Aibu to randomly change the spelling of my name?

[TheDarkPassenger]

My name is long I have a ‘Sunday name’, no issues with that spelling at all but no one ever calls me it and people are often shocked it’s my name. Anyway the nickname is also a name.

I’m marrying soon. My nickname spelling looks bloody crap with ohs surname. It’s hard to explain but others agree!
As an example: changing from Jayne to Jane. Both valid spellings (the ‘new’ spelling I would like is much more common and I have constantly spell out my nickname) but the new one looks sooooo good with my new surname, so good.

Can I get away with this?

You need to tell us them names, can’t comment otherwise.

YABU sorry.

Need to know at least the name you want to change. Can understand you might not want to give surname aswell but how can you expect people to give opinions with no info.

Yes it's fine. I used to have a long name which my family shortened. Think Victoria/Vicky/ I chose Vikki and changed it officially. I was about 12 when I changed the way I spelt it, but I was in my 30's before I officially changed it.

So you want to change the spelling of your nick name?

So your name is for eg Elizabeth and you are called Lizzie but you want to change it to Lizzy?

I don't see why not, there's no legal reason you can't change a nick name.

Why on earth would you change your first name to fit with you husband’s surname ?

Wouldn’t it be easier for him to change his surname to match yours ? I’m assuming that the reason you are thinking of this is because you want matching names.

If you won’t want matching names then both keep your own - problem solved.

Some perfect examples on here, I’m really sorry I can’t give my actual name!

I asked my mum and she said ‘I can’t see that anyone will be bothered’

Hahahaha which I suppose is fair enough 😂

Thanks for opinions so far though. I would really love to show you the names because the original name does look frigging shit and you’d see it straight away but I literally can’t I’d be too anxious over someone finding me, I need this place as my little sanctuary

I want to match my kids names :)

Is it just me that doesn’t think spelling affects how well a name goes with a surname? That said, OP - it’s your name, if you prefer it, then do it!

It's your name, do what you like. Just please don't be precious about it when people forget / don't realise etc

Newark before I got engaged I thought the exact same as you, now I’ve written it down I can’t unsee it 😫

Yet another 'name' thread where OP offers a convoluted story which goes all round the houses refusing to tell you any name, hence rendering people's opinions absolutely useless as there's nothing to go on. 'Do you think a name that I'm not going to tell you. Matches another name that I'm also not going to tell you?'

Tiresome.

Oh babyshark I’m not even precious with it now trust me, one of my best friends still spells it wrong and sometimes I just say ‘yeah whatever’ when someone asks me ‘is it ....’ people misspell my current surname all the time too and unless it’s official documents i don’t really mind, I guess that’s a part and parcel of Irish family and names living in the UK 😂

So the nickname isn't your real name? It's like your name is Alexandra, but you're know as Sandy and you want to be Sandi? You can do that regardless can't you? You just start spelling your name differently. Schoolkids do this all the time. I can never keep up with how Olivers are spelling Oli this week

Do you think a name that I'm not going to tell you. Matches another name that I'm also not going to tell you?'

That isn't what OP asked.

Nobody needs to know OP's name to have an opinion on changing spellings.

@positivevibez
Actually I’ve had some pretty good responses here to think about but it was pretty clear from the title what it was about so I’m not sure why you pressed it? But whatever you get your kicks from I guess

Yeah I defintley didn’t ask if the names match because I can honestly hand on my heart tell you they do not. Haha

Get my kicks 😂😂😂

Yes, it's fine to randomly change your nickname. It's a nickname. You can spell it how you want.

So your first name is a word that is also a verb/common noun, and his surname is a noun word, so put them together and they make a phrase of sorts? Eg Carry Baggs or Sandy Bottom and you think Carrie/Sandi would make it less obvious?

I can't figure this out. Do you want to change the spelling of your official forename so that the "natural" shortening goes more nicely with your new surname? Or do you want to leave your official name alone and just change the spelling of your shortening?

Either is completely fine IMO. I am maybe being extra hard of thinking here because I would be completely unbothered about someone using one spelling for their official forename but a different one for their shortening. For example say your real name was Jemma and you currently go by Jems. If you want to change your proper name to Gemma and shorten to Gems that's fine, but it's also fine to stay Jemma and shorten it to Gems.

Why don't you change your user name just for this thread?
Make sure you change it straight back again after this post and no one will be able to connect this thread. Especially if you only mention your first name and nickname.

I have a couple of friends who have changed what they are called over the years various times, or different sets of friends have called them different things. No one is bothered by it, eg Stephen = Steve or Ste

Go for it if it'll make you happy.

If your mum and dad aren’t offended, then surely nobody else should be. Just do it.

As long as you don't get annoyed when people who knew you as old nickname spell it the original way it's fine

I've known a few people do this. I don't think it's a big deal at all, certainly no more consequential than shortening your name or using a nickname in the first place! You can be called what you like and spell it how you like.

Occasionally some people have gotten a bit uptight with them for changing, but those are the kind of people who get really petty and are rigid about following made up social conventions.

Most people won't be that fussed as long as you're clear on how you'd like it spelled.