House is like a dump yard!!

[stressheadd]

So name changed for this as feel abit embarrassed about this lol

but I need some motivation as I just don't know where to start from I need some inspiration basically a kick up the arse!!

My house is like a skip yard! Well it's not filthy just very messy! I live in a small 2 bedroom terraced house, and in every single room there is a huge toy box full off toys! I have 4 baskets of clothes that need ironing and putting away, my kitchen units are full my dining table is full off letters as the letter drawer is too full to open, the lounge is full off clutter, letters, clothes that need taking up to iron and put away, toys toys and more toys,

And upstairs oh god where do I begin DSs bedroom full off toys and storage boxes of stuff iv been collecting over the years in sales so basically it's like a little shop up there

My bedroom is full off toys, clothes and storage boxes of baby stuff and my toddlers clothes he's grown out of that i dont want to get rid off, I don't know what toys to give away and what toys to keep,most the toys are like vetch and fisher price iv paid a fortune for and iv tried to put some up for sale on gumtree, but no luck in getting rid off them,

I have a very clingy 13 month old baby who cries every time I put her down, so most my days I'm trying to hold my little girl or play with her and I have a 4 year old Son he plays with his toys and won't put them away he doesn't listen to me when I tell him to clean up but when his dads back from work he's a angel and will listen to his dad ,

I would upload a photo of each room but would die of embarrassment if somebody I know in RL realises it's me and that I live like a pig

DH works 5 days a week and out of town so even though he does 9-5 he sets of at 8 and doesn't get home till 6, so I feel to bad asking him for help although he does the washing and hoovers and helps around when he's home

I don't really have any friends or much family so no support there,

I feel like I'm so busy with the kids that I am always going to be behind on housework

I just want the house to be clutter free and clean! I really need to decorate the lounge but I think what's the point when the whole house is a mess,

It's making me feel so down I don't know where to start from or even how to de clutter and how to keep the house clean,

The inside of all my units and drawers need cleaning too I feel like it would take me a whole year to sort the house out

Any tips would be great

Sorry for the essay xx

You need to be ruthless
I have just had my house decorated.
I gave away loads of clothes, books etc to charity
I felt so much better

Glad you feel better Op.
I agree with not ironing clothes until you need them.
I have three kids and when they were younger I used to spend every Sunday ironing mountains of clothes.
My neighbour at the time told me that she never ironed clothes after washing. She simply folded them neatly and ironed them when they were to be worn

You CAN do this.

Find some pics online of how you want your house to look.

I have to do this, it helps me to focus.

The toys you payed for - they have been played with. The money is spent. You dont buy things to make money.

Give plastic wipeable toys to a childrens hospice or ward.

Give other clothes & toys to a Childrens Hospice Charity shop.

Pass the joy of them onto other little ones.

Op I could have written this thread. My house is awful - not dirty but just full of STUFF. I'm going to aim for 30-60 minutes a day clearing one part and then move on to the next. DS is away a bit this summer so will use child free hours to de-clutter and organise. I am going to be ruthless and throw anything away that i haven't used for over 6 months.
I am getting good at being paperless though - even letters from school and activity clubs get scanned and emailed to myself so i can refer to them when I'm out and about (this is great for camp kitlists in the middle of go outdoors).

I have a fairly large 3-bedroom house and can never invite anyone over as I am so embarrassed by the state of it

Wow see how much progress you have made already! That’s amazing. Keep at it :-)

So far I have been quite productive in the lounge

I totally understand where you're coming from. It can really get on top of you and feel like it's never ending! Honestly, what I would do is talk to DP and just say 'look, I want to focus on the house this week, when you get home from work can you take the lead on childcare so I can get stuff done, and once it's done, it's done'.
Make a list at the start of each day and work through it. Don't make it too long or you'll get stressed at not getting it completed. Do the hardest jobs when you're the most energised and the easiest things when you're tired. Like loads have said, attempt to de-clutter as much as possible. Chuck stuff into the attic if you still need it but not right now. When you're chilling at night and the kids are in bed, fire something good on TV and iron at the same time (it makes it feel less boring, I actually just lower the board and sit down on the sofa!) Or if you can afford it, maybe pay for someone to do the ironing this one time just so you can get it away/on top of it and move onto something else.

Don't be afraid to skip corners. Once you've got control of it, you can go back and do a deeper clean and organise more!

Wrt to the kitchen be brave and ruthless! When we listed our house to sell, we had a massive clear out and I reduced the kitchen to what we needed. So 4 of us, 4 plates, 4 bowls, 8 sets of cutlery, one if each type of pan, 2 oven trays, 1 of each utensil I used. Chucked everything else. Of the bigger counter top stuff we kept the microwave kettle and slow cooker. Got rid of sandwich toaster, fryer etc.

We've since moved somewhere new and haven't added a thing to the kitchen as we just have what we need.

Hire a skip and get rid of 90% of it. You aren't being fair on the DC making them live in a cluttered, dirty home. (( And it will be dirty with all the dust settling )) then just stop buying crap.

I mean this kindly. I was in a very, similar situation as you a few years ago. We had to get rid of load when we had the house rewired and I kept on top of it. I rarely buy 'stuff ' these days. Clothing is kept very pared back and replaced like for like only. It's a revelation.........I still struggle with housework but not having piles of stuff around makes life so much easier.

I always start decluttering in hall. It's the first room visitors see.
I take our old clothes to a cash for clothes place. I usually make enough money for a Chinese takeaway. Our local one also takes books, shoes, makeup, bags and some toys.
Stuff going into the loft has to be used at least once a year to merit a place up there otherwise out it goes.
Paperwork - my only day off is Friday. I open the post as it arrives and either deal with it immediately if urgent or put it to one side to deal with on Friday. I have a set of filing trays "In" , "Out" and "Pending" and put them in the appropriate tray. I always put junk mail in the recycling on the day it arrives.
Never put stuff "down" , always put stuff "away". If "away" is full, then declutter it.

Great start! Have you taken 'before' pictures (not to post on here necessarily, but so you can look back at how far you've come)?

I always take pics

Thank you all for your messages, I love the idea, finding a photo online to save of how I would like my house to be,

I know it's unfair in my DC having to live in a messy house,

the lounge looks a lot bigger and cleaner since iv sorted though the toy, so really please with myself,

But this evening I haven't done anything unfortunately after we had our tea I decided to eat a humbug mint and ended up cracking/breaking my tooth and it really hurts,

I'm also frightened of going to the dentist, not sure if they will remove my tooth or somehow put back together so once iv been dentist to sort this out il be back to decluttering,

Oh and I have just remembered I did take a before photo of my lounge as I sent it do my DM to show her how messy the room was yesterday, and in one day I can see such s big improvement still one or two things that need to go but next to sort out is the kitchen.

Take it step by step, first thing is to ensure you have rubbish sacks, recycling bags and a charity shop donation box. Then choose a room, I suggest you start with the mail - most of it will be junk to into the recycling. With the laundry try to see what you can avoid ironing and put it away, then get your kitchen sorted - if it does not fit in a cupboard then do you need it? Toys I would do last but I'm sure you can donate or perhaps sell some, treat the kids with the proceeds. Is there someone who can help, perhaps take your little one out for an hour? The key is attacking in stages