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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to go to Australia for the weekend?!

920 replies

HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:16

My best friend (male if relevant) is getting married in the autumn. I'm in the UK (where we both grew up) he now lives in Australia.

I desperately want to go to the wedding.

It will cost £1000 for the flight plus accomodation etc over there which is in no way small money.

I have 4DC so would be asking my parents (very hands on babysitters, have had them for me and DH to go on holiday etc) to have the DC (all under 10) while DH is at work.

I would leave on a thursday AM flight and get back tuesday pm. SO literally fly in for the wedding, the day after and then back home.

Am I being totally crazy to consider this?! (Haven't actually asked DH yet!!)

OP posts:
Frankiestein402 · 07/07/2019 09:33

I did this for an urgent meeting - couldn't hang around as had holiday flights booked from UK to US, had previously worked in Singapore and Sydney so was aware of how flights played out.

I wouldn't try to adjust to timezone - depending on wedding timing, treat it as a very early rise or very late night :)

On the plus side it won't be ridiculously hot in oz - if this was in January then no way.

Main issue for this likely to be when meals are served on plane/whether & how long you are off plane when it refuels.

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 09:34

frances DH is a cricketer - maybe i will bargain that if he wants to do the same for a cricket final somewhere i will support it!!

OP posts:
Tumbleweed101 · 07/07/2019 09:35

Talk to your parents and dh, they may be willing to help longer when they know what you’d like to do.

And it would be a ‘no’ from me for just a weekend. Knowing how exhausted a 12hr flight made me and doing double that and then another back pretty much straight away would be a killer.

I’d want to explore as well so would be gutted not to be able to see a little once I got there.

Seeleyboo · 07/07/2019 09:35

I did this to Korea. 3 hours to airport and a 15 hour flight. 2 hour bus journey to literally escort my friend to her village safely as her husband had died and she wasn't in Korea when she was told. I spent then night in a random strangers house and got the bus back to the airport and flew back home. I must say I was shattered but the flight is long enough for a good sleep. Earplugs and eye shades are a must and take a blanket too.

Nononononono33 · 07/07/2019 09:36

If it’s comfortable financially and child care wise (and it sounds like it’s ok for you) I think I would do this.

bingbongnoise · 07/07/2019 09:36

@HufflepuffHarpy

LOL there is no way you can go to Australia 'for the weekend!'. I have been to OZ (and NZ) and it took me 3 days JUST to recover from the jet lag. They are half a day ahead in time. Also know people who have been 3 or 4 times, and they all struggle for a few days too. Never known anyone go for less than 3 weeks.

Do you know how long the journey actually is? Confused Are you confusing it with Austria? Wink It takes so long to get there that you have to stop overnight halfway, and stay in another country (on the way!)

People saying 'yeah go for i!' have obviously never been to Australia (or NZ) before.

So YABU obvs.

mustdrivesoon · 07/07/2019 09:37

I would worry about dvt spending that much time in the air over such a short period.

sashh · 07/07/2019 09:37

I've done UK to Pz and back a couple of times, I get over the jet lag going in about 1 day. I would build in time in case your flight is delayed but go do it.

I did get told off by immigration the last time because, "two weeks isn't enough" so for a weekend, well good luck and have fun.

myself2020 · 07/07/2019 09:37

i’ve done 2 days austria/new zealand/japan etc for business several times. not fun, but doable

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 09:38

bing i have been to NZ (twice actually) so i do know how long the flight is. you do not need to stay overnight on the way?! stopover is 5/6 hours in singapore.

OP posts:
RhodaDendron · 07/07/2019 09:38

DH did this recently for a sport event. All well until his flight was delayed 24 hours on the way back... he said he’d do it again though!
I once did the trip for a week for a family thing. Had one of the best weeks of my life... fell asleep at my desk on return and did go through some of the worst jetlag I’ve ever known. Compromises I guess!?

mumwon · 07/07/2019 09:39

I would arrange the travel so you arrive in their evening so you have a nights sleep - you will have a change over midway (dependent upon airline) & waiting time in that airport - you will also have to deal with the collecting of luggage at your Australian airport. How far from the airport will you be staying? will you be collected? Don't forget you will have to factor in the time difference ( they are 9 hours ahead at the moment which increases later in the year) of your arrival & leaving & also if there are any delays at any stage. If you can sleep on the first stage & get window seat so you don't have people climbing over you (you need to be selfish here!) but the amount of sleep you get is dependent on who you sit near! Even so it will take you a couple of days to feel human & you may feel dizzy for a couple of days - from my experience - I reckon you need to be there bit longer!

