To wonder if freezing someone out is bullying?

[AllPembrok]

There is this parent in our school community. Our dc are in the same year. She must have decided years ago that she hates my guts and simply does not acknowledge me. She is on super friendly terms with everyone else but turns away when she sees me and refuses to talk to me. In fact we haven't really ever chatted, other than me trying to say 'hi' or something else friendly if and where appropriate. I bumped into her in town on the weekend and she saw me and turned her back . She is super popular so must be lovely, which is all the more confusing.

AIBU to think this is unnecessary and quite hostile? Why would someone act like this? What could I have possibly done when our kids were in reception to put her nose out of joint to this extent? It makes me feel quite anxious.

Have you ever been treated in this ostentatiously contemptuous way? She literally turns her back whenever she notices me but is so friendly with everyone else...

A friend's DH was having an affair and treating her appallingly.

Friend told me who the OW was, and that her DC went to the same activity as mine. In solidarity I duly gave the deathstare to this woman at every pickup. After about 3 months I found out I had been giving the stink eye to the wrong woman!

Epilogue: friend finally split with ExH and is now happy. ExH married OW who is now my friend, she is very nice (friend says so too). Don't know about mistaken lady, I sometimes wonder if she remembers "strange woman who glares at me although I have never offended her."

The book Queen bee moms & kingpin dads by Rosalind Wiseman might help you get it all in perspective. I had a woman at church (of all places) do this to me and to be honest only thing that worked was giving her the same treatment!

Sorry to hear you have experienced this - as you can see it is quite a common thing

I had similar, queen bee type of mum was v overly friendly at nursery tbh i was partly pleased to have found a mum friend because i struggle a bit with that but she was also v nosey etc and I am v private. She was desperate for our DD to be best friends but when that didn't happen she just blanked me and i believe encouraged others to do the same. Then every time i saw her ahe would loudly go on about her new best friend and how the other mum's DD was now her child's best friend and how wonderful it all was. Fast forward 2 yrs mothers fell out and the other mother and her child left the area.

These people are not worth your time. Eventually as in my example they all turn on each other

I have anxiety and would definitely try and look the other way if I saw someone out and about that I didn't know very well. I would also avoid being chatty with people. I just don't like it. But I am chatty with people I know.

Could it be that she does actually know the other people and just doesn't know you. You might be taking it too personally.