Can’t stop worrying about DD weight

[Napqueen1234]

Advice please. DD is and always has been 91st centile +. Now 2 and easily 37lb+. Super active, healthy home cooked food, treats v occasional but not often at all. Doesn’t have pudding at nursery has fruit instead. There’s not an awful lot I can do to help decrease her weight. Trouble is she’s gone from cute chubby baby to gorgeous but quite chubby toddler and I worry I’m setting her up for health issues. Anyone in a similar position that resolved itself? When I say active she walk/runs everywhere park at least daily + other activities, in nursery which is v active full time. I just notice she is considerably bigger than other children her age and it causes me no end of worry.

Oh OP, please don’t beat yourself up! You have not failed your child. Please, please get some medical advice. The BMI for children is a screening tool for growth awareness. Children who are at extremes should be looked at by a medical professional in case there is a medical cause for the weight gain/loss. Children’s growth matters, it can be indicative of other issues. This is the charity trying to raise awareness:
icosep.org/

And remember, information is power. Once you know something you can do something about it.

Oh I really don't think you need to worry about this as much as you are OP. Just keep the food/activity log and take it to the 2 year check.

No OP, do worry about this and seek medical advice. If a baby dropped two centiles, it would be a cause for worry. It doesn’t mean the baby is necessarily unwell but it’s a warning sign to check. If a young child 2+ is obese it is a warning sign to check. This warning sign (as well as height being over the 97th centile) is less well known, but no less important.

Oh Op sorry you are so upset, you sound like a great, caring Mum. Don’t be hard on yourself.

Just a thought - does your DD spend much time with her grandparents or anyone else when you’re not there? My daughter goes to my in-laws twice a week and I ended up having to be really clear what she wasn’t allowed to eat as she would come home and just want biscuits or crisps...they’d been giving her them if she refused to eat her lunch, I think all grandparents are a little guilty of indulging their grandkids but once I’d said it was making my life harder they were great and understanding and now only give her occasional treats x

All three of mine put on no weight between their 2nd and 3rd birthdays, but grew much taller. They went from really quite chubby toddlers to perfectly average preschoolers. Now, aged 11,9 and 6, they are all lean and active, with healthy appetites. I think seeing your HV or GP would reassure you though. It sounds like you are aware and taking steps which is a good part of the battle.

Are you white? Those child weight scales aren't very accurate for people who aren't.

I mean the centile charts for weight and height

OP, you haven’t failed her - you have caught the problem at the best time.
She is very overweight, so she clearly eats too much (and secondarily doesn’t get enough exercise).
Have a critical look at all snacks - does she need them, how much and what!
then drinks and portion size
we are do used to obesity that a normal weight kid looks too thin for us. keep that in mind
also, get a GP appointment and see if you can get a nutritionist referral

I seriously think you need to not obsess and listen to forum advice about young children’s weight and shape. Either get professional advice because there’s a real issue or just get on with doing the right thing. A strong focus on weight and as hoc food restrictions in young children is not safe. (Obviously restriction of sweets, crisps, biscuits, fruit, fizz is reasonable).

My youngest was 9lb 13oz at birth. Stayed at top of centile charts through toddlerhood, was a very rounded pre-school child with creases in her legs and beautiful dimpled cheeks. Dropped quite dramatically to below 10th centile by year four such that she was investigated for lymphoma etc. Ended up as a 4’11” size 4-6 adult who is very well proportioned.

@Greeve 99th percentile is A LOT. its weight for height, it has very little to do with heritage/skin colour!

Hi al thanks for your responses. I’m keeping a food diary until the HV appointment next week and will ask for a dietician referral if they are concerned. DH as I was getting in a tizz today took his own measurements and this morning DD was 91cm instead of the 87 cm I measured yesterday (are kids taller in the morning?! Insane growth spurt?!) So that puts her at 91st centile for height and 98th for weight so not such a huge discrepancy but still obviously a concern. Will let you know how it goes. Thanks again

To reassure you both my daughters were 98th centile babies and vast as toddlers, all home cooked food, no suger , exercise too.

