AIBU in thinking about having 3 legs.

[Mysterian]

If you had 3 legs with the accompanying 3 buttocks, do you think you would have a bum hole in both the valleys, or just in one? And which crack would it be in? Would it be random or would left handed people have a left bum hole and righties a right bum hole?

And if the extra leg is central, would the big toe be in the middle of the 5, or would there be a big one on each end?

Or maybe the third leg comes out the back at the bottom of your spine and goes backwards so you stand like a tripod, and if so would the foot on it face backwards?

These are all very important thoughts.

You cover bumholes but what about fannies?

That's exactly why I started this thread @KindergartenKop. To explore all aspects of three leggedness in readiness.

It's the second one -the third leg comes out the back and gives you extra balance. Your fanjo is still at the front but you don't have a bum hole. Like the Queen.

The hole should be central, so the cracks would be fully ken-doll style and the bumhole settled in a dimple in the middle cheek.
As for toes I would go with the toe in the middle and the rest staggered so the foot was triangular, for symmetry

The important point would be the paper usage on wiping.. if you had two butt holes, how would that logistically work?
Wipe both? Just in case.

Like the song goes: You gotta have a bum hole. Otherwise you just get bigger.

The Isle of man flag may have some clues?

well cows have 4 legs and 4 stomachs, so 3 bumholes seems like it would be the correct science here.

Maybe you could control which hole opened? Only one to wipe at a time. One bum hole for everyday use and the other for special occasions.

How would sex work? Where would the spare leg go?

Would men have two willies?

What about a triangular formation, two at the back and one at the front with one bum hole behind and a sort of double formation fanny at the front. I haven't fully thought through the male version ...

@Mysterian

You OK hun?

I'm OK. Just want to be prepared.

2 rude bits at the front each? Tricky enough with one bit though.

How did Rolf Harris manage?

I would definitely want it to come with an extra fanny

feels slightly faint imagining the possibilities

Currently picturing very weird standing up sex with third leg over partners shoulder.....

How would you ride a bicycle?

Side saddle like on horse back?

Well, how many bum holes do cows have? I feel this is key.

Wait, was this on an A Level biology paper? It’s been that kind of year.

Is this what the MN logo is attempting to demonstrate - the possessing of multiple limbs (and heads, for that matter)? I've never been able to fully ascertain

Would the tone emitted from each bumhole when emitting noxious gases be identical, or would they be clearly distinct from each other? Would a highly skilled Petomaine be capable of believably emulating the siren of an emergency vehicle? Imitating a police officer is currently an offence, but would a new crime be added to the statute books of anally imitating a police car?

These are vital questions that will need to answered satisfactorily by BoJo or Hunt as a matter of urgency, as soon as he assumes office. Otherwise, that way lies anarchy.

I think the tripod theory works best, with just a rounded off foot (no toes) but I think the foot should still face forwards. One fanjo at the front and no bumhole

How would you ride a bicycle?

Side saddle like on horse back?

The day of the bicycle will be gone forever.

We will urgently need to breed a new strain of tiny little micro-camel (bactrian only, of course) for all human transport requirements and learn to sit facing sideways.

One fanjo at the front and no bumhole

No crap, Columbo!!