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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to go to Australia for the weekend?!

920 replies

HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:16

My best friend (male if relevant) is getting married in the autumn. I'm in the UK (where we both grew up) he now lives in Australia.

I desperately want to go to the wedding.

It will cost £1000 for the flight plus accomodation etc over there which is in no way small money.

I have 4DC so would be asking my parents (very hands on babysitters, have had them for me and DH to go on holiday etc) to have the DC (all under 10) while DH is at work.

I would leave on a thursday AM flight and get back tuesday pm. SO literally fly in for the wedding, the day after and then back home.

Am I being totally crazy to consider this?! (Haven't actually asked DH yet!!)

OP posts:
SushiForAmateurs · 09/07/2019 15:41

I'm definitely NOT

I definitely DIDN'T

OK. Wink

We're all posting on the same thread, and can see what's been said.

Catwaving · 09/07/2019 15:44

and another! I have no need to apologise to the OP about being wrong, she wasn't invited. She gave us the full run-down....

Three perfect straw men thrown at me in a row, thank you Sushi!

Now let's get back to the real issue which is trivial air travel....requiring about 165,000 trees to work for a full year to neutralise (the full, return flight that is before you chuck another straw man at me)...during a time of climate breakdown

dragonfruitshoot · 09/07/2019 15:45

I really really wish I could bury my head in the sand and forget about. I'm terrified for DD's future. I very much feel in the minority in my peer group though, in general it doesn't seem as high on their list of worries. But then maybe, like me, they're not talking about it too much as it can cause bad feeling (like here!)

Catwaving · 09/07/2019 15:45

...and another constructed while I was responding

You are the master

SushiForAmateurs · 09/07/2019 15:46

The OP was invited. It was assumed she wouldn't come because of the distance and cost, and her friend didn't want to put pressure on her.

It seems to me that you don't understand how these things work.

Catwaving · 09/07/2019 15:47

Let's see what else I didn't say, think or do that you're going to accuse me of....

Catwaving · 09/07/2019 15:47

To get yourself off the real issues

MarshaBradyo · 09/07/2019 15:48

Sushi
and anyone else who’s said yay, do you think we’re experiencing a climate emergency?

SushiForAmateurs · 09/07/2019 15:51

Yes, I do, but just like you - and every single other person on this thread - I don't always prioritise the climate over literally everything else, every single time.

I do my best. But I do go on long haul flights. Because of our family situation, I'm afraid that won't be changing.

I try to do my bit in other ways.

Like everyone else on this thread, nobody is perfect.

MarshaBradyo · 09/07/2019 15:53

No I agree, perfect is probably off grid.

But I am surprised that this thread wasn’t more aligned with the environmental concerns that are top of news. I did say, hoped, that another thread would have a different tone

MsTSwift · 09/07/2019 15:55

It’s a mind blowing time to live in at the moment though. Scientists explain the issues which to me as a non scientist sound fucking terrifying and are actually happening now yet the majority of the population and politicians just stick their fingers in their ears and carry on business as usual leaving the minority baffled - have they heard what we heard?! Do we all just ignore it? The only arguments from the ignoring group seem really weak and largely consist of “other people are worse” “I really like holidays” “you don’t live in a hedge yourself you hypocrite” none of which fill me with confidence that they know what they’re doing

MarshaBradyo · 09/07/2019 15:57

And top of list for consideration (as in it at least makes the cons list) I would hope is flying across world for a quick jolly or a meeting. Another day and a different response, hopefully.

SushiForAmateurs · 09/07/2019 15:59

But I am surprised that this thread wasn’t more aligned with the environmental concerns

I'm not surprised, because real life simply doesn't work that way.

Is this the most optimal decision the OP could be making when it comes to the environment? No.

Because none of us live our lives that way, and sometimes frivolous decisions based on old friendship, and a great memory take precedence, as unworthy and ethically wrong as that may be.

boosterrooster · 09/07/2019 16:00

Love it! Go for it! You could probably get away with just bringing hand luggage, won't have to worry about luggage possibly getting lost.
Plan your sleep so as you adjust a bit on route...try get into Oz time zone if possible

waterlego · 09/07/2019 16:00

I couldn’t do it but I really hate flying and would want to be there for at least 3 weeks to justify the horror of the journey. If you’re not a bad flyer and you really want to go, YABU.

waterlego · 09/07/2019 16:00

I meant YANBU!

Ilovesnowsnowsnow · 09/07/2019 16:01

It’s doable definitely a friend of mine did it last year for a 21st. I would do it. Good luck xx

MarshaBradyo · 09/07/2019 16:03

The op might but to say ‘god at least the carbon footprint brigade haven’t turned up’ baffles me. Almost in a stupidity of humanity way, how are people still so happy to ignore what’s going on

It seems people think it’s not relevant. Not happening. Anyway hopefully we’re not done for yet.

SushiForAmateurs · 09/07/2019 16:10

It seems people think it’s not relevant

I'm sure that's the case for some, well, it is the case for many.

For others, it is relevant, but not always the overriding priority. Realistically, you're probably never going to convince people to always prioritise the environment, every single time.

You have to admit that you, yourself, won't prioritise the environment every single time (as much as the hypocrisy argument is roundly dismissed!). It's not possible, and it seems as if the OP is being singled out to behave in a way that others won't or - more realistically - can't (always).

dragonfruitshoot · 09/07/2019 16:20

You definitely won't convince people to always prioritise the environment every single time, I completely agree, although we should all try and make big changes. Which is why we need governments to do so much more than they are doing to address this. Make it a priority. It's time to panic.

MarshaBradyo · 09/07/2019 16:22

And businesses at least let them feel the heat - which you wouldn’t from this (one off I know)

Snoopertrooper · 09/07/2019 16:31

Absolutely crazy. The journey is the most tiring thing I have ever done. I was wrecked when I got home and I went for 6 weeks

Tavannach · 09/07/2019 16:54

@IfOnlyOurEyesSawSouls

Indeed, ongoing education being the main source I believe.

MsTSwift · 09/07/2019 17:15

Maybe the yolo brigade are right and we are just boring old killjoys. Let’s hope so hey!

MsTSwift · 09/07/2019 17:18

Anyway fuck it it’s not actually us that will suffer anyway is it it’s just our kids....oh wait