To want to skip to IVF after 3 months TTC?

[HelloKitty76]

I know 3 months is nothing but I'm 37 and so worried about the bio clock. If we don't conceive soon there may well not be time left for another.

We would fund it ourselves obviously. Yet would a clinic be prepared to treat us after only 3 months trying do you think? Would they think we were being ridiculous?

YABU. Took me eight months to conceive at 37 but I had a lovely straightforward pregnancy and a healthy son. Clinics will tell you anything to get your money.

I don’t know what a “fertility MOT” consists of but presumably you know you are ovulating and no major problems with sperm. Why on earth would you go for IVF now? You have something like an 80% chance of conceiving naturally within a year, 90% within two years versus 46% (if accurate) with IVF. It’s a no brainer for at least the first year of ttc.

Are you using ovulation sticks? Def worth a try and giving it a few more goes. Ivf babies have a higher rates of certain cancers etc so worth trying to conceive naturally first if possible. Good luck xxxxx

Maybe try turkey baster or whatever it is people use?
There are stats that ivf increases birth defects slightly (icsi) maybe asd etc.
I would double check thyroid - tsh is around 1.
Check your cycles are regular and you dont have pcos

@HelloKitty76 I have a 2 year old DS conceived via ICSI. It is not a nice process and we self funded after 2 years of trying naturally. I have had 2 failed rounds trying to get a sibling. I'm 36 and I only got one fertilised embryo this past cycle that didn't survive the thaw.

There is no guarantee with IVF. 3 months is nothing. I understand you're panicking because of your age but I would give it at least 6 months before resorting to IVF. It is not an easy process or a 'quick fix' and I found these last 2 cycles much harder than the successful one I had when I 33.

I hope you conceive naturally. Don't give up hope

@Missmonkeypenny thank you

It took us 6 months at 36. YABU to consider IVF yet. Try for another 6 months. What did your fertility MOTs day? I assume it was all good or you'd have said.

If you want to take it to the next level of trying .. sort of super charge your trying ... these are the things I recommend.

1. Read taking charge of your fertility

1. Take your temperature using a basal body thermometer, every morning at the same time as soon as you wake up (before you move).

1. Use fertility friend paid for edition app. Record your temperature, ovulation sticks and cervical mucus in that. It will tell you if you are ovulating much better than an ovulation stick.

1. Follow SMEP method of when to shag. It makes sure you cover all the best days. Best days are the 2 days before ovulation day.

spermmeetseggplan.com

I actually found the smiley face sticks didn't work for me. I never got a smiley face the month I conceived but I did get a positive on a cheap ovulation stick. I don't know if you know this but the window to detect the ovulation hormone is very small and it often happens in the afternoon not the morning. For me it was around 8pm.

Another vote for the lube that helps sperm mobility. We’d been trying to conceive for months (we are mid 30’s) and fell pregnant almost instantly with this stuff. We bought it from amazon. The best £13 I’ve ever spent!

It took us 18 months at 27, gave birth the month before my 30th birthday.
If you know that there are no obvious issues from your MOT then I think you'd be better waiting a bit longer.
Set yourself a review date, say, in 6 months.

That's what we did, using temperature charts to predict ovulation and ensuring we at least knew if we'd DTD during the requisite days. That way, our hopes were only raised for approximately 2 weeks every cycle. It didn't stop the disappointment but did stop the endless negative tests. I was incredibly irregular and, before charts, was almost certainly doing tests before I'd even ovulated in some cycles. We actually conceived in the last cycle before our review date.

Good Luck.

And is your cycle regular and your ovulation day 'normal'?

I discovered my ovulation day was fluctuating more than normal. This changes the window obvs. If that is the case; sex every other day through the whole two middle weeks is better than waiting for the magic 3 or 4 days IIRC.

