To worry about my 9 month old’s development?

[CathyandHeathcliff]

He’s actually 9 months tomorrow. He crawls, pulls himself up on everything and is cruising the furniture. But he doesn’t appear to respond to his name every time, he can’t clap or wave either. Although he will bang two blocks or cups together, just not his hands.
Both me and his dad have tried modelling clapping and waving, but nothing.
The fact he doesn’t respond to his name worries me too, as he’s starting nursery in September.

He smiles at people and will giggle if you tickle him or if his dad throws him up in the air, but is quite moody at home usually, whinges when he’s playing alone or when I leave the room. Also now has a SCREAM when we take something off him or do something he doesn’t want us to, like wipe his face & hands.

Should I be concerned?

(Please be gentle with me, I have anxiety and do tend to over worry about everything)

Sounds totally normal to me. My DD is 9 months and doesn’t clap or wave yet. She’s also not cruising or crawling yet (although trying hard!) so yours is ahead in that respect! Try not to worry, it’s hard if you’re an anxious person but they all develop at such different rates.

Oh and not playing happily alone is VERY normal! A good sign I would say, they want company and stimulation.

Does he respond to other sounds? Can he hear you?
He sounds ok, can you chat with your HV for reassurance?

I have a son the same age and that sounds perfectly normal. Not all babies develop the same skills at the same time. lots won't be crawling by now.

The scream is a good thing- he's communicating with you, telling you he doesn't like something. My son is also quite clingy, won't really play by himself for long etc and I do not have concerns about him. He only started responding to his name in the last week, and only does it sometimes.

With the best will in the world, you are only ever going to find two sorts of parnts on a parneting forum; those who gave birth to an advanced genius, and those with horror stories re SEN to regale.

Ask your HV, for me its so long ago, when do they do hearing tests? I vageuly remember those with a baby on the lap.

Sounds perfectly normal to me. I think its a bit early to clap or wave I thought that was around 12 months

@Vibiano yes he responds to other sounds, he always turns towards music if it’s playing on the radio or if he hears songs on the TV or if I sing to him.

All sounds totally normal to me. My DD was later to clap and wave and often ignored me when I said her name (still does!) and she's totally fine.

Normal.

Where on earth are you getting the idea that any of what you have written isn't normal? That sounds like most typical 9 month old babies.

9 months is around the time where separation anxiety really kicks in so they can get pretty whingey. It's draining but normal.

I worry about autism a lot, as I have mild Aspergers which I’m looking into more now as an adult.

@CathyandHeathcliff
Sounds like all is well then tbh.
My eldest took ages to crawl and walk but I think it was because she put all her effort into talking.
Sounds like you have the opposite!
Have a chat with HV when you take him to be weighed, I'm sure she will be able to reassure you

Sounds normal, my 10 mo has just started clapping and responding her name more consistently (still not every time). I go to a baby group where we sing a song about waving every week and everyone waves at the babies, only one waves back and he is over 1 year old.

@MyOpinionIsValid the hearing test is done at birth now. Can request another one in Audiology and it should be more in depth than the old health visitor one.

OP, he sounds fine to me. Wait and see where he’s at in a couple of months or ask the HV for a quick chat.

eavers yes I have a 2.5 year old and a 1 year old and both started clapping and waving around their first birthdays. They were both early crawlers and walkers (DC1 walked at 8 months DC2 at 10 months).

Whichever baby book you are reading OP I would chuck it out.

Sounds very normal. They don't all get skills at exactly the same time :)

My 11mo doesn't seem to know his name, but can identify other things e.g. looks in the right direction for mummy, daddy, drink. Can clap and wave and did both before 9 months, but his older brother didn't until later. Neither of them were pointing (or understood others pointing) until over a year despite various milestone things having it listed.

Normal for them to be quite whingy at this age and be anxious about being alone. And the scream is just the very beginning of toddler tantrums. Unfortunately normal too :)

Check out websites such as Bounty and similar as they do 'milestone checklists' you can use as a rough guide. It sounds like your son is slightly ahead in many respects!

Have a chat with your HV at the 10 month check but it sounds like your baby is doing really well. For contedt my 11 month old claps, waves, says no and tries to say cat (she says 'ca' at the cat repeatedly), she bangs toys together and all that jazz. She rolls and sits but refuses to crawl and really cant be arsed with standing or pulling herself up. They all go at different paces. As long as you have no concerns about his hearing or vision then I would worry. Keep modelling and he will pick it up when he's ready.

Sounds totally normal. Few babies hit every single milestone at exactly the right time - often they are early with a few favourites, a little late with a few others etc. He's moving and trying to communicate with you and that's great! The frustration is also typical of this age, they are so keen to be talking, walking and doing more but aren't physically there yet, it will improve.

Clapping waving and responding to name is more a 12 month milestone as far as I remember

I think that sounds pretty normal OP.
But if you're worried contact your HV.

Check out websites such as Bounty and similar as they do 'milestone checklists' you can use as a rough guide. It sounds like your son is slightly ahead in many respects!

I suspect this is exactly what OP has done, and what has worried her. Those websites, despite their little 'all children are different' disclaimers have a very certain 'your child will be doing this' tone that can make you feel terrible if they aren't (even though the websites don't agree with each other - if you look at clapping, for instance, there's a very wide range of when they 'should' be doing it online, I think in part because some of them are talking about babies doing it just to do it, and others are talking about the more advanced skill of clapping to a song or to mean 'well done').

For what it's worth, OP, DS was doing exactly the same things as yours at 9 months, and he's now 12 months and claps, waves, points, consistently responds to his name, and has a couple of words. It all suddenly came at once.

I don't know if I just have a dullard baby and have surrounded myself with other parents of dullards, but those milestone lists have also seemed quite optimistic compared to the actual babies I know. If I look at the ones for what DS 'should be doing now' they all go on about walking (again, with a little disclaimer about how not all walk at a year, but a definite tone that they should be), but I only know two babies of DS's age out of about 20 that were walking before 1. When I went to baby groups with DS when he was 9 months it wasn't exactly a riot of clapping and waving among the other babies his age (though some definitely could do it), whatever the list said 'should' be happening by then. You often see 6 months given as a normal age for crawling on those lists, but DS did at nearly 8 months and was one of the first. Again, this is all very anecdotal but I don't know many babies who weren't 'behind' on those lists for something or other.

Does he try to copy you? How does he play? If you’re worried speak to your GP - your having Aspergers might get them to try to assess your DS a bit faster.

My 1 year old has only just started clapping. He didn't wave till 11 months. He does respond to his name sometimes. I really wouldn't worry. My ds has never been much of a talker but he walked at 10 months. Suddenly he is babbling a lot and saying words. All children develop slightly differently.

Sounds totally normal to me, in fact cruising before 9 months is quite early is it not? A quick chat or visit with your HV might help put your mind at rest if your still feeling anxious about it.

He's fine.

My 9mo comes to his own name but also when I call the dog 🤷🏻‍♀️

You'll have your date for your 12 month review soon so see how many of the things he can do the week before that.

If he's banging blocks he's on the right track. Mine claps and then won't clap for a couple of weeks, waves at the dog non stop, but not at people that wave at him. He can't cruise but crawls at top speed. They do things at their own pace as and when they feel like it.

If you want to feel as though your doing something, play games to refine motor skills by getting him to pick things up with his pincer grip and find things under cups, play peekaboo, shape sort ect. We also go to baby sensory and the like which focuses development via play.