To want to move this far from DHs kids

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So we are looking to buy our first house as currently renting.

The area we live in at the moment is very expensive, especially for a first time buyer.

There is another area which is nice and much more reasonable in cost. It is 25 minutes away in the car.

Here we would likely get a 2 bedroom small house with no garden for the same price as a large house and nice garden in the other area.

The drive from here to there is over nice country roads so not much chance to get stuck in lots of traffic etc ...

DH is reluctant to look as we currently live 5 minutes from his ex.

The kids are with us 50:50 a week. AIBU to suggest that we would all be better off for the extra 20 minute drive to pick them up? To me that really isn't a huge deal, it isn't hours. They would have a garden to play in and a room of their own etc...

subjected to 50/50

He'd get slated if he had them less than their mum and he gets slated for wanting them the same amount of time anyway...

These are all good points to consider and I am perfectly willing to, I just want H to afford the same courtesy of looking at all the options together as well.

We have a child under 1.

Is 20 mins ideally speaking or 20 mins allowing for traffic?

My parents lived “20 minutes away” from each other when they separated. The reality was 45 minutes to an hour daily in the car and when I was older, 2 buses to get to my friends who lived near my school when I was with the parent to lived further away from school.

So, a massive pain in the arse.

It’s for that reason I won’t beyond a fairly narrow area in the city I live in. I want my daughter to not have to do any of that when she’s older. So I’ll always live “near” my ex, but it’s for my child.

We like in one of the national parks so traffic is not a problem, I've never witnessed traffic over this road before in all my time here. It really is 20 mins.

Live*

How old are the children OP?

I was wondering if your husbands ex has had any views on all this,, as in saying she doesn't like the idea of you moving, just a thought !

If traffic isn’t going to be a factor, I think your husband should at least consider it.

OP How many DC are there? With 2 bedrooms does this mean that all the DC will have to share 1 bedroom (which might be a problem when they are older) but with the new home, they might have their own bedrooms/space when they come to stay?

20 minutes is nothing. It will improve your quality and kids quality of life too. Having enough space for your whole family is more important than an extra 15 min drive.