Give it another 6 months do all that you can to conceive naturally
It cost me 22k to have my two kids, I put in two stone ( thanks steroid drugs) plus the Increased risk of cancer with all the drugs

@Tallgreenbottle

Whether or not IVF is “worth it” is entirely subjective. Not for any one person to decide for anyone else.

@Tallgreenbottle have you actually had IVF yourself? My rounds hasn't impacted negatively on my relationship with DH or my family and has given me beautiful DS. I'm sorry if that hadn't been your experience but it is an individual choice.

Hi OP, haven’t rtft sorry but how long have you been off hormonal contraception? It took awhile for my cycles to settle down after stopping the pill, in fact I came off the pill in June 2013 and we started trying in the December but my periods still hadn’t regulated, it took me 6 months to get pregnant and DS1 was born in February 2015. My second and third pregnancies I conceived within the first month of trying (my second was unsuccessful). I would definitely give it 6 months, keep tracking your cycles and use ov sticks. But try and make time for yourself, go out as a couple etc not so you can “relax” but so ttc doesn’t consume you.

Another vote for pre-seed. It worked for me at 38.

It’s far too early to be considering IVF, especially if your tests look fine. Despite the media hoo- about fertility falling off a cliff after 35, the reality is the vast majority of 37 year olds will conceive naturally within a year of ttc. IVF will not increase your chances at this stage, and as others have said, it is really stressful and expensive. Your clinic sounds ethically dubious, tbh.

You sound very anxious, though, and I would suggest you consider seeing a specialist fertility hypnotherapist to help you manage the stress. You may also be interested to know there is evidence that hypnotherapy doubles the rate of conception for both trying naturally and IVF.

Even if you were younger, 3 months TTC is nothing.

Wait.

If you have already had an "not" i would wait a bit longer. A number of fertility clinics have monthly open days. Whilst still trying you could go and vidit possible clinics so if you decide to eventually go down that route you have made a decision on where to go and know the cost.

At that age I needed clomid to conceive, which was a bit of a battle to get, but worked first time after 18 months ttc.

However 18 months after having ds1 I got pregnant with ds2 with no help whatsoever.

3 months is nothing. After six months however go and see your go who may refer you to fertility consultant where you could possibly try clomid etc. The referral might take a while but there'd be a good chance of you conceiving before you got there. Ttc can be a frustrating business whatever your age. I get that in your late 30s it's easy to panic a bit but at this point you still have every chance of having a baby in the normal way.

I believe that at the age of 37 your success rate for IVF is as low as 23%.

My chance was 26%, at 33, with 2 embryos. I have a healthy 3 year old from our one and only attempt.

OP, I would go for it. Your odds sound great. I may be a one-off, but I found the IVF process really easy. The injections weren’t scary once I got used to it. I was lucky that I had no effects from the drugs, and I know everyone is different. I enjoyed parts of the process. It really wasn’t as bad as some people make out. I think that even if I hadn’t been successful, although I would have been disappointed, I still would say it was fairly easy and straightforward.

Whatever you do, don’t waste precious time. Having a child is truly amazing.

If you’re looking at IVF after just 3 months of trying then you really haven’t grasped how horrendously difficult the process is.

What do your test results actually say? Never mind %, that’s meaningless - what are the figures?

It’s odd isn’t it, a few months back you were talking about naming your baby after your “fertility doctor “. 🙂

I posted earlier, however just to also add: in the (likely) event that ivf doesn't work, it will take months for your body to recover for either conceiving naturally or another round of ivf, making the entire process much longer. Again, definitely try to conceive naturally for another while before considering this.

IVF is divided into two camps - those who it worked for and those for who it didn't.

For the one friend whose IVF cycle did work, it was 'worth it all'.

For the three couples I know whom it didn't work, it was hell. Two have since divorced.

Are you naming your baby after your fertility doctor before it's even been conceived? That sounds a little strange!

Ridiculous. They don’t even consider fertility problems until it has been a year. It takes most people a few months, even younger couples. Three months is seriously nothing. You’d be wasting money.