Help settle a restaurant debate.

[IcedTeaForMe]

I wasn't one of the people in this scenario but I was having this discussion with a friend who was.

There are five people out to dinner and they're splitting the billl. One person(my Friend) Karen has a gift card for the restaurant given to her by her employer. The gift card more than covers her share so she generously says that the rest of the gift card can be used to deduct from the bill for the other diners meaning that they'd pay around ten pounds less than they would have without Karen's gift card. One diner objects and says that the remaining bill should be split between all five(including Karen) and not the remaining four because she hasn't actually contributed any money to the bill, only a gift card that she didn't pay for.

It seems pretty clear cut to me who was in the wrong, but I'm curious to know what MN thinks?

What if I'd bought myself a gift card because I knew we'd be going to the restaurant and wanted to set the money aside? Would that then be ok? (All right no one would ever actually do that, but you know, for the sake of argument.)

I actually did this once, because a local restaurant had a great deal where if you spent £30 on a gift card they upped the value to £50.

I hope it’s a cycling club ... let the air oot o’ the buggers tyres.

I think Karen's been very generous and all this business about being socially unacceptable is crap!

What if my DH said 'here love, have this meal on me' and passed me a wadge of notes before I went out. That's his money, not mine so is it socially unacceptable because someone else has paid rather than me, directly? Of course it's not. Money is money.

I'd have said, OK let's all have separate bills and I'll pay mine...with my gift card.

I was going to ask what he'd say if she'd bought the gift card I've done this a few times. Sometimes to put money aside for something and sometimes when someone gives me cash but insists I buy myself something with it (usually my birthday money goes on my kids) so I get a voucher for somewhere I like that I can use when I see something I want.
How does he know others weren't funded through birthday money etc.

If Karen had paid her share of the bill by credit card, would the complainer have expected her to pay towards his meal? The gift card is only a token, the actual card has no monetary value but is used instead of cash, just like a bank card. Karen could have just paid for her own meal & kept the remaining credit to use another time but was generous enough to share the credit round the group.

Karen paying using a gift card is the same as her contributing that amount in cash. Letting the rest of the group use the remaining money was very generous of her.

Whoever objected was a total idiot.

Ian is a twat. Karen is in the right, and is generous.

I though the same as PP- that perhaps some of the posters thinking Karen has committed a faux pas are thinking about money off vouchers rather than a gift card?

If I had a free Prosecco/10% off voucher or similar, I would share it equally with the group as a whole, and suspect many would do the same. A gift card is different. As has been pointed out, it’s just an alternative means of payment. I wouldn’t expect a friend to share that equally with the rest of the group. What Karen did was generous.

Some people can't bear it if the bill isn't always just split evenly.

I would have let cf pay his share then split the card between the remainers.

I think it's socially unacceptable to just cover your own bill with the gift card in this situation

Why?
Her share ( plus some!( is being paid. She us not making anyone out of pocket, in fact she us being rather generous. I don't get the problem of why it is not acceptable.

Some people can't bear it if the bill isn't always just split evenly.

Tough luck☺ the bill's never split equally when I'm in a group because I don't drink and I refuse to contribute towards other people's alcoholic drinks ☺

I would have either took the card back and paid my own share in cash and saved the card for another time, or used the card to pay for my own share and the remainder would pay for a portion of the people who weren't complaining about it, and left the last person to pay their own full share, then never went out with him again for a meal.

By his logic; if Karen's husband had given her the money for the meal as a birthday treat, or it was her Christmas present money from her parents, or a small lottery win, would she be expected to use that to pay her share, then a equal share of the remainder? Fucking loony.

I'm so glad I don't put up with the bullshit of splitting bills when I'm eating out, I'll order what I want, and not expect people to subsidise my choices, and in return I'm not subsidising other people's choices.

Hmm difficult one, I have to agree with some of the others, that I would be unnerved if someone used a voucher to cover their share whilst everyone has paid, but in this case everyone benefited from the voucher albeit to a lesser degree, and if Karen also covered the tip, then she has probably found herself in a worse scenario then if she had just paid cash like everyone else.

I think it's socially unacceptable to just cover your own bill with the gift card in this situation

Please come back and explain to us why?

Technically Karen is correct. However, personally I would have put the card in and split the remaining bill across everyone, or saved the gift card for a time when there were less diners and it would cover the whole bill in full.

Ian is certainly a CF for objecting though. Really not OK to make a fuss when he was being given £10 off his bill.

A bigger CF I have come across though is someone who printed a 25% off mains voucher, dined as part of a group of 4, and then expected not to pay as his meal was less than the total reduction (across all 4 meals) - so he paid nothing and everyone else paid full price, despite the fact that deal was 25% off each meal.

I hate Ian. It was her money. Her cash and I would have said he can pay for everything he ate and allowed the others to benefit more. What a CF.

The bloke is an absolute twat. She wants to wait until they all go out again, (if she can endure it), then at the end whip out her cash, then say "oh no, sorry, this cash was a gift, I am not allowed to spend gifts on the meal, what a shame I don't have anything else on me"......

She covered her share, nobody had to pay any more, in fact they paid less. But he is not happy because she physically didn't hand over cold hard cash like they did. What a knob.

to be clear, I'm fine with what Karen did

I just think other people think it's socially unacceptable.

I have no idea why they think that. But I've enough experience of group meals to avoid them in future and to think there's bound to be a type of person who thinks Karen should use her gift card to reduce everyone's bill.

I'm one of these people who would prefer everyone pays for their own stuff. I don't count this kind of thing with my sister and best friend, but with people who aren't close, I do mind. I also hardly drink so if bills are split evenly every time, I lose out.

I really don't understand why paying for your own is seen as a bad thing. My late father dropped out of a retired professional group because he didn't drink much either and he was subbing the drinkers every month at their dinner.

I hope other people in the group stood up for Karen and set CF Ian straight.

There's no technically correct about it, Karen was paying for her meal in real cash, albeit via a gift card. It's completely different to paying for something with a printed coupon. Think of it like the difference between being perfectly acceptable to give someone an amazon voucher for their birthday but not a coupon for the same value cut out from a magazine.

Ian is a cheeky twat. Karen was being generous. I wouldn't go out for a meal with him again

@billben Tough luck☺ the bill's never split equally when I'm in a group because I don't drink and I refuse to contribute towards other people's alcoholic drinks ☺

Do be careful with this approach. Out for dinner last night with DH. He was driving, I had a glass of wine - his coke was £4 my wine was...£4.25. Non alcoholic drinks are often not any less expensive than alcoholic drinks, particularly beer or wine. Obviously it's different if its a massive boozy affair, with aperitifs, multiple bottles of wine each followed by after dinner liqueurs. But normal meals, where the alcohol drinker has the same number of drinks as the soft drink drinker, there's likely very little difference in the cost of their drinks.

Objector was U.

Yes I was going to ask what the others said Billben.
Reading about Ian makes me cross. I know some Ians...
re ""The polite thing to do would be for Karen to ask for the gift card to be deducted from the total, and then all the diners (including Karen) pay an equal share of what remains." It's rubbish.
Karen pays in her £100 gift card for five meals at say £30 a head total £150 The remaining money is split equally. Karen has paid £40 and everyone else £20... How could that possibly be fair?

It wasn't a voucher, it was a gift card, it wasn't a freebie it was paid for.If Karen's boss had given her £50 in cash in an envelope marked only to be used in Nando's, when she opened the envelope in Nando's would she be expected to put the £50 into the pot and then split the bill between 5. All those who think that Karen should have put her gift into the pot are cheeky fuckers too.