My eldest is so lean now at 9, she went from being head and shoulders taller and with so much pudge as a baby and todder to a bean pole! She's got a bit more shape now to her but honestly healthy eating does make for strong taller toddlers

Just keep her away from suger and enjoy it when you cuddle, it won't last for ever if she's like mine who is all knees and elbows now

@Napqueen1234 meassuring kids is tricky! but important -60% of uk adults and 30% of young kids are overweight/obese. we are used to see obesity as normal so the measurements are super important

Everyone is slightly taller in the morning and gets shorter as the day goes on.
My midwife told me a newborn can grow as much as 9 mm a day so as newborns grow than toddlers I would guess a toddler can’t grow that much in a day.

My DD was in the 90th percentile when she was two. She started losing the weight just before starting school. She's now 12 and just below average weight for her age/height etc.

meassuring kids is tricky! but important

Well someone should’ve mentioned that to my HV who constantly told me my son was VERY HEAVY. When I said ‘but he’s in proportion for his height, isn’t he?’ She said ‘oh, we don’t measure height’. So it was all bloody useless.

My two DC have always tracked on the 97th centile since birth. Now they're 13 and 8 they're still far, far taller than their peers; we just made large children. Neither is overweight, they're very long and lean like me. They put weight around their middles every so often right before a growth spurt and then seem to even out. I never gave a lot of thought to their height/weight as babies because they were both just sturdy looking things who ate good diets.

OP you know what you're doing with her diet, you know how to keep her healthy in terms of activity, give yourself a little break and remember that you're doing just fine with her. If she's carrying extra weight, stressing out about it won't fix it; changing activity levels and snacks/diet in a healthy way will set her up for a lifetimes positive relationship with food. Give yourself some credit because you sound lovely.

My DS has always been around 98th for height and weight he's absolutely solid (he's 4) can't pinch a scrap anywhere on him yet if I put him into the BMI calculator he's classed as overweight 🤷‍♀️ I don't want to be in denial about it but I can't see that there's anything wrong. Surely if they are equal for height and weight they're ok?

@Merryoldgoat the focus on weight without height in the uk is baffling. weight measured without height is pretty pointless

Well yes. But try telling that to an HV (not a general fan).

My first son was 11lb and 60cm at birth - of course he was going to be big but getting them to understand that seemed impossible.

the focus on weight without height in the uk is baffling. weight measured without height is pretty pointless

Absolutely.

When DS2 was at his two year check I remember the HV weighed him and said to DS1 (who had come with us) "Ooh your little brother's a bit chubby isn't he? Does Mummy feed him too many biscuits?" It was the most patronising bullshit I'd ever heard, especially given his height (which wasn't measured at all). He's 8 now and 5 foot 2, and DS1 (13) is 6 foot 2, so clearly height is a factor.

There is so much misinformation on this thread.

If a child (2+) is obese (or underweight) on a BMI calculator for children, which differentiates between male and female and allows you to input the birth date (all of which are true for the NHS calculator) they statistically fall within then group of children whose weight gain (or weight loss) has a medical cause like an endocrine imbalance, thyroid issues. This means that a medical professional should rule out all these causes of weight gain (or loss).

If the child is not obese (or underweight) because of these medical causes, then nutritional advice might be appropriate to avoid some of the medical issues that are associated with being obese (or underweight). Of these children some will change weight without intervention, and some will remain at their obese (or underweight) weight without medical issues.

At that age I would not worry so long as she is active and her food is healthy. All 3 of mine were like this at that age. They tend to concertina. As in they would bulk up a little then have a growth spurt and appear lean again. Mine are older now and the oldest now 13 is v slim. But it sounds like you are doing all the right things.

Thanks for all your responses including those saying get a grip 😂🤦🏼‍♀️ I appreciate it. For those saying it’s v v big and overweight I completely agree on paper and I do agree we normalise obesity. Have attached a couple of pics so you can visually see what she looks like :)