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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want a 50th Birthday Party?

44 replies

BaconAndAvocado · 07/07/2019 22:04

I've bought the invitations, written a guest list but..........I'm just not feeling it. There would be roughly 80 guests, at our house and it seems too overwhelming and like too much hassle right now.

The party was going to be at the end of August, my actual birthday is mid-August.

I went away for a night with some friends last week, DH is taking me away for a few days and there'll probably be a family dinner out.

I feel like this is enough for me.

I was thinking about it today and when I thought that I didn't have to have a big do at all I felt a real sense of relief.

OP posts:
nitgel · 07/07/2019 22:06

Why do you have to do it ,? It was my 50th last month and I just celebrated with close family was lovely Smile

hazeyjane · 07/07/2019 22:12

Blimey, I had a Domino's pizza, glass of prosecco and watched Glastonbury on the telly with dh and the dds on my 50th last weekend.....feel a bit hard done by now!

dudsville · 07/07/2019 22:14

Yup, just close friends here too. Dfi what you want. If later on you decide you regret you can always have a re-50 do over party!

Whatdoyouknowwhenyouknownowt · 07/07/2019 22:14

My DH didn't book the time off work & was away on his...

RefuseTheLies · 07/07/2019 22:15

I had a big birthday a few days ago. Buggered off to a Scottish island with my Dh and dd. Was lovely!

areyoubeingserviced · 07/07/2019 22:16

If you aren’t feeling it , don’t have a party

WorraLiberty · 07/07/2019 22:17

Huh? Of course YANBU.

I got the family together and went to TGI Fridays.

We had a lovely meal and didn't stop laughing all night.

Original poster
BaconAndAvocado · 07/07/2019 22:24

I knew I could count on you all. That's what I needed to hear.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Anyone need some 50th party invitations?

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 07/07/2019 22:27

Hang on to them and buy yourself a Sharpie for your 60th Grin

ohnoessexgirl · 07/07/2019 22:36

Don't do it if it's not what you want. I didn't have a party for my 50th. I bloody hate parties!

Baconsarnie · 07/07/2019 22:39

If there's one thing I've realised, it's that you should do what you want to do on your birthday, not what you feel you ought to do or what anybody else wants.

FizzyGrape · 07/07/2019 22:56

I didn't have, nor did I want, a 50th birthday party. Went out to a local restaurant with 4 closest friends on the actual day, and a London comedy at the weekend with 2 daughters and my husband. Perfect.

YouTheCat · 07/07/2019 22:56

My 50th is in August too. No way would I go through the stress of a party.

drsausage · 07/07/2019 23:25

DH had a party - it was expensive and stressful. I learnt from his mistake, and have rented a house by a lake and invited just family.

I see I have found my (50 year old) people :-)

WoollyMummoth · 07/07/2019 23:31

Don’t have the party if you don’t want it. I’m 50 next month and it’s going to be a takeaway and Netflix with my dh ds dd. I’ve told them no balloons , I hate the sodding things.

Stripyhoglets · 07/07/2019 23:31

I'm not having a party. Too stressful. Having a weekend away with family.

Pantsomime · 07/07/2019 23:37

Do what you want. That’s the great thing about being 50- resist expectation and pressure. You choose - sounds like few people and a take out may be in order

musicposy · 08/07/2019 00:05

I didn't want one either. I had a party for my 30th, a big party for my 40th, but I just wasn't feeling it for my 50th. A lot of my friends had big parties but I decided that I hadn't got to 50 without being able to resist a bit of societal pressure. I had a meal out with DH and my two DC which was lovely.

Do what you feel, for you. That's one of the things I'm really liking about being 50.

UnderTheTree · 08/07/2019 00:14

Yanbu. My 50th was pretty chill, weekend away with my family and I had a few drinks with close friends of mine.

My DH threw me a biggish party for my 40th (40 guests, hired out a room etc). I mean I had a good time, bit of a laugh but it was stressful, expensive. Once was enough.

Adult DD's are talking about having a big party for my DH 60th...

SrSteveOskowski · 08/07/2019 00:15

I'm 40 this year. DH and I are going away for a few days.
I have warned him that under no circumstances is he to throw a surprise party. He knows I mean it too!

Herocomplex · 08/07/2019 00:16

August is really tricky anyway as loads of people are away. Enjoy whatever you decide to do!

DramaAlpaca · 08/07/2019 00:22

I can't even remember what I did for mine a few years back, so it must have been very low key. I do remember warning everyone that if they threw a surprise party I'd run away - they got the message Grin

Just do what makes you happy, it's your birthday after all.

TwoPupsandaHamster · 08/07/2019 00:51

My 50th birthday came and went, just like any other. I wouldn't have wanteď a big celebration tbh. It's just another birthday
I'm positive nobody else would have been in the least bit interested. Why would they??

MadisonAvenue · 08/07/2019 01:04

I'm 50 (Shock) later this month and I wouldn't want a party. My husband's started to ask what I want to do on the day as it's a Saturday but in all honesty I don't want any fuss, I just want to treat it as any other day.
I'm struggling with the thought of turning 50.

LAS504 · 08/07/2019 01:10

By all means, do what YOU want to do! That said, do make sure you mark the day/hour/moment in a way that is meaningful to you.

Happy Birthday.

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