To want Wedding reading to be a surprise

[Leah2005]

My friend has asked me to do a reading at her wedding. I suggested three pieces and df chose her favourite. She has printed the words in the draft order of service. I would prefer it to be a surprise. Am I being a diva and would Ibu to ask df to produce order of service without the words?

I think most weddings I have been to the reading has been in the Order of Service. I know where you are coming from but it is her wedding and the choice should be hers.

It's her wedding, she can do it however she wants. Did you write the reading?

If it was your wedding, I’d say it would be fine for you to want it to be a secret, but it is her wedding, so I’m afraid you don’t get to have a say.

I assume she wants it in the order of service as a permanent record.

It’s her wants that matter here, not yours - sorry.

You are absolutely being a diva.

Definitely diva territory

Yes, it would be wholly unreasonable to ask your friend to accommodate your preference.

Diva, she’s made her choice, probably has a million other things to sort, please don’t ask her to change it.

Why would you want it to be a surprise - it sounds a bit attention-seeking in someone else's ceremony!. It's normal to have the reading (or at least the title of it) in the order of service IME so I'm not sure about the 'surprise' element.

You are definitely being a diva. For one think it’s totally normal to have the reading printed in the service as a momento. For another, it’s not your wedding and your preferences are irrelevant. It would be wildly expensive to reprint the orders just to suit you. And finally, you doing a reading isn’t about you and your moment to shine. It’s about your friend. You are not the important person in this decision.

(This is probably a reverse isn’t it?)

Why do you want the surprise?

Definitely not ok to ask to change order of service. I fond it easier to focus on the words when I can read along. Otherwise I sometimes find myself daydreaming.

Also I think it is unusual you chose the reading too, bride may find it helpful/thoughtful though.

It's her wedding, what you want is pretty much irrelevant.

I too suspect a reverse.

Although I understand you actually want people to listen to you rather than zone out, you're being a diva I'm afraid. You usually have the readings printed in the OoS, this isn't unusual. And once you're at this stage in the planning wedding stationary becomes a pain in the tits job- you'd be asking her to rejig it (if she's DIY'ing) and find something to fill the space, or go back to her stationary supplier and ask them to make changes which could incur a charge if she's ok'ed the proof. She's probably got enough on her plate without adding this to it.

It’s her wedding and it’s not a surprise to her! Quite strange that you want it to be a surprise to the guests?

Although I understand you actually want people to listen to you rather than zone out

Bloody hell. Does ANYONE listen to wedding readings other than the bride and groom?

They’re usually dull, go on far too long, read by someone unaccustomed to public speaking and just meh.

Diva. It's not about you.

Stop being daft.

It’s not even your wedding! Yes you are being a massive Readerzilla!

Seems a bit weird to have the words printed to me.
I understand saying 1 Corinthians ch13 v1-16 but writing out all the words I would think is unusual.

Reverse? Anyway it’s not your wedding so keep quiet

Diva, their wedding their choice.

Most have the reading printed in case people are hard of hearing, and as a memento

I imagine it’s not a biblical reading but something more personal.

Not sure why you need the element of surprise. Are you expecting gasps and applause?

It won’t be a surprise if it’s either Corinthians or Captain Corelli's mandolin.

No one gives a shit about the reading except the bride & groom and the reader.

I say this as having been in both situations.

You are definitely being a diva.