I got drunk knowing I was pregnant.

[DuckingAutocorrect]

The other night I got very drunk knowing I was pregnant.

I've suffered from recurrent miscarriages in the past few years and am on anti depressants because of this.

We'd been having a break from TTC as I wasn't ready to go through it again and had recently felt a lot better in myself. After some time we decided to try again with the backing of the hospital and I got pregnant.

I'm now 7 weeks.

The other night I thought I noticed some blood starting, just a slight hint of pink on the tissue. I panicked. I went out and got so drunk. I'm so annoyed with myself.

I didn't notice any more blood but went to the EPU anyway and have just found out from my repeat blood tests that I haven't miscarried.

I'm so angry with myself. DH was away with work and I haven't told him.

AIBU to not say anything? I thought that was it again. I still don't believe this will come to anything. I just don't dare to hope anymore.

I guess I just saw the blood and thought fuck it, after everything that's happened before but it's no excuse.

I got so drunk when I was pregnant (before I knew) that I fell off a chair, actually I think I was drunk frequently before I knew - partying at a student. DS is fine ❤️

Don’t beat yourself up, move on & congratulations xx

I got pregnant whilst using an iud ( copper 7). I had no idea I was pregnant and it was barbecue season I drank lots for several weekends.

That child is now a barrister- don’t beat yourself up.

Look forward with hope I am surely that one alcoholic night won’t make any difference.

I wouldn’t tell your DH unless you feel you can’t hold on to this secret.

Try not to worry - the society will possibly be worse for you than anything else. I drank a fair bit at around 6/7weeks being unaware and my daughter is a (stealth boast) high achieving, lovely 11 year old. Try to forget about it and I wouldn't tell your husband unless it will help to make you feel better.

*anxiety

It’ll be fine. I’ve had this discussion so often with a very close relative who is a consultant in this field.

I got married right in my fertile window. Then had a week at home and then went away on all
Inclusive honeymoon. Cycles were a bit wonky so packed pads and hoped for the best. Period didn’t show. Mad few weeks with wedding and travel so shrugged it off. Drank a shit ton on honeymoon and over the wedding weekend) I’d been told I was pretty much infertile, so I wasn’t being irresponsible!! Just very realistic!). Felt really ill after coming home and turned out I was 7 weeks pregnant.

On honeymoon I was drinking whatever and whenever. For 2 weeks solid. We’d been trying for 5 years. I’d given up being ‘careful’ about it.

DS (and subsequent dc) are now a lot older and very much okay.

I think it’s unhelpful for posters to post things like the critical times for defects etc due to alcohol - it’s done now, what do you expect OP to do about it? People aren’t advocating that she do it again they’re just quite rightly stating that the chances of anything from this one mistake are very low. Posting diagrams like that are just cruel and unnecessary.

Not cruel and unnecessary when their are other posters saying drinking before 7weeks doesn't affect a baby @bellasblankexpression
I also won't Stfu @GorkyMcPorky
Let me say again my SON has fas. Every day is a struggle for us all because his birth mom drank alcohol when she knew she was pregnant.
I also said I can partly understand why she did it but when op is asking in aibu I think I have just as much right to comment as all the women saying they drank in the early stages of pregnancy and they're children are fine.
I wish you no ill will op. I understand more than many how devastating infertility and miscarriages are. I really hope this pregnancy continues well for you but I cannot sit back and agree with others that it's fine when it's not.

If it helps at all, I was on holiday for 2 weeks. I drank and smoked like a chimney. I found out I was 9 weeks pregnant when I got back (I was on the mini pill so no periods)

I told the midwife at booking in appointment and she said not to worry, it won't have done any harm whatsoever.

At 7 weeks it will have no effect whatsoever, really do not listen to anyone that says it will and dont listen to your little voice telling you you've done harm.
At 7/8/9 weeks, with both pregnancies, I'd done the following..
Drank beer
Flown
Rock climbed
Ran several 5ks
Drank cocktails
Eaten raw seafood, from the beach, in Vietnam.
Trekked round Costa rica
Ride mopeds round Vietnam, and fell off.
Eaten very questionable meat
Drank some more beer, and cocktails..

I'd had miscarriages and like you thought fuck it, there's no point stressing, I didn't want yo dare to hope for an actual baby.. I'll just get on with life for a couple of weeks and see what happens. Both children are wonderful and were very healthy, I carried on as normal.

It will have had no effect. So don't worry, enjoy the next few weeks and what will be will be, but good luck and sticky thoughts for you xx

@Scarfonthestairs I see where you’re coming from and I’m sorry about your son, that must be really tough, but if FAS was caused by one instance of heavy drinking during pregnancy so many more babies would be born with it as evidenced by this thread - many women do not realise they are
Pregnant and drink until they do.
I just think in this instance posting the diagram was a little too far, you could have made your point without it, all it does is give an already anxious OP more anxiety about something she can now do nothing about.

OP - FYI the screen grabbed infographic posted upthread about the effects of FAS isn't particularly scientific. There is no indication about blood alcohol level, volume of alcohol consumed, or duration over which alcohol was consumed which would all be relevant if the information on the graphic was to be read as fact. If you visit the website there is a particularly unscientific, non-medical diagram immediately under the screen grabbed graphic. In no way am I doubting the seriousness of FAS, but for the reasons I've detailed above, I don't think that graphic is relevant.

Be kind to yourself OP. Recurrent miscarriages takes a heavy toll on your health. I really hope this pregnancy goes well

Again, a whole generation of mothers still living, drank throughout their pregnancies (most smoked back then, too)
Okay, we know better now, but your one night of drinking vs my mum's enthusiastic alcohol and nicotine intake throughout both her pregnancies didn't prevent her giving birth to two healthy humans.

Ooops. Edited my post before sending, and just ended up with something that didn't make an actual sentence. Hopefully you got my gist.

I was frantic because I had drunk a lot of wine (a lot!) one night before I knew I was pg. My Dr looked at me with barely controlled rolled eyes and said “how do you think half my patients get pregnant in the first place?”

I am sorry you have had so many distressing miscarriages and all my hopes are pinned on this one sticking for you.

Scarf There is a middle line here. No one on this thread thinks that regular drinking throughout page, or when you know you are of, is on no importance.
You could have addressed other posters more tactfully without guilt tripping the OP.

I drank an entire BOX of wine 5 days before finding out I was pregnant with DS. Was mortified but he is a perfectly lovely 14 year old now.

Please dont beat yourself up. Shit happens, and I hope all goes well for you x

Try to stop being so hard on yourself. I really hope this is the one that sticks for you. Try to be positive, I know how difficult that is. Out of 6 pregnancies I had bleeding with them all. 3 stuck and we lost the other 3.
It's up to you if you tell your dh but I think he, more than strangers on the internet would understand what you have had to survive through and should understand where your head was at that night.

Being gentle on yourself @DuckingAutocorrect .

Youve had a lot of trauma. If this pregnancy is not successful it wont be to that one night .

Please talk to GP & see if you can get some support- this is such a difficult time for you .

I think your question is ‘aibu not to tell my husband about this’....... what are the pros and cons to it for you? I can’t think of any cons if it was me; my husband would make me feel better and reassure me I think. How about you? Anyway you’re not being unreasonable not to tell him and please be kind to yourself, you’re only human and doing your best. Give yourself a break x

Omg most people don't even know they're pregnant at 7 weeks! You'll have done no harm at all. I didn't find out I was pregnant til 14 weeks and I'd had a fair few nights out before that! Most people I know have got drunk when pregnant (admittedly before they found out) and nobody has any issues. But your case is special circumstances! Don't beat yourself up. It will be fine x