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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder how you could go on a cruise months after killing your 6 year old Great Grandson?

97 replies

TooOldForAllThatShit · 06/07/2019 12:14

Very upsetting article warning.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7218223/Stanley-Metcalfs-parents-relive-told-sons-twin-sister-died.html

On his Facebook there are pictures of him on a cruise holiday months later after he lied about what happened. I find it hard to fathom how any family members are on his side.

The shooting was a totally preventable accident but what he did afterwards was totally despicable IMO.

OP posts:
RottnestFerry · 06/07/2019 18:05

I really hope, like the parents of little Andrew Morton in Scotland, Stanleys parents see licensing laws for air rifles being introduced in England.

Licensing laws for air rifles already exist in England. The man should have had one, he chose not to apply for one because he didn't think it would be granted. If he can be believed, that is.

Ohnotanothernamechange · 06/07/2019 18:07

Just found his FB. Nasty cunt all round by the looks of things. Lots of quite overtly racist stuff.

flamingjune123 · 06/07/2019 18:12

If the same scenario had happened and the perpetrator was 30 I think most of us would realise he is a psychopath.
For some odd reason his age seems to have clouded things
Psychopaths don't change with age

Handsoffmysweets · 06/07/2019 18:22

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Weightissues · 06/07/2019 18:29

He murdered him. I’m surprised he wasn’t charged with that tbh
If you point and fire a gun at a child it’s murder that’s not an accident
3 years is nothing really.

Like others have said I do hope prison provides the punishment he deserves

bellabasset · 06/07/2019 18:29

Heartbreaking for his parents and sister, what on earth made this man keep a modified gun loaded as due to an accident he'd lost the dexterity in his right hand enabling him to operate the safety catch.

The article says he should have had a licence but due to his lack of dexterity didn't apply for one. How can you not feel responsible?

Disfordarkchocolate · 06/07/2019 18:34

I agree it should have been murder, perhaps they didn't think they could prove intent? I hope he has a dreadful time in prison and doesn't end up surrounded by equally horrible people who give him status for what he did.

RottnestFerry · 06/07/2019 19:15

Does anybody really think he intended to kill his great grandson? That would be the only circumstance that would make a murder charge appropriate.

Butchyrestingface · 06/07/2019 19:56

Does anybody really think he intended to kill his great grandson? That would be the only circumstance that would make a murder charge appropriate.

Not so. I’m in Scotland where people have been convicted of murder when it was accepted there was absolutely no intent to kill anyone. Notably this case:

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/4134694.stm

The two cases are dissimilar in all other respects though and I agree that it was not murder in this case. He should have got longer though.

Graphista · 06/07/2019 20:18

"You never point a weapon at anything you aren't intending to shoot." Exactly! Even if you think it's unloaded. I've grown up with people who use guns in their professions or hobbies and that's basic first rule you learn!

He's an arrogant cunt who only cares about himself.

Shockingly low sentence too particularly given the major lack of remorse which even the police involved in the case felt strongly enough about to comment on. This is rare.

Personally I think all gun users should be licensed and regularly assessed on their ability, health and safety that may affect their responsible use of guns. I'd include licensing for crossbows and similar too (there's been several incidents with children involving these lately too)

"Did the 'perpetrator' lie about what happened?" Read the article linked and others on the case. He played "deny deny deny" throughout, to the point of messing with the police investigation.

His only concern throughout has been in trying to avoid blame or legal justice.

"Horrible people don't suddenly turn into innocent paragons of virtue and love on their 65th birthday. They're just older horrible people." Exactly! I worked in elderly care for several years, the reasons some of them weren't being cared for by family was frankly because they were nasty, abusive people some of whom had been, and continued to be violent and aggressive. Age doesn't make someone innocent!

Firstworddinosaur · 06/07/2019 20:33

But if he didn't intend to kill him he must have intended to seriously hurt him. Why else would you pull the trigger of a rifle whilst pointing it at a child??? 3 years for taking that poor boy's life. I don't understand.

MrsMiggins37 · 06/07/2019 20:35

INot so. I’m in Scotland where people have been convicted of murder when it was accepted there was absolutely no intent to kill anyone*

Mens rea for murder in scotland is wicked recklessness, not “intent”. Pointing a firearm at someone would I reckon satisfy that definition here. Not sure what the mens rea is in england though.

Racheyg · 06/07/2019 20:43

I can't believe he got such a short sentence. If my father or father in law hurt or killed dcs' I don't think they could ever live with themselves.

I'm appalled the he didn't apologise and his family have stood by him

GabsAlot · 06/07/2019 20:44

As he lied i thought he shold have got longer

LauderSyme · 06/07/2019 21:07

Why are so many people trying to justify his behaviour with ‘he couldn’t deal with it’

My intention was not to justify his behaviour but maybe to try and explain it. Psychologists do say that sometimes criminals are incapable of taking responsibility for their crimes because to do so is too threatening and overwhelming to their sense of who they are. I have been astonished at hearing people who have committed the most terrible acts say "I am not a bad person". Obviously, this inability to get beyond one's own ego does not speak well of one's character.

In this case it does seem more likely that the great grandfather is a vile, heartless, controlling piece of shit, as articulated so eloquently here. Maybe my point is more relevant to the family members supporting him - or maybe they are just as selfish and nasty as he is.

thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter · 06/07/2019 21:15

Awful arrogant prick of a man, hope he kicks the bucket in prison. The flying monkeys that stood by him are total shits as well.

RottnestFerry · 07/07/2019 08:16

Not so. I’m in Scotland where people have been convicted of murder when it was accepted there was absolutely no intent to kill anyone. Notably this case

Errr... this crime was committed in England.

BlackCatSleeping · 07/07/2019 08:22

I think the manslaughter charges came later. There was quite a long investigation where they went from thinking it was an accident to realizing it was something more sinister.

Butchyrestingface · 07/07/2019 09:44

Errr... this crime was committed in England

Yes, I know. Hence why I said that the cases were dissimilar.

SerendipityJane · 07/07/2019 09:51

Psychologists do say that sometimes criminals are incapable of taking responsibility for their crimes because to do so is too threatening and overwhelming to their sense of who they are.

Hmm at the risk of sounding overly cynical, there's little incentives in psychologists admitting that some people are simply cunts whose behaviour is no more complex or in need of explanation than they are cunts and do cunty things.

AbbyHammond · 07/07/2019 09:52

Just incredible arrogance. I'm betting he wasn't a sweet old man and this came out of the blue.

NotNowNinja · 07/07/2019 09:58

The parents didn’t know the rifles had been illegally adapted or that the grandad would so careless, reckless and mind boggling stupid.
I have so much sympathy for Stanley’s parents and his twin absolutely heartbreaking.
I have zero sympathy for stanley’s Killer and the disgusting family that have rallied around him instead of supporting Stanley’s parents. I can’t believe anyone could support someone so callous as the killer- posting merry Xmas msg on fb whilst on a jolly the day after what would have been Stanley’s birthday-beyond disgraceful.

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