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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

do you tip?

122 replies

theman · 25/07/2007 15:11

just wondering.if it's been done before i apologise and will ask for the thread deleted. just wondering what the general consensus is in the uk and among other poster.

OP posts:

SweetyDarling · 26/07/2007 11:04

Tipping has always (IME) been the norm in Sydney.
Don't know if I would guage Australians' reputations by the opinion of a Tukish shoe-shiner - he probably thought you were from Austria! I think Aussie travellers' reputations are also often skewed because so many Australians travel very young so behave differently (get drunk, skrimp and save etc) from some other groups.

FireFaerie · 26/07/2007 11:38

About 3 months ago i started working for a supermarket. I have also had experience working as a waitress. I would rather be a waitress.
I live in a very posh area, and i have friends that work in the nearby restaurants and cafes. Working in the supermarket is just as hard work. I deal with rude and obnoxious customers who look down their noses at me as if i am scum, when im working hard instead of sitting on the dole, spending all of my precious time with my DS (which i would rather be doing if it wasnt for pride and money) If i help a dear elderly lady who has arthritis pack her shopping at the kiosk then the posh bloke behind her will make no move to put his own shopping in his own carrier. He will stand there and look at me like a goldfish. If he would just ask nicely i would happily pack for him i.e: I can never open these bags, could you give me a hand? Its the presuming that annoys.
I also have to clean the checkout regularly, deal with arsey drunks as its illegal for me to serve them alcohol if they are already drunk, and all sorts of other things that have to be done as part of the job.
This is my job. I do it all as i am paid to do it. I am polite and well mannered because that is who i am as a person, and it doesnt pay to be rude for no reason.
I am not saying i deserve to be tipped, i am just merely trying to point out that i work just as hard as a waitress dealing with similar customers, and it gets on my nerves hearing that someone else who is actually on a higher rate of pay than me anyway, deserves a tip without question, yet i, also without question, dont.
I hope that makes sense

SweetyDarling · 26/07/2007 11:46

Agree FF, def not deserved without question.

Original poster

theman · 26/07/2007 12:24

"theman you are being very narrowminded and not thinking about teh actual people who do the jobs. They have to do far more than just pur collect and clean your glass. They can easily have to stay in a bar for 2 hours after the bar shuts to clean up, deal with rude people, wipe lipstick off every glass and polish every wine glass. It might not sound like much but its a damnsight harder than a supermarket checkout. "

sorry but how is it narrowminded to not expect to have to pay the bar staffs wages twice?
i worked in bars all through my teens so i know exactly what bar staff do and how long you have to stay behind cleaning up after a service. but in all my years working there i never expected a tip, if someone wanted to give me extra cash just for doing my job great but if not i didn't think they were stingy.as i said before no one forced me to take the job, i got offered a wage by the pubs and accepted to work for that wage.

"so.... theman - are you are regular customer anywhere where tipping would be the norm? If so what kind of service do you get? "

i get fantastic service in my local pub and most of the restaurants i'd frequent. it just goes to show the detrimental effect that the tipping culture has had if you expect me to receive substandard service just because i do not tip, surely these people should have enough pride in their work to not only treat those who are paying them extra.

OP posts:

FireFaerie · 26/07/2007 12:26

There was no need to be rude though, was there..
Im sorry, i should quit now. Jeez!

FireFaerie · 26/07/2007 12:27

Sorry, not rude, just uncalled for.

MotherFunk · 27/07/2007 04:17

Message withdrawn

MKG · 27/07/2007 04:34

I'm in the US and unfortunately we tip for everything.

Personally
restaurant 20% (in a lot of places waitresses have to give a certain percentage of their tips to the bar, because alcohol is what drives up the price, plus dh is a cook and I know how much crap waitresses put up with)

Hair 20% mainly because I went to high school with my hairdresser and they always do a good job.

Waxing I'm not sure but I leave a $5 for a 12 dollar wax so almost 50%, but I've been going to the same person for 5 years and have never had my skin torn off. If I'm trusting someone with my face, the deserve a big tip.

