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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want to give her the ticket

76 replies

Snidpan · 04/07/2019 08:42

This year I've taken OH to New York (first class seats), and paid £6k to have her rotten teeth sorted out privately. We always dined out at least 3 times a week, and I thought she was enjoying our life together. She dumped me two weeks ago, and with Pride approaching, AIBU to not want to hand over the ticket I had bought with her in mind.

OP posts:
kateandme · 04/07/2019 11:16

does she think youve bought her a ticket.does she even know?im confused

HappyLoneParentDay · 04/07/2019 11:28

Wait, they charge you to attend a parade about celebrating diversity? Wth?!

Bluthbanana · 04/07/2019 11:44

Of course you don't give her the ticket, it's yours and you might want to take a friend.

But she doesn't owe you a relationship just because you were happy to fling cash around. You've been dumped, it sucks, but that mindset won't help you.

LadyRannaldini · 04/07/2019 11:45

she's moving out in 3 days

If she dumped you two weeks ago, why is she still there at all, show her the door! Get a hard copy of the ticket and burn it in front of her.

HouseworkAvoider10 · 04/07/2019 11:47

No way.
No ticket for her.
Tell her to jog on.

Teddybear45 · 04/07/2019 11:47

Don’t give her the ticket. You are under no moral obligation.

sneakypinky · 04/07/2019 11:48

Is she under the impression that you are going to give it to her? If so it would be a good idea for you to put her straight.

stanski · 04/07/2019 11:53

Hell NO. Change name on ticket and go with someone else. She can get her own if she really wants to go.

trackingmedown · 04/07/2019 12:08

sneakypinky. I think I saw what you did there.

Lweji · 04/07/2019 12:18

How do you know she is planning on using the ticket you bought? Is it sold out or something?

And what ticket? Pride where?
I got curious and in London it seems to be free. Is it a side thing?

Whatever you spent on her it should be a gift. If you were not prepared to give it regardless of her staying or not, then you shouldn't have paid for any of it.

Original poster
Snidpan · 04/07/2019 12:21

@tomatostottie
Think you are bit mean to write "get her rotten teeth" sorted out - could you not have thought of a nicer way of phrasing that."

When one of the teeth came out, it was followed by half a teaspoon of pus!

OP posts:
Pinkmalinky · 04/07/2019 12:24

You know YANBU at all.

tomatostottie · 04/07/2019 12:34

When one of the teeth came out, it was followed by half a teaspoon of pus!

Ah ok - so an accurate description.. rather than a little bit mean.
Yeah I think she's taken advantage of you and should be offering to pay back some or all of the dentist's charges. Could she have afforded this treatment if it hadn't been for you?

BarrenFieldofFucks · 04/07/2019 12:35

How do we know she has been taking advantage? The relationship has ended, it happens.

NoSquirrels · 04/07/2019 12:41

Ask someone else now, and let her know who you’re taking. Don’t leave it hanging!

browzingss · 04/07/2019 12:55

When one of the teeth came out, it was followed by half a teaspoon of pus!

I know I’m bypassing the point, but how could you date someone with poor dental care/hygiene to that extent? Makes me want to gag

bingbongnoise · 04/07/2019 13:00

@Snidpan

Really????? Hmm

sadkoala · 04/07/2019 13:05

Confused here, did you buy the tickets or did she buy her own?

Has she asked for it?

Why did you date someone with rotten teeth?

Original poster
Snidpan · 04/07/2019 13:15

I've bought 2 tickets online, sat in my inbox.

Dated someone with rotten teeth because she was (for 2 years, anyway) a lovely person. The teeth looked ok, but it affected her breath a bit... She had a massive fear of dentists. It was my pleasure to pay, although initially, I'd guessed it was going to be nearer 2 grand

OP posts:
StillCoughingandLaughing · 04/07/2019 13:25

And what ticket? Pride where?
I got curious and in London it seems to be free. Is it a side thing?

Im guessing Brighton?

Original poster
Snidpan · 04/07/2019 14:18

I'm sure Kylie is charging, so her wage has to come from somewhere

OP posts:
Lweji · 04/07/2019 14:30

Ok, if Brighton, then tickets are still available, although, presumably at a higher cost than the ones you bought.

Either keep it, in case you want to take someone (date or not), or charge her for it, if you want your money back.

If you want to keep it, you don't have to say a word about her expectations. Let her go to you if she expects it.

Lweji · 04/07/2019 14:32

But...
"All etickets will have the lead bookers name printed on them and the card holder must be present with id when exchanging for wristbands at the gate."

Would you want to have her around to enter the festival? I wouldn't. So, I'd just keep it and invite someone else.

Redred2429 · 04/07/2019 14:34

Don't give her the ticket take someone else who appreciates you

SavingSpaces2019 · 04/07/2019 15:11

Sounds like you were her meal ticket when she was with you.
Why do you feel like you owe her anything after she dumped you?

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