Am I being precious to hate it when people say they are going to steal my DD?

[Speckledfroggys]

We have an amazing little toddler DD. She's so lovely and happy and we love her to bits. Family often say "oh we're going to kidnap her" or "we'll take her home and you can take our (pet, goldfish, their DC whatever) instead" and I really hate it!

I always read threads where people are complaining about what their MIL wants to be called to DC or their DM kissing their grandkids or whatever and think it is unreasonable but this one gets me - is it me? We love her to bits and objectively think we're good parents - why do people keep saying it?!

I reckon I'm just being a total precious loon but felt the need to make a thread about it.

I read this back and thought to myself "obviously they aren't being serious so you are BU" so there we have it

I do hate it when it is said over and over and over though!

Would it help to reframe it as a compliment towards your DC and how you are raising them?

Blimey, you are totally overthinking this

They clearly adore her and it’s lighthearted. Is it family members you don’t particularly like anyway? That might be the crux of it.

And why on earth would you see it as a reflection on your parenting?

I do think you're being a bit precious, they're only saying that she's adorable really. BUT I feel a bit uncomfortable when people say they want to bite my niece's cheeks or "eat her all up" so I get it a bit!

Can’t get worked up about this.
And it’s a compliment really.
They’re welcome to take my child, they would soon return her.

It would irritate me too but YABU to not understand that they are only saying it as they think she is gorgeous and people say daft things.

Aw, bless you! I can guarantee that if any of them do ever manage to steal your DD, they'll return her by bedtime!

We love her to bits and objectively think we're good parents

Why do you interpret a joke by family members about “stealing” your child as undermining your being “good parents”?

Said often enough, it could get one dull, I grant you.

I get this, competely OTT and irrational but I hate when people, even my own mum who is incredibly easy going and lovely, joked about stealing my DS

The thought of it is so awful that my brain won't allow it to be processed as a joke

I was fine with my easily conceived DD, but my hard won DS no way! Weird

People say this about my DD- I take it as a compliment, she is pretty cute.

Besides they’d return her PDQ once she began one of her tantrums!

I do see where you’re coming from. It’s the nuance. It’s something you’re completely unable to respond to so it’s really awkward. What are you supposed to say? “! No don’t! POLICE!” Or, “Well you’re very welcome.” It might just be that. I always feel a bit irked when my PIL put me in a position where I have nowhere to take the conversation and they do it a lot!

Gosh yes your email being precious. It’s a turn of phrase . Not literal.

I've said this before, about babies/puppies/kittens.
I hadn't really given much thought to how annoying/twee it is.

If it helps, though, it's absolutely meant as a compliment and nothing else. (Unless your relatives have a history of being particularly PA). In fact, if someone were a poor parent IMO, I probably wouldn't say it for fear of it coming across in the wrong way.

It’s just a sweet, innocuous way of saying how much they love your DD. It’s a common phrase and meant to be playful, absolutely not a comment on your parenting.

Christ.

I usually say yes, we’re quite fond of her/him/it ourselves smile and that’s that.

Don’t overthink it.

What about when people say of a baby that they could eat them?

Didn’t meant to bold that.

It’s just a sweet, innocuous way of saying how much they love your DD. It’s a common phrase and meant to be playful, absolutely not a comment on your parenting.

This. It's no different to the people who say 'He/she is so gorgeous I could eat them up' Believe it or not they don't mean it literally.. it's a compliment.

Now I want to vote!

Stealth boast.

Stealing your child means she is totally adorable. It says nothing about your parenting. I have said this about adorable babies.