Family think I'm bad for leaving child at school 10mins before door opens

[pointbla]

I take my year 4 child early 10 mins before the school doors open and leave him there. I have another child to take to another school. He's 9 , I see no problem with it , other children are there too. Also, I don't regularly do that just occasionally.
My family seem to think this is very bad and I am putting my child at risk as the kids mess about. AIBU?

Drogosnextwife

Well, go on, then - why?

It’s fine OP. When I was that age I walked to school by myself as did many of my classmates!

When I was that age I walked to school by myself as did many of my classmates!

She could always just let him do that.

Your post is incredibly confusing, a quick read makes it look as though you're leaving a 4 year old

Don't read quick then, helps with comprehension.

I walked to school at that age and the only reason my own child didn't was because it was a fair distance. Nothing wrong here for me.

That would be the same as this. I would be leaving my child, not unsupervised, at my own risk, but co-opting supervision for my child from a specific person without their permission.

I honestly think you are now looking for any way in which you can to justify you are 'right'. In this situation the Op is fine to leave her child should something terrible befall him I'm sure she would feel even worse that you are making her feel now. However given that this is a seriously unlikely situation and the fact is he is left for 10 minutes only on some occasions then I don't see why you feel the need to keep labouring your point?

I think 9 is fine.

I honestly think you are now looking for any way in which you can to justify you are 'right'.

I am right. This is exactly what she’s doing.

I don’t want to make her feel bad. No interest in that. But if people keep coming up with spurious reasons why what is blatantly true isn’t, then I will keep pointing out the obvious.

She could always just let him do that.

What if she did that and some days they walked quickly meaning he still arrived 10 minutes early on occasion? Wouldn't that just lead to the same situation and would the Op still be considered to be taking the piss? Or would it not count as she had no control over what time he arrived?

@AudacityOfHope. 😆😆 ...not a crack den 😂

There are MNs having vapours and spasms all over the place that other schools may do it differently to their PFB's school
Our KS2 (age 8-11) only has door open for 10 mins, DCs wait outside school (not even in playground!) and are encouraged to get to school early to wait for doors to not be late...so 5-15mins (most DC walk themselves here) All without teacher supervision! Or any angsty "but think of the children"...
Some parents wait too but not most as many children walk to from school with friends at that age - sage area.

There's no way 300+ cars can get through this no through route residential area to park in school park or even nearby within that time! (Other arrangements see my earlier post)

None of that is CF nor neglectful behaviour by parents. It's about sensible children that can stand chatting for short period with their friends without going wild and graffitting the church doors whilst they wait! Same sensible behaviour they have in school.

Your post is incredibly confusing, a quick read makes it look as though you're leaving a 4 year old

It really isn’t. Pay a bit more attention when you are reading instead of turning it around and blaming the OP.

What if she did that and some days they walked quickly meaning he still arrived 10 minutes early on occasion? Wouldn't that just lead to the same situation and would the Op still be considered to be taking the piss? Or would it not count as she had no control over what time he arrived?

She would obviously have some control over what time she let him leave the house, wouldn’t she? In a catchment area (assuming she lives only a few minutes from school) he could simply be told to wait outside the gates. That would be her choice.

Not really the point here.

Your post is incredibly confusing, a quick read makes it look as though you're leaving a 4 year old

No it absolutely isn’t. I can’t believe the amount of people that thought he was 4. It’s perf clear how old he is.

Perfectly not perf

I'm amazed anyone thinks you are unreasonable.

At our school, from year 3, the kids are expected to get into their classrooms on time and are let out into the playground at home time without parents being at the door to collect.

Our school is also a community. We look out for each other's kids.

OP, are there other parents in the playground who know he's alone, in case of emergencies?

That's what I would do to safeguard. But I certainly have no problem with a 9 year old in the playground alone for 10 minutes.

I would certainly let my kids stay home alone or go to the corner shop at 9.

My eldest is 7 and I'd let her go to the corner shop (it's literally around the corner).

If a kid broke their leg in the playground, teachers would get involved whether a parent is there or not. Such a commotion would have the head teacher out to see what was going on.

DC primary asks that they are not dropped before 10 minutes before bell because the play ground is not supervised before that. I think they were getting some seriously early drop offs - 30/40 minutes.

However most kids are walking in -and sometimes walking in younger siblings from yr4 onwards. I'd let mine do that as well if we lived closer and didn't have to cross duel carriageway.

I don't think we are every more than 10 minutes early - and I've always dropped at gate - initally as younger child had to go around back of building to different entrance now because current primary child wants me to.

Unless the school has expressed concerns about it I'd ignore.

My kids school you can sign a permission slip for them to go to and from school on their own from the start of year 4. I have a younger one too, but signed so I can take her to the lower school yard, and he goes off to the far side of the school to the big yard, sometimes as long as twenty or thirty minutes early.

Barbie222

spot on

Same here and also (clutches pearls) learning to sort their own disagreements out independently, without mum or dad hovering over them.

nice try
but you do realise that kids don't have to be left in the streets to do that, don't you?

It's fine to leave a 9 year old unsupervised for 10 minutes!

Plenty of 9 year olds walk to and from school, play out, go to the park etc.

BUT THEN WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM @AbbyHammond

I can see these ridiculous parents moving into uni halls to keep their precious from the ferals!!
No wonder we are seeing all these entitled useless teens and young adults, let your kids breathe.

No different to letting a 9 year old play outside unsupervised, I'd say.

I am glad I live in Scotland where they supervise the playground for 15 mins in the morning

I live in Scotland, they don’t do that where I am.

Parents of primary 1-3 (aged 5-8 ish) can go in and wait in the playground. Parents of primary 4 and above are not allowed into the playground and can drop off from about 20 minutes before the bell.

None of the playgrounds are supervised until about 5 minutes before the bell.

If a 9 year old can’t be left unsupervised for ten minutes in the morning, that’s a worry.

Surely OP can just ask one of the other regular parents waiting there to keep an eye or be his go to person in case he needs something.
A whole lotta fuss over nothing.

OP it is fine, at that age lots of the DC arrive early to chat with their mates before the bell goes. I think it will give him confidence.
He is 9, he is on the school grounds with probably 20 other children at least.