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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pleased children are no longer out from dawn until dusk unsupervised

190 replies

rosediamond · 21/07/2019 09:58

I know some people claim they had a brilliant childhood roaming free but I think for the majority of children growing up prior to the late 90s (maybe?) they were pretty dark times.

I’m pleased that children playing without supervision is rare now.

OP posts:
Original poster
rosediamond · 21/07/2019 10:45

That, IAm, is something I think we can all agree on Grin

OP posts:
PortiaCastis · 21/07/2019 10:46

Oh FGS stop winding people up

augustusglupe · 21/07/2019 10:46

They weren’t dark times for me. I was a kid in the early seventies, out all day, friends, long adventure walks, climbing trees, making dens, I loved it!! And my DD was a kid in the mid 90s, when children were still playing out a lot. We were semi rural and although I definitely watched her and always wanted to know where she was, I think she had quite an idyllic childhood. She has fond memories of it.

CodenameVillanelle · 21/07/2019 10:46

I think it’s a sad state of affairs that kids can’t go to the local play park with their friends unsupervised

They can and do! What are you talking about?

SisyphusDad · 21/07/2019 10:47

... but still I survived. I must have been one of the lucky minority.

ChesterDrawsDoesntExist · 21/07/2019 10:47

I live in a village where kids as young as 4 can go across and play on the park whilst mum and dad are inside the home. My own 7 year old is allowed to go to a park 5 streets and a main road away with his 9yo friends and sister. Kids can go to the local pool unsupervised from aged 8.

It's a wonderful thing. There are loads of happy, healthy, safe children running around with the whole village's eyes on them.

Original poster
rosediamond · 21/07/2019 10:47

I’m not winding anyone up portia but if the thread is having that effect on you why not hide it? Because I’m replying to you and it seems a bit pointless.

OP posts:
JonSlow · 21/07/2019 10:47

Lazy journalism at its finest.

Original poster
rosediamond · 21/07/2019 10:48

Ok yes you got me, you’ll be in the daily mail tomorrow Hmm

OP posts:
Wildorchidz · 21/07/2019 10:48

I was a free range 90s kid. I certainly survived but I was wanked at and flashed by dirty old men numerous times

This was me in the 70s. And my sister in the 80s.
We learned a lot mind you

Mrsjayy · 21/07/2019 10:49

Children are still at risk of adults children are abused and neglected all the time by people who are supposed to love and protect them .

anitagreen · 21/07/2019 10:49

I can sort of see what the op means as a kid the amount of situations me and my brothers used to get into just by playing out because we didn't see the danger, we had a forest near our estate that we used to play in that was full of needles and dumped stolen stuff or burnt out cars and we used to play in their all the time could of been struck by a needle or whatever, but it never occurred to us. Another time we went in there and saw some person injecting so we didn't go back to there.
Another time we was playing out on a building site throwing lime sand around and hurt our friends eyes, another time we managed to get our bikes robbed by some older kids but no one cared really at all. We would play in rivers that was dangerous and take ourselves into the sea and see who could go the furthest and not touch the bottom.
I've got two kids aged under 5 and I don't think I'll ever feel okay letting them out to jus bike ride out it's mainly being hit by cars that puts me off I mean peados are online and out and about but it doesn't fear me in a way being knocked down by a car does.
The Roy whiting Cass with Holly I think her name was used to frighten me as that was local down the road to my nans Caravan

Original poster
rosediamond · 21/07/2019 10:49

They are mrsjayy but no one is telling me that child abuse is like it once was. We talk about it, we address it.

OP posts:
colourlessgreenidea · 21/07/2019 10:50

Dark times refers to being at risk from other adults and also at risk from one another. Gangs of kids can quickly turn a bit Lord of the Flies.

Oh, stop it Grin

vodkaredbullgirl · 21/07/2019 10:51

Another 70's 80's child, used to walk home from school in the 70's. In the 80's used to go off for hours on bike rides, through the woods, Come home when hungry and then go back out again.

sheshootssheimplores · 21/07/2019 10:51

Definitely not dark times for me either. Fab times!

anitagreen · 21/07/2019 10:51

Apologies it was Sarah Payne not Holly

HollowTalk · 21/07/2019 10:52

I would have liked Childline when I was young, and I think there were many, many children in that position.

Original poster
rosediamond · 21/07/2019 10:53

You don’t think so?

I had a bit of a weird friendship when I was about 7. This girl had two older sisters and I think they were probably about 9 and 12 but seemed really old to me.

Anyway, my friend persuaded me to pretend we were having an argument and I went along with it. Her sisters thought it was real and I remember being backed into a wall by what seemed a huge, huge gang of girls. I still remember how terrified I was.

Also got pinned down and my trousers and pants pulled off me by some boys.

It was fucking horrible.

OP posts:
BazaarMum · 21/07/2019 10:53

Almost everyone has so far focused on death by murder/accident as the only risks.

But what about other risks that can mar a childhood? It was pretty much the norm for us girls in the 80s/90s to be flashed at/wanked at/felt up by opportunists. It was minimised and joked about by adults and kids alike. Or we were blamed for being on our own in the wrong place. As I mentioned in my earlier post I know at least two children very seriously sexually assaulted or raped, in public places, not remote woodlands.

Kids being hit by cars was also hugely higher, by government stats.

My kids certainly don’t spend their days cooped up on screens! But based on my experiences they won’t be roaming the streets until they are old enough to be very streetwise.

cantfindname · 21/07/2019 10:54

Ridiculous post and a few ridiculous replies.

My kids regularly thank me for their feral childhood and the freedom they had playing out and even -gasp- camping out. They are now in the forties and my G'son has much the same life.

As a child I lived the same way, out at first light and only coming home for food or drinks until it got dark.

Mine had limits put in place, I had to know where they were and they had to be back at a certain time, plus a very few places were banned. Other than that they roamed free over the countryside, parks and the rest of the village.

Original poster
rosediamond · 21/07/2019 10:54

I know Bazaar I feel the same

OP posts:
ContactLight · 21/07/2019 10:55

YABU. Of course they weren't 'dark' times - you make it sound like the Dark Ages.

More children are killed in road accidents each year than have ever been abducted/murdered while out playing. And roads these days are far more dangerous and busy now than they were years ago.

pepperpot99 · 21/07/2019 10:55

Well if gangs are what freak you out , OP, I'm sure you'll agree that the youth gang culture has grown exponentially in the last 10 years which makes your 'pre late-90s claim' a load of bollocks, really Hmm.

OP what are 'dark times' ? I'd say youngsters becoming addicted to violent video gaming, internet porn and getting obese from lack of exercise - is pretty 'dark'. What is your view of this?

catsnoring · 21/07/2019 10:57

Plenty of local feral kids 'play' in the park and alleyways in our town, always unsupervised and usually far from their own homes, unless you count supervision to include when the police invariably turn up.

Its the local residents it dark times for, especially now schools have broken up.

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