To think some men are just vile

[ThelmaTurtle]

Was just walking home from work when a group of 'men' started discussing between themselves the size of my breasts (her in the blue top, hers are massive etc...).

I was very obviously within hearing distance waiting to cross a road and it made me so uncomfortable being spoken about like I'm not even there/just a piece of meat for them to ogle at.

No I didn't say anything, I wanted to but it's intimidating when you're on your own so I just carried on walking.

I know it's not an uncommon occurance but I just needed to rant because it's so fucking rude!

AIBU to think a lot of 'men' are just disgusting? It's like they are just genuine bafoons who don't know how to act appropriately in public.

Generally speaking, are women just the more pleasant, thoughtful and considerate sex? Or is it just bad luck that I don't seem to have encourted as many arsehole women in my life? Is it bad parenting? Of course a lot of it is down to the society we live in I understand but how come some of them don't end up like that?

I have a H who is lovely and who I know would never in a million years act that way but I have certainly come across more 'men' like the ones described above than ones like my H unfortunately.

@TinklyLittleLaugh

I've been in a similar position to the one that waiter was in (mid 20s male, customer-facing job, drunken middle-aged women). The leering and the groping made me feel very uncomfortable. Obviously I couldn't say anything without risking being complained about for rudeness. I'm glad you and your friends realised and stopped. Even though (unlike many women) I was never in fear of physical harm, it was still an unpleasant experience.

While some men will behave boorishly, even when sober; once alcohol is involved, women become just as bad. Neither is acceptable.

"Men are generally ok when not in a pack"

Online dating says otherwise.

I doubt that we'll ever get rid of male entitlement.

Also, you'll notice as you get older that a lot of abusive men have female friends, because they show their charming face. That's what makes women not report because no one would believe it of them.

The male oxfam workers, who traded aid/food for sex were mostly married men.

How, many rapists have lots of members of their family and their girlfriends/family saying what a fantastic person they are?

Education is partly the key.

Women can be just as bad in packs. Like hen parties...we get lots of those and see them chasing men around wolf whistling and the rest. `They can be grim also.

I think there is a vast difference.
I've never felt threatened by any woman, ever. If a woman attacked me I can fight back and have a good chance of getting away relatively unscathed. The same is not true if it was a man.
It is ridiculous to suggest it is.
Why is rape so high if this is the case? Women would just simply say no and walk away. I can't believe people anticipating the 2.
The ops is not talking about someone talking behind your back. She is taking
about open aggression and belittling of a minority group.

Its not easy for a woman to pull a group of men up about it.
When I was younger I did and ended up getting spat on by the twat as he raised his fist trying to assault me. All this because I declined his offer of a shag.

One of the worst to happen to me because it was very insipid - walking along a city centre street, on lunchbreak from work, chatting with a female friend. Passed 3 youngish blokes in suits - one of them stepped in front of us and said "how much?". Chortle, chortle, snigger, snigger.

I am very aggressive when roused, and only didn't say anything because was with friend, who is milder.

So all the people saying women can be just as vile.....are you seriously telling me that groups of / individual women are hurling abuse and obscenities at men and boys to such an extent that nearly every male in the UK will have experienced it at least once in their lifetime?

Give over

Yeah, the majority of men are vile

Get a group of men together and you may well get what Donald Trump excused as 'locker room talk' when he was recorded admitting that he grabs women 'by the pussy'. I'm not saying that he's anything like a nice person or a decent bloke (quite the opposite), but the point he was making was a valid one and it's this: that even otherwise decent men can sometimes be drawn into this kind of banter, or at least be guilty of not putting a stop to it when they get in a group in an all-male environment (such as the men's locker room). My DH hates this kind of sexist, belittling talk about women and I've seen him walk away from conversations in bars or with groups when the conversation has turned unpleasant, but he's the first to admit that you get a group of men together and some of the stuff that comes out of their mouths can be pretty vile. Of course, that's true of women too, but this kind of on-street sexism and objectifying is pretty much a male thing IME.

iloveruby I dont actually see women hurling abuse they are usually much more subtle but from working in various roles I've seen women comment and use vile and abusive language frequently. This seems to occur across age groups. I've also seen women groping men when drunk and have been spat at and threatened for doing my job. I wont say men are unfairly done by there's plenty of vile men but women can more than hold their own.

I walk the same way home from work every day and there's an oldish man that I pass every time.

He very clearly looks at my breasts when be passes me and then turns around to see my arse too. It makes me sick.

But I'm too much of a wuss to say anything

@Singletomingle is that why men are raped and sexually assaulted at the same rate as women?

iloveruby men are obviously much more violent but the post isnt about rape its about vile behaviour which is what I was commenting on. In the case of vile behaviour, comments and groping then yes women are just as bad if not worse.

It's a male bonding ritual. The woman/girl is almost irrelevant, they are showing off to each other. "Look lads, at how I intimidated that lone female. Yes, my balls are huge."

We used to have passes to Monkey World. The pack behaviour is eerily similar. And that's it will probably never be socialized out of humans, it's ingrained. Most men in mixed groups or alone are fine. But only a very small minority would tell an all male group not to talk badly about women.

Yes,it's the pack animal thing I think, men are so very stupid at times.
So when the comments about your nice boobs were said, it's just a normal thing to those thicko's.to see women as boobs,bum, and legs etc.They are likened to a pack of hyena's.