To be dreading the summer holiday

[BigRedLondonBus]

I feel like an awful mum for saying this but I am really dreading the summer holidays. I have 4 children and I am a single parent (ex is absent) so I am with them all the time as I don’t have any help with them. I am really not sure how I’m going to survive the summer holidays! I am really not looking forward to it as I just know it’s going to be a nightmare. They fight constantly, I won’t have much money to do things either and even on the weekends the house is always a tip because they make so much mess so the holidays will be even worse. Aibu to be dreading it? Is anyone else dreading it?

Ah I think it's sad you feel that way but then I only have one child and a supportive DH so I don't understand the way you feel!

Some tips for you -

Summer reading challenge at library

BOGOF entry into various Merlin attractions on the mcds Happy Meal boxes for cheap day out?

Movies with homemade popcorn and cheap jelly sweets

Bike rides

Park

And definitely make friends with other mums!! They absolutely keep me sane when out and about as their kids play with mine and we just chit chat 😁

It is sad but then I am going to be alone with 4 kids for 6 weeks with no break at all so it is going to be exhausting. School is the only break I get and then I still have a toddler to look after. Children have been at the school for 3 years now and never made friends with any of the mums but then I am an introvert and very shy so I’m not the type who would approach people. Some good suggestions though will be doing a lot of them, we are in London so transport is good, roll on September!

Our summer holidays are 9 looooong weeks long!

I get them to do a wish list at the start - things to do, places to go, things to make etc. Then when we start getting bored and cranky, go to the list for a fresh idea. This year we have stuff like:
Camping
Fishing
Make lemonade
Summer reading challenge (library)
Summer reading/revision (school)
Bike ride to x
Walk to x
Make lemonade
Play date with x
Paddle in lake
Doodle challenge library
Free entertainment in shopping centre

I feel the same, my mum died suddenly last month and she would help me so much with my 2 girls (3 & 7), I'm off work for the summer as mum would have girls while I worked, I'm glad I found some good ideas on this thread.

@BigRedLondonBus those ages are really tough, no wonder your stressing, it's a long time to entertain 4 young ones and having no support is even worse, just think your not alone, think many parents feel like this.

I'm in a similar situation op.

I'm not a lone parent but oh works long hours and doesn't get home till gone 7pm. Not much family round so it's just me and the kids for the whole six weeks.

I have friends but they all work...I'm also an introvert and don't have any mum friends really.

Everything is so expensive...I'm trying to put together a timetable of what we're doing, otherwise it's a nightmare.

I adore the holidays. Playing in the garden, beach, lie ins, craft, kids club.... The sky's the limit!

Playing in the garden, beach, lie ins, craft, kids club.... The sky's the limit!

Yes if you have a garden, live near the beach and can afford a kids club

YANBU. I'm dreading it, my DS age 3.6 is only in a play group 3 mornings a week, but I honestly don't know what I'm going to do with him for 6 whole weeks when everything stops, as I also have DS age 4 months so it's so difficult to cater for the two of them.

Also suffering with terrible anxiety right now as we are waiting to see a paed for DS1 (I suspect he may or may not have ASD) so I'm forever analysing everything he does which is horrible.

He also will not play by himself in the house for love nor money. Anyone else have a 3 year old like this? Tips on encouraging him? He has hundreds of toys but doesn't play with them!

formerbabe yes we live by the beach and have a garden, but the kids club is free, it's a local children's centre.

I will add that I’ve never dreaded it before but this year is our first year with my child diagnosed as type 1 diabetic. No more holiday clubs / play dates at friends houses / being taken out by grandparents etc. That’s all stopped due to the diagnosis and to top it off we can’t afford a holiday either (although even if we could I’d be worried about it now anyway) so it’s me and heather kids all summer too, without a break 😬

You don’t need to stay and be friends at the play dates with your older kids. Usually kids organise who they want to play with themselves and you just text the parent to organise the day and time and drop or host . Won’t they miss their friends if you don’t do this ?

And I find it’s easier to use a calendar to plan things because then it doesn’t seem like such a long thing to get through .

I understand the being an introvert thing because I am too. Is there any nature near you? I find getting out the beach, forest, park is great, especially with a picnic.

I've found a holiday sports club that's affordable...I only want them to go for one or two days but they're both whining and saying they don't want to go. However, I know they'd end up really enjoying themselves. Arrghh, might have to drag them there or bribe them

@Foodtheif that is hard. Are you a member of Diabetes UK? They have a support line and may be able to provide details of support in your area. It's horrible to feel as though you are on your own. Best wishes to you 💐

Hi, no I’m not. Maybe I will look into it but as I don’t drive, finding support is tricky. I will just trickle on and it will be September eventually.......

They never mention their friends outside of school and have equally never been invited to any friends from schools houses.

I absolutely hate the summer holidays.
My kids get up early so it's a very long day I have to fill from 6am til 8pm. It's even worse when the weather's bad.
Im trying to write a list of things to do in and out of the house. Preferably free.
Its lovely to do baking, arts and crafts etc but my kids argue and after 10 mintues they've had enough of that activity and I've still got another 10 hours to fill.
People don't really do play dates round here because they're all in holiday clubs, with grandparents or abroad. They are far too long

Op can I ask why it is you don't have friends with children ? Could it be something to try and change ?

Rputemaster in London is £1.50 and free
For kids under 11, no 11 route is better than a tour bus.
Hackney city farm
Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park
Coram's fields
Museums

London is the best place for free places with kids

People don't really do play dates round here because they're all in holiday clubs, with grandparents or abroad

I can relate to this. I'm sometimes the only mother with children in the park, in the summer holidays! I'm literally thinking, where are all the kids?!

Op can I ask why it is you don't have friends with children ? Could it be something to try and change ?

My friends are old school friends who either haven’t had children or were teenager mothers so now have children who are 15/16. I’m not the type that would approach someone so haven’t made any friends at the school and wouldn’t know how to go about changing that.

What I found helped a lot is a timetable, as others have said.
I made it quite structured for the days we were at home and the kids respond quite well to daily timetable.
So we’d have a day that often went like this -
Get up, brush teeth, get changed, make bed
Breakfast
Play in the garden or out to the park or a walk with a picnic ie sandwich, fruit and water
Back home to do some drawing, crafts or workbooks
Tidy up and everyone does one chore
Dinner
Film on Netflix. Each child chooses in turn and everyone watches. Confirm the order of choosing and choice beforehand.
Bath, books and bed.

There are some excellent simple craft ideas on the internet and we did lots of toilet roll crafts, painting a big picture together on a roll of paper, some ‘nature’ pics ie collecting leaves and twigs and stuff.

I get you. Ibl sort of have mixed feelings about it. I'm a teacher so lucky in that no worries for most of the holidays about childcare. But, yes, I don't find it easy. I enjoy some days and others less so. I make a list on in house and outside free activities and we cycle through those. I like museums (usually free), day pass on the buses - on/off - different parks etc, frequent picnics, cheap cinema, treasure hunt type walks, nature hunts, cheap train tickets.....it does get waring though for six weeks especially if not everyone wants to do the same (and I've only go two!) So I do feel for you.

*it gets wearing I mean