To think this is abit white single female?

[Itiswhatitisyeah]

Our two DD's go to school together, shes early 20's and I'm early 30's. We have been school gate "friends" for 3 years now. Shes progressively started copying me and it's really ramped up over the past 6 months.

Shes traded her car in for the same car as mine (same colour too), shes had her hair cut into the same style, her partner helped us move into our new home and I heard on the grapevine that shes ordered furniture to match our decor after asking him what our house was like, shes asked her partner to grow a beard because my DH has....... you get the picture.

I was looking for a new job and she tried her hardest to get me to apply to work with her and when I decided to go for another position she was really off with me for weeks. She turns up at my gym classes and everytime I post something on Instagram or Facebook you guarantee that within hours she will have done something similar.

Today shes uploaded a photo of her youngest DD. Her youngest DD has the very long version of my eldest DD'S name. In the post shes shortened it to be the same as my DD'S even though no one knows her youngest by that name. Someone has even commented on the photo saying "who's that?" And shes commented back saying her youngests name and saying shes shortening it! I mentioned it to my co worker today and her face dropped and said I really need to be careful. At first I thought it was because I am older etc but now my co worker has got my thinking - should I be worried?

I don't t know bits its def creepy behaviour

It's been mildly irritating up until now but after shortening her DD's name to match mine I'm now abit concerned!!

Wtf

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, she probably just likes your style...to the extreme lol, dont think she will murder your husband though x

letsrunfar

Ok... what exactly are you concerned about?

Sounds to me like another woman got the same generic car and mum-bob as you, her DH grew the same generic beard and you both post the same inane generic shit on social media... and now you’re looking for copying that doesn’t exist.

Calm your tits, I’m sure your bunny is safe.

I've heard this so many times on here. Identical story.

So all that happened and you didn't once confront her?

I think eyesopenwide got it spot on

Unless your hair is crazy unique and you drive some form of really rare car I dont see how it is stalkerish.

Is your house multi coloured or is it the same average beige / grey / whites most people do at the moment?

How do you know she asked him to grow a beard?

Do you drive a black/white/grey SUV, is your house grey and your furniture from next/John Lewis or is Scandi in style, is your hair a long Bob, maybe with highlights or ambre and is your daughter called Bella per chance? If so YABU she isn't copying you.

If you have a mark one escort, a mohawk, glow in the farm renaissance style furniture and your daughter is called Balonz you might have a point.

*dark

I don't think I'd notice if someone was copying me. Not that they would unless they want a dead husband and to look like they got dressed in the dark.

I can't help thinking it's all a bit narcissistic to assume that someone's behaviour has got anything to do with your own. Perhaps she doesn't even notice your car/hair/husband's beard.

Glow in the farm would be interesting 😂

I’m inclined to agree with pp OP, you’re probably not as unique as all that, and I don’t mean that in a horrid way.

People will scoff at you OP but having witnessed it IRL (not me) I believe you

As I told her, stop feeling creeped out. Have some fun with it. You could make her do allsorts and buy anything. Think outrageous.

Did you say how good you thought your cat was and as she was looking for a new one she went for the same as you based on how much you seem to like it?

How do you know she has asked her husband to grow a beard?

Is your hairstyle very unique? Could she have thought ‘that looks nice i’ll do similar!’

Does she lack imagination. I had a friend like that, never had an original thought ever. I collected trolls, she collected trolls, I read point horror, she read point horror, my friend did Avon she did Avon my friend did cross stitch she did cross stitch .... she even lost her virginity to my boyfriend (although he was equally to blame). Whatever we did she had to do/have. She had fairly rich parents and if I mentioned some clothing she’d have it a few days later.

She’s now a nurse because that’s what her mum does.

I did actually confront her over the car. It's the exact same make and model, only hers is a year older than mine. So I just said jokingly bloody hell are you trying to be me now and she just went red and laughed.

I know about the beard because her partner is clean shaven and when we were at a school event not long ago, my DH was talking to her partner and her partner said he couldnt put up with having a beard it would irritate him too much but his misses wants him to grow one and keeps on about it.

I just find it really weird that she seems to go out of her way to do things like me. The whole Facebook thing - I will post a pic of me and my children, she will do the same hours later. If I post a pic of me and DH she does the same almost down to the same pose. It's a mighty big coincidence if that's the case

Likethebattle - you could be right in that she lacks imagination

^I mentioned it to my co worker today and her face dropped and said I really need to be careful. At first I thought it was because I am older etc but now my co worker has got my thinking - should I be worried?*

Worried about what, exactly? That she’s going to murder you and assume your identity?

You're just self obsessed and very middle of the road babe. You are every yummy mummy in England, and beards are not original. Get over yourself.

Are you sure you are not reading too much into this? Social media is full of same old same old and like a pp said if you follow current trends ie hair and house so might she. Just distance yourself block if it is bothering you.

you could be right in that she lacks imagination

Maybe you both lack imagination, and you both have the same car, decor, and hairstyle as thousands of other people?

You only have to look around the school yard to see several women with similar hairstyles wearing similar clothes. A quick look on Rightmove is all you need to know that tonnes of houses look very similar inside. Beards are very ‘in’ just now, I see multiple men per day with identical beards.

Or are your car, home and hair particularly idiosyncratic?

Awwww she has a girl crush. I have a girl crush She has great style and I love everything in her house and everything she does. I don't actually copy her though because I'm not a psychopath.

You haven’t told us what exactly you’re worried about?

I don't actually copy her though because I'm not a psychopath.

Did you know that you can share stuff on Facebook to just select people? Better do two or more, so it shows as ‘shared with friends’ rather than ‘shared with you’.

So if I was you... I’d do a little testing to see just how far she will go. I’m thinking daft photos, holidays booked, sofas bought etc...

It's narcissistic personality disorder :/ Had a 'friend' like her in my student days. Started with little things...like she started cut her hair like me...I said I was thinking of getting a tattoo, she runs out and gets one first ect… the progressed to flinging herself at men I liked and asking if my workplace were 'looking for management?' (she and I had the same qualifications and I most certainly was not a manager lol). It gets worse and worse until its so blatent that you stop making excuses for it and can't ignore it anymore.

Should you be worried? Hmm...not if you are cool with having an enemy who wants to compete with everything you do as a friend. They are fecken horrible people and don't let anyone tell you she has low selfesteem or you should 'take it as a compliment' because that is a load of crap. She has a cluster b personality disorder, she is toxic, fecken drop her like a hot coal and block her from as much of your life as possible. Or next she will be flirting with your husband and gunning for your job.