Original poster

theman · 27/07/2007 15:33

"What i actually said was that legally they do not have to serve you. They are actually paid to do lots and lots of things, serving you is just one of them. And they do have a legal right to refuse service to anyone, for any reason (or infact, no reason at all)"

what's your point? everyone has a legal right not to serve you in absolutely every industrry.they are not serving you out of the kindness of their heart they are serving you because they are paid to do so.of course they can refuse, but lets see how many bar men will keep their job when managment find out they are refusing to serve anyone who is not paying them extra untaxed wages.

OP posts:

nappyaddict · 27/07/2007 15:40

some people even tip me if they have complained about their food. in fact recently a table had complained about their food, were really annoyed and then at the end i must have looked very shocked when they tipped me and they said oh we know it's not your fault the chef can't cook properly

i was over the moon cos it does annoy me when people take it out on the waitress when for example how is it my fault the chef is taking so long to cook your god damn food!!

binklehasflipped · 27/07/2007 15:43

yes - 10% always or more - unless the service was rude and crap

binklehasflipped · 27/07/2007 15:45

but, I will deduct the 'discretionary' service charge if it is automatically added on. every time.

nappyaddict · 27/07/2007 15:48

in some places there is an automatic service charge though. we have it for parties of 8 or more.

lissie · 27/07/2007 15:58

i have worked in restaurants/bars all my working life and im a bit shocked at some of the attitudes to tipping. yes the staff are paid, but often the bare minimum. as a restaurant manager i never got tips (i had bonuses instead) and neither did the chefs, tips were for the waiting staff to make up for working every friday/saturday night. often til 3 am, keeping a smile on their face while some tosser who takes home their monthly pay in a week sneers at them for doing such a "menial, easy job". tips are a form of performance related pay and as a waitress i relied on them. i got tipped well because i was good at my job, even when some drunk f*ckwit tried to feel me up because i was "there to serve"!

lissie · 27/07/2007 16:01

and btw waiting staff tend to remember if you tip well/at all

eleusis · 27/07/2007 16:05

I always leave a tip if there is a service provided that is beyond what I have already paid for. In a restaurant I am paying for the food. If the water waitress does an exception job of enhancing the experience (for example is knowledgable about the food and can offer some recommendation then she/he gets a higher tip). If I say "What's in the vegetable soups" And she says "vegetables" then she gets a lower tip than if she says "Oh I think it's carrots, beans, and potatoe in a vegetable broth, but hang on I'll go check with the chef" then kaching up goes the tip. Basically, I tip to match the service.

However, I think Starbucks is taking the mick with their tip jar. There is no service I go up to the counter and get it mself. I might stick some spare change in there because I can't be bothered to put it back in my purse, but that's about it.

hermykne · 27/07/2007 16:08

lissie
we're u paid minimum wage and were you put thru the books of the places you worked in?

if not and you werent tipped perhaps its the restaurnat owners who need slapping but if you were, what difference is waitressing (bar working nights)to shop serving were i give a whole lot my customers and didnt get tipped and my salary was minimum then.

lissie · 27/07/2007 16:08

thats why the chefs didnt get tips. they get paid to cook the food, a LOT more than waiting staff, agree with the starbucks thing tho.

lissie · 27/07/2007 16:11

im not saying that hermkynei was paid min wage (when it was bought in) and didnt expect tips at a lunchtime. but of an evening shift (as i said often finisg=hing about 3am)its a bit different.

lissie · 27/07/2007 16:12

tbh i think it's the working nights thing thats the key issue here.

MotherFunk · 27/07/2007 19:16

Message withdrawn

nappyaddict · 29/07/2007 12:43

most bar/waiting staff couldn't afford to live if they didn't get tips. this week i have done 42 hours. through my wages i will get just over £200. the cheapest rent is about £140 so you'd have just over £60 to buy food and pay bills. not easy is it!

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