and they seem to be managing.

GP (male) actually said ‘I honestly think that’s just a horrible example of the way women are so often treated in the work place’ when I aired my concerns and asked if working from home would be acceptable.

So now I’m stuck between feeling like I’m copping out, (I’ve not exactly got HG - I just feel vile!) and feeling like I’m making an irresponsible choice for my own health/baby.

AIBU to go off sick?
Or AIBU to not listen to GP advice?

• WFH probably wouldn’t be a soloution as I can’t sleep well due to nausea so If I’m at home I keep nodding off all day! I tried it yesterday and couldn’t focus/ I was either asleep or feeling too sick to concentrate!

Just need some experiences mummy advice - I’m new to this.

YANBU - if you're sick you're sick, it's not like you chose to have pain and sickness!

You'll no doubt get a flurry of posts from Elevenerifers ("my sickness was so bad I DIED but still went to work") but if your GP thinks you need to take it easy please listen! Pregnancy is such a short time compared to the rest of your 40+ year career.

Oh, and congratulations!

Your pregnancy is your pregnancy. It isn't like anyone else's, because everyone's body is different. If you aren't well enough to work, to all there is to it. Never mind what anyone else is doing. They aren't living in your body with your particular mix of hormones and symptoms.
Have a really good rest. Allow your body to adjust to being pregnant and to build some strength. Hopefully you'll soon be feeling fit for work. But if you're not, that's nothing to be ashamed of or feel guilty about.

Take medical advice. Rest.

Thank you.

For context I’ve not been signed off before so don’t have an absence issue.

First pregnancy I struggled through with work despite sickness, long commute and work generally being rubbish until 28 weeks, when I was signed off until I could take mat leave at 29 weeks. I ended up in the hospital twice around the time I left work.

Second pregnancy very early on I went to the doctor for medication I had eventually got in first pregnancy after the hospital visits, and when it didn't work well I went back again, second medication sorted it and with no time off other than consultant appointments until 36 weeks.

Listen to the Dr and don't be afraid to stand up for yourself and your health. With your first pregnancy its really hard as you don't know if what you are experiencing is 'normal' and you are just being pathetic and everyone else manages, or if you have something seriously wrong. It turns out my body just doesn't manage pregnancy at all well. Fortunately we always planned to stop at 2!

I’ve been off the last month of my pregnancy. Approx 13-17 weeks.
I don’t have HG but have been exhausted. Vomiting and faint with migraines.
I was wfh and they started getting funny about it-we work in a huge office and I was terrified of being unwell when in, or when out visiting which I did 2-3x a week.
They were unsupportive so I went off and plan to continue to do so after this point until it’s resolved.
Sometimes it’s okay to put yourself first.
My first pregnancy was a breeze, this one not so much.
No one should judge you for being off and if they do they’ve had it easy with theirs comparatively or they’d only have empathy for you.

And also, if you have been signed off by a Doctor and told you are unfit for work your employer may not want you in the building for health and safety /insurance type reasons.

And if you feel unwell when laying down its probably reflux not just nausea, if you still have the problem later then medication can help, in the mean time trying sleeping propped up with pillows, don't eat anything before bed, anything acidic, coffee, chocolate, anything spicy. Basically anything interesting, don't eat or drink it. I spent first half of first pregnancy largely eating Wotsits. I don't recommend it at all but baby was 9lb 11oz so clearly wasn't malnourished!

I was signed off for pretty much the whole of my last pregnancy 🤷🏻‍♀️ It was one of those things, I was deemed too unwell to work and baby was more important. I’m glad I followed advice as even with it she was still a preemie, it could’ve been much worse if I’d tried to battle through

Thank you all- it’s making me feel a lot less guilty about being signed off.

I think there’s an element of the pregnancy that doesn’t feel real to me yet. So feel like I’m being signed off with a grotty stomach flu when my instinct is to push through!

Currently laid here with horrible stabbing pains in my cervix ... no sign of any blood though it’s so weird!

Please listen to your doctor. So often, women are ignored and I love that your doctor has listened to you and has signed you off. And I love that your DH is supportive.