Slicedpineapple · 07/07/2019 09:40

The flight will be almost as long than your time in Australia and the jet lag is an absolute killer. Took me days to get over and trying to stay awake through it made me sick.

Cannyhandleit · 07/07/2019 09:40

@bingbongnoise you definetly do not need an over night stop over

Latenightthinking22 · 07/07/2019 09:40

I live in Australia, so have done the travel a few times. I travel well. The long journey doesn't bother me. So if I was in your shoes , I would go for it!

I was concerned that you might have wanted to return to work the day after you get back. In which case I would have suggested no.. but you are a SAHP , so even though you'll probably be knackered with the kids when you get back, I think you would be okay Smile you could even ask your mom if she wouldn't mind helping out the day after you get back, with the intention that you would do the lions share that day, unless you are feeling too tired.

Best of luck, I say go for it!!! Smile

Bobbybobbins · 07/07/2019 09:41

I flew to Greece for a very good friend's wedding - basically 1 day travelling to get there, day of the wedding, left at 8 am next morning to start journey home with a hangover Grin
I don't regret it as it was an absolute blast and I don't regret spending the money but if I was doing it again I'd really try to have an extra day there.
We have 2 DC with learning difficulties so my DH was frazzled when I got back. I was frazzled from tiredness so it took a week at least to get over it!

GrassIsntGreener · 07/07/2019 09:42

I knew I'd seen a post like this before.

OP this may help? It's someone who had a similar problem back in Feb this year.

Weekend in Australia www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/3467469-weekend-in-australia

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 09:43

i'll have a read grass thanks!

OP posts:
MummyDummyNow · 07/07/2019 09:43

Do it OP! As someone else said, ignore the people who are acting like you're going to the moon! It'll be great fun. I know a couple of people who went to Oz for a weekend (to watch rugby) and they were fine!

Go and have fun OP, you only live once.

rookiemere · 07/07/2019 09:44

OP if you can get away with a shorter stopover then try to do that. I had literally half an hour in Doha as my inbound flight was delayed,and it really helped not getting comfortable or having loads of time to kill.

supercatlady · 07/07/2019 09:45

I travel to Brisbane every 2-3 years. I'd really advise trying to go for a week if you can. Perhaps the week before and fly back after. The day after the flight is a write off due to jetlag. I went for a week for my brothers wedding - arrived Thurs for a Sat wedding even then I couldn't stay up past 9pm on the day.
Good luck!

Atthebottomofthegarden · 07/07/2019 09:45

As long as your parents and DH don’t mind, and you can afford it, GO!

BarbedBloom · 07/07/2019 09:45

I wouldn't and I say that as someone who had to miss one of my best friends weddings. It is too much money and a lot to ask of your parents. It already sounds like they do a lot anyway.

The environmental impact would be a factor for me too and having to take a chunk out of savings and take a year to pay it back. You have said you can't afford paid childcare so this is clearly a big chunk of money for you. If anything happened over that year you could wipe out your buffer completely. Sorry, but I do think it is a bit selfish given the impact on everyone around you.

Someone could video it and send to you

Slicedpineapple · 07/07/2019 09:46

Bobby a flight to Greece and a flight to Australia are very different things
The flight is like 22 hours (was in my case) + stop over + airport time + travel to the airport

I love my bestie but I would not do this, also because I couldn't justify the money.

Atthebottomofthegarden · 07/07/2019 09:48

I have never particularly had jet lag either direction when I’ve travelled to Oz/NZ. Just make sure you get an aisle seat and take ear plugs and an eye mask. Then you’ll grab enough winks to see you through...

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