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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wonder whether this is creepy

34 replies

Chochito · 15/07/2019 15:33

Started seeing a new guy recently who seems lovely. We've been out 3 times. He seems interesting, funny, hardworking, polite, respectful...

He is a hairdresser. He has paid me some compliments on my hair. Then said later, via a WhatsApp, "your hair is all mine." I thought it was a little odd and just changed the subject.

What does the MN hive mind think?

OP posts:
pollypenguin01 · 15/07/2019 15:35

He’s trying to be funny? But obviously being really cringe!

I’m not sure I would think it was a red flag or anything tho Hmm

Original poster
Chochito · 15/07/2019 15:39

Thanks! Yeah it was a relatively serious chat we were having when he came up with that but he may have been trying to joke, that's the problem with WhatsApp texts...

OP posts:
Dieu · 15/07/2019 16:09

I'd have laughed at that.

VivienneHolt · 15/07/2019 16:16

Cringe and awkward but not necessarily creepy (unless it becomes a weird pattern!)

BowiesJumper · 15/07/2019 16:43

Does he not mean he wants to cut it when you need to have it done? Bit random.

Rachelover40 · 15/07/2019 18:23

I don't think it's creepy but do ask him what he meant. It was probably a kind of compliment.

Original poster
Chochito · 15/07/2019 19:02

That's true BowiesJumper , but I quite like my current hairdresser (as a hairdresser, not as a boyfriend...)

AIBU to think it's awkward if your boyfriend cuts your hair?

OP posts:
UnapologeticallyUnsociable · 15/07/2019 19:42

I have visions of him cutting your hair off in your sleep and fashioning a wig out it which he wears when you're not there (silence of the lambs style) 😂😂😂

herculepoirot2 · 15/07/2019 19:46

Like Ross Gellar flirting with the pizza delivery lady.

Original poster
Chochito · 15/07/2019 19:47

UnapologeticallyUnsociable That hadn't even occurred to me... BlushShockBlush

herculepoirot2 Grin Grin Think I'd quite like to date Ross. Grin

OP posts:
UnapologeticallyUnsociable · 15/07/2019 19:53

Haha, sorry! I'm sure he's no Buffalo Bill but it is a bit of a weirdo comment from someone you've only been on 3 dates with. Like you say, might have been a joke that doesn't translate over text x

TroysMammy · 15/07/2019 19:56

Is he a League of Gentlemen fan? Papa "you're my wife now" Lazarou. It sounds as if he's trying to be funny and failing a bit.

funnylittlefloozie · 15/07/2019 19:56

I would see it as a joke that fell a bit flat over text, nothing more. I think i would LOVE a hairdresser boyfriend!

KurriKurri · 15/07/2019 19:59

I think he's saying he really likes your hair and so when it needs to be cut he'd like to do it (I guess hairdressers see some hair and think 'I'd really like to cut/style that') and because you are dating he's claiming first dibs on your hair. Or something.

Yup - now I think about it, bit weird.

Be glad you aren't dating a plumber 'your toilet is all mine' is even weirder.

herculepoirot2 · 15/07/2019 20:22

Chochito

Gas smells.

😂

Sparkletastic · 15/07/2019 20:24

I would take it in the sense that he wants to be your hairdresser as well as boyfriend

mumwon · 15/07/2019 20:44

at least he isn't a plastic surgeon!

Original poster
Chochito · 15/07/2019 21:17

KurriKurri Yeah, me too... Blush

OP posts:
Thefemalekeithrichards · 15/07/2019 21:26

It’s just a ‘hair dressery’ thing to say, not creepy at all -he has more than likely been ‘mentally styling’ your hair and I think you are really lucky as he will probably do a brilliant job as a ‘labour of love’ so to speak...

Original poster
Chochito · 15/07/2019 22:10

Thanks Thefemalekeithrichards but he says he likes it how it is. Confused

OP posts:
Original poster
Chochito · 15/07/2019 22:18

So here's the Whatsapp conversation, in case MN can read into it more deeply than I can (thinking it's probably OK but conditioned by MN to think it could be a little creepy, depending on intended tone).

I'm translating into English so apologies if it sounds a little stilted or unusual:

Me: sends photo of me & 2 friends at landmark we were visiting
Him: You are very beautiful, I really like your hair like that.
Him: Like that how you have it.
Him: And I want to see you now
Me: Hehe I am sends location (am not in same country as him right now)
Him: I wish I could see you
Me: And I you
Me: What are you doing?
Him: Looking at your photo
Him: Your hair looks really beautiful
Me: Thanks...you don't think to change it at all? (We had been talking a few days before about how when he sees people for the first time he thinks about how to change their hair).
Him: Noooo
Him: But if you want to change it in the future I will do it for you
Me: Really?
Him: Yes
Him: Your hair is all mine
Him: I really like you and I feel myself liking you more and more all the time

Is he sweet and normal? Or is that comment creepy? From typing it out and re-reading it on my phone, I still can't decide.

OP posts:
NoSuchThing · 15/07/2019 22:25

He’s very focused on your hair isn’t he? Like, really focused. Are all your conversations like this?

Original poster
Chochito · 15/07/2019 22:29

NoSuchThing No, otherwise I would find that definitely creepy. Just that one comment. And the first time we met he said I had nice hair (in general conversation about lots of things).

OP posts:
SaucySausageSandwiches · 15/07/2019 22:44

That makes sense in the conversation and I think he’s being quite cute.

NoSuchThing · 15/07/2019 22:45

I reckon it’s probably alright then. Sounds more like he was trying to be funny, and came across a little odd. Text doesn’t always convey the tone of a comment.

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