Don't worry about what others think. Opinions are like arseholes. Everyone has one but they don't need to be seen! Put yourself and baby first. You're not driving of or the girl getting out of PE because of her period. You're growing a human and your body is telling you to rest right now.

Also, pregnancy is like periods (and pains). Our bodies react differently. And we react differently in each pregnancy. Both my pregnancies were vastly different. The first I was fine until 32 weeks and then everything was awful, the second my.morning sickness was terrible but after 12 weeks all was excellent. So please.dont compare yourself with other pregnant women in your workplace.

I was signed off in my first pregnancy because of appalling nausea and the inability to eat anything proper. Take the sick leave, your baby is worth it. My second pregnancy I wasn’t convinced I was pregnant as I had no symptoms until I ended up with raging spd and had to be signed off and start Mat leave early. Do whatever you need for your growing baby. Congratulations.

A doctor has signed you off as not fit to work. I “soldiered on” during my pregnancy and honestly - I wouldn’t do it again.

Look after yourself, first and foremost.

I've not had horrendous morning sickness but my work colleague did and was signed off. Everyone's pregnancy is different so please don't feel guilty xx

I was off work for most of my pregnancy. I was sick all the way through - though not bad enough for hospital. To top it off i had SPD/PGP from 8 weeks and was on crutches early on.

Listen to your doctor. They don't dish out sick notes for no reason.

I took 2 weeks off on early days on all my pregnancy's. I was so tired and feeling sick, I basically slept for two weeks then felt much better and was back to work ft with no time off for rest of pregnancy

I was off for 7 weeks when I was pregnant (I did have HG). I did not give a shit about being "that girl". I heard so many times that "you're not ill; you're pregnant".

You shouldn't either worry either. You're ill. You need to take it easy. Your doctor knows what he's talking about. Pregnancies are different for everyone. Some have it easy, some have it hard. It's just the way it is. Not your fault.

1st pregnancy barely worked off from 28 weeks. Fast forward to baby 3 worked till the day I was booked in! Listen to your body!!!!!

What a lovely GP. My equally lovely GP signed me off for a month. I don't feel the least bit guilty as atm I feel I've achieved something with my day if I've showered/moved from bed to sofa/sat in the garden for a bit...like a pp, horrendous morning sickness but not quite bad enough for hospital.

Everyones body reacts to pg differently and (to me it seems) pretty randomly - eg you might be young and fit like Kate Middleton and be floored by hyperemises. Or you could be 45 and think its the menopause then be all "omg i'm 5 months pg" how did I not notice.

YANBU stay away from work, the doctor is the professional in this situation not your boss or colleagues. This is from someone who travelled and worked all over the country until 36 weeks and had DS at 36+5. I did get pelvic issues late on but generally had a fine pregnancy. I wouldn't budge anyone taking time off of that's what their doctor says to do!

Begrudge

Get signed off and relax!! Your baby and body are so much more important. Take it easy and get back to work when you feel fit enough! X

HG doesn't always kick in straight away. If nausea and dizziness are and issue right now, in this heat, I'd be glad to be off.

And this from someone in their 2nd HG pregnancy

I’m literally sprawled out on my bed with a mega fan pointing at me and a bucket!
Nibbling on ginger biscuits and avocado (only things not making me 🤢)

I’m really starting to worry about my weight too! I’d just lost 7lbs due to stress (and didn’t have it to lose really) and now I’m barely eating.

My BMI is tottering at around 20 so appreciate it’s not ‘too’ low- but I’m looking very thin and not feeling very sturdy!
Worried that it the nausea keeps on like this I’ll waste away 🤢

I didn’t have any sickness or anything, oh except tiredness in any of my pregnancies. I know I was damn well lucky! I wouldn’t look at anyone thinking they are putting it on, I just look at them them thinking ‘I’m so glad that wasn’t me!’. (Being sick scares me🙈).
OP take as much time off as you need and 🖕to anyone who thinks any different. Your health is way more important than comparing which pregnant employees are managing to get into work or not. Hope
You feel better soon. Oh and a friend found those travel sickness bands helped with her sickness, I don’t know if they did or was a placebo🤷🏻‍♀️But thought I’d suggest them.