Argument over bike helmet - DS13

[GoldenNoodle]

Am I being unreasonable to insist that ds13 wears a helmet when he rides his bike? It has always been the rule that he wear one. He says that none of his friends do - which as far as I can tell, is true. He is on his bike all the time, riding to school and out with friends. He says that everyone is laughing at him and he's the only one who has to wear a helmet.

Dh is sympathetic to ds and says I should relax my rule. However, I'm not sure I could ever forgive myself if anything happened to him.

Ds is an experienced rider and has done the cycling proficiency test.

Anyone with biking teenagers - what are your rules? TIA

Honestly, I don't wear one myself so I'd be a bit of a hypocrite if I said YANBU. He certainly wouldn't be doing stunts or anything but just day to day riding around? I'd pick my battles tbh.

<a class="break-all" href="https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DskzmeqPbSUY&ved=0ahUKEwiLheLG7fjiAhWKQEEAHZpdCKYQo7QBCB8wAQ&usg=AOvVaw0cQMXNd3A_BMUKAdUFNkpY" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DskzmeqPbSUY&ved=0ahUKEwiLheLG7fjiAhWKQEEAHZpdCKYQo7QBCB8wAQ&usg=AOvVaw0cQMXNd3A_BMUKAdUFNkpY

You have one head and one brain. In towns cycles often go as fast as motorbikes, 30 miles an hour. As an ex biker I'm surprised helmets are not a legal requirement.

YANBU

... but this points out that car drivers might cause more accidents to cyclists who are wearing helmets!
www.cnet.com/news/brain-surgeon-theres-no-point-wearing-cycle-helmets/

Evidence is that children should wear them.

I have seen this discussion several times on Mumsnet. I am now looking forward to reading about how posters saw someone’s head ‘bounce off the kerb’ but survive the accident thanks to a bike helmet.

No hat no bike. A school friend of mine was left brain damaged after a fairly mild fall off his bike, with no helmet, aged 11.

Point out that professional cyclists ALL wear them.

I was forced to wear a helmet as a teen. As a result I never rode my bike. I've not been on one since I was about 12. It's been 25 years. I do think about what I will do when my own become teens. I may just say to them "as long as I never see you without a helmet".

Show him this:

Ryan Smith's first words after cycling accident without helmet www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-lincolnshire-25086451

I wish they would make it law like Oz

You'd be crazy nuts if you caved in on this one.
My step father's nephew aged 11 died after being hit by a car, apparently if he had a helmet he would have survived- the mother to this day still blames herself.

Besides, you can get really cool looking helmets these days

Back in my university days, I worked for the uni paper and a student was doing an article about the importance of helmets for children. I often took photos for various articles and I accompanied this student writer to a children's brain trauma unit where several parents of the patients had agreed to participate in the article to promote the use of helmets. That day I saw SEVEN children who were permanently and severely disabled because of accidents on their bikes and not wearing a helmet. It was horrifying and devastating beyond words.

My children are young adults now, but they were never allowed to not wear a helmet, and there would have been serious consequences if they were caught without one. I wouldn't give 2 shiny shits what those other kids are allowed to do/not do. That's their parents responsibility. Your son is YOUR responsibility.

I have a DS13 who cycles to school. It's a no hat no ride rule here.

If anyone ridicules him he's been told to say it's the idiot who doesn't wear one.

Our friends BIL died as a result of a head injury when cycling and not wearing a helmet.

It's just not worth it. One day it will become law just like wearing seat belts did in the 1970s and then rear seat belts followed.

He does some tricks on his bike off road, mainly wheelies don't get me started on that one. He rides to school mainly on the pavement as the roads are ridiculously busy.

He is really upset with me and I feel terrible as he is such a great kid and normally very happy to go along with most rules.

I used to work with someone who cycled to work. Someone opened a car door on her once as she was riding along - she went flying. She always maintained that her helmet saved her life and that has really stuck with me.

He can go on a hundred cycle courses but it's the car drivers you need to worry about

I tell our son that the car driver will always be ok but that he could die or be paralyzed or mentally injured in a bike accident. It's just not worth the risk

I didn't wear a helmet myself but I do now. I don't want to get a brain injury.

Sorry - cross posted with loads of you.

I am finding this reassuring to read. I might show him the thread.

He is so convinced that his skill will prevent him from falling but I keep telling him that won't save him from other people/bad luck.

Golden yes that's the tack to take. We said he can be the model cyclist but it takes one person late for work to ruin his life. They will get away with a fine possibly but he may have life long injuries

We also make him have a hi vis cover on his rucksack too.

You get one life

You could get him to inform himself at cyclehemets.org

Worry less about the wheelies, as long as he is wearing a helmet, but he is breaking the law riding on the pavement and he is a hazard to pedestrians.

I work for the governing body and we have over a hundred staff who regularly ride to work, as well as many others who BMX, MTB, road and track ride. I only know one member of staff who won't wear a lid and everyone thinks he's stupid. We also have a large number of pro riders of all disciplines - again, they wouldn't get on a bike without a helmet.

I once rode across a ford that was flooded and slipped on the slimy concretely and went down. I wasn't going fast but I banged the back of my head so hard on the concrete that it shattered my helmet. I remember thinking, "that could have been my skull".

There are some decent skateboard-style helmets - would he give one of those a go? Our riders call them skid lids www.cyclesurgery.com/p/bern-watts-eps-helmet-P1134018.html?colour=97

Would you let him ride a motorbike with no helmet?
No helmet, no bike, its that simple, head injuries kill.

YANBU, definitely on roads with cars, that's an accident waiting to happen. I would be locking it and confiscating the lock. I am a pretty lax parent on rules, but road safety is a no brainer.

I am shocked it is illegal not to wear a bike helmet in the UK in this day and age. I am in NZ and it became illegal many years ago, my DD once got a fine! That soon taught her...

You can recommend that a teenager wears a helmet when cycling, but realistically you have no way of knowing whether they comply.

For all you know, they remove the helmet as soon as they are out of sight of the house, and hang it on the handlebars.

Chokaholic - he has a great helmet that I got him for skateboarding. He has customised it with skater stickers.

This thread has helped me stay firm! Thank you.

TheFirst - that is a good point. Maybe I'm being naive, but I don't think he is doing that - I've told him in the past that if I ever see him without it or hear that he's not wearing it, his bike will go.

No helmet = no bike.
My DCs complained they had no choice in the matter when they were younger but they had the same choice that I had. I dislike bike helmets but wore one because I expected them to.
I saw a family out on their bikes the other day, two primary age pupils with helmets on their own bikes, Dad with no helmet and pre-school child on a bike seat between the handlebars and saddle with no helmet