Would you rather?

[VivienneHolt]

Sweat garlic mayonnaise

Or

Be unable to tell the difference between food and dog poo?

OP I had a glass of wine with lunch today, so this isn't judgement, but how much drink have you actually taken today? Go and have a little nap and come back about 7pm once you're dried out.

Also, sweat garlic mayo every time. Anyone who says different is a psychopath.

Sweat garlic mayo.

Love GM. No brainer.

Is this a new Richard Herring emergency question?

It smacks of sun lotion armpit / ham hand.

I think would rather not be able to tell the difference between food and dog poo, and just be very careful about the provenance of everything I ate.

(No alcohol has been taken, which is a damn shame)

This thread needs a trigger warning.

Sweat garlic mayo Who would want to eat dog shit?? apart from my dog who occasionally eats his own

Sweat garlic mayo, obviously.

See I think if you can’t tell the difference between food and dog shit, then it doesn’t seem like you’re eating dog shit. It’s would be like some ambiguous third thing where it could simultaneously be either. Just like everything on the side of the foot path could be a scone, or dog shit. You just wouldn’t know. You would be haunted by the possibility you had got it wrong.

(Which still has to be better than being sticky with garlic mayo all the time, right?)

If everybody sweated garlic mayo no-one would notice the smell! Like when your partner eats garlic bread or curry and you have something plain to eat you think that their breath stinks the next day - but if you've eaten the same then you don't notice.

What are you going on about?

I hate these questions, they make me get all hot and flustered. The worst one I've been asked is: would you rather have sex with a goat or have everyone in your entire life believe that you have had sex with a goat?
Why do we have to choose, dammit????!

Would you rather watch your parents have sex everyday or join in once and make it stop? Was the worse one I've been asked

I have nothing to add, I just want to read the following comments

Would you rather watch your parents have sex everyday or join in once and make it stop? Was the worse one I've been asked

Genuinely every hole in my body has just spontaneously clenched and sealed itself up at this question! I will never stop thinking about this.

Why have i never had sweet garlic mayo? Sounds amazing

I don’t even understand this.

Ha ha or 'would you rather have sex with your mum and everyone knew or sex with your dad and no one knew...."

And can anyone think of any WYR less preferable than 'or drink dog period blood'...

Sorry, our drunken family parties are horrendous

Garlic mayo smell is better than having dog shit breath for sure!

I was skeptical when I opened this thread but now that others have put questions they've been given, I'm intrigued.

Goat sex. Hmm. Someone would find out because I would never be able to keep the shame inside, I'd have to tell a therapist at least.

My dad and no one knew!?! Wtf, I wouldn't want everyone knowing I'd snagged my mum... Yuck

I'd rather everyone thought I'd shagged a goat that my mum 🐐

How would sex with a goat even work??

I always quite liked "Would you rather go to prison for 10 years for something you did or for 5 years for something you didn't do?" I'm not sure the telling the difference between food and dog poo really makes enough sense for this to be a great would you rather.

10 years for something I did do, 5 years for being innocent would be awful