...to ask for your help in cutting down drinking?

[LoopyLou1981]

I feel ridiculous asking this as a grown woman who should be able to sort this out but I’m struggling and thought someone might have a genius idea that I haven’t come up with.
I don’t want to stop drinking entirely (part of my job is entertaining/lunches and I enjoy that part of it) but we’ve got into a rut of drinking Friday-Sunday and, more often than not, that turns into nearly a bottle of wine each.
Every week I tell myself that I won’t drink the next weekend but, by the time Friday comes around I’m all set for a relaxing glass of wine at the end of a working week. Then it snowballs and I end up drinking every other night weekend.
If someone could even give me a strategy for just having one night of drinking that would help. Or how to stop at one glass?
My weight is starting to creep up and I know if I can kerb the drinking it would help.
TIA

Been doing the same op. It's a nasty little habit that creeps up. Willpower and being honest. Plus I use myfitnesspal and drinksware to keep me mindful

I’m a bit the same. I’ve stared buying those mini bottles so I can only have one/two small glasses. For me it’s the weight that my main concern.

Do you mean a bottle of wine each over the entire weekend?

No. A bottle each per night. 😕

Small bottles sounds like a plan. I’ll have a look at those x

There used to be a thread on here about cutting back on drinking, full of posters doing exactly what you are trying to do. It was called something like Damp January (instead of dry January). Might be worth a search. It was full of tips, etc, and was quite inspiring/helpful to read.

I've cut down massively and lost weight as a result. I think the word 'relaxing' is key here. Yes wine is relaxing, but so are other things - a bubble bath, candles, box sets, a hot drink, whatever works for you. When I feel like a drink I quickly do something else relaxing. Some of the time it doesn't work, most of the time it does. Also, if you are a gin drinker, those bottles of alcohol free gin are really nice with tonic and a slice.

I find if I do exercise in the evenings I don't think about drinking.

Up to recently I would drink a bottle, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Sometimes I would crack and have a bottle on Thursday. Far too much.

I no longer drink on Thursdays. On Friday I had a vodka, lime and soda, Saturday tea, and last night one of the little bottles of wine (a glass). I feel great today instead of grumpy, sluggish and tired. I was aware my wine dependance was creeping up and I've gained 2 stone over the last 18 months so I'm dieting.

Do you think that you have a drink problem or that you have slipped into a bit of a bad habit? I think it sounds like the latter. How about booking a fun class with your DH like learning to dance?

Thank you for all the great tips! I thought I was going to get told to get torn apart and told I was out of control!
To be honest the thought of spending some time chilling out in a bath is amazing! I never think to do something like that. Might treat myself to a nice candle 😊

We are the same. I don't/didn't even drink as much as 14 units but I was getting so tired of every weekend being Friday/Saturday or even Thursday or Sunday as well. We drink red wine so I'd feel really heavy and sluggish all weekend, and like the poster above, it's my weight as well that concerns me. In the end, we've just gone cold turkey- day 16 so far! But we won't go teetotal, I think Dh will Drink next week (I probably won't).

I'd love to say I feel amazing, but I don't feel any different. I'm not sleeping any better, and I compensated for not drinking by eating loads of crap to cheer myself up! I am hoping that another few weeks will really help (although then it's my birthday, then holiday....etc etc and so it begins)

I'd actually recommend stopping entirely for a while. I've done that and it's really helped me get perspective over how I feel about drinking. I honestly would not go back to drinking at work events now - I discovered they're actually easier without the alcohol and no one notices I'm not drinking anyway.

You don't have to do it forever but I personally think you have to stop for a bit to understand when you are actually enjoying drinking and when you are drinking because everyone else is / you feel you should.

I think you should start by going for a dry 3 month period. If that is easy enough then consider the small bottles, ultimately though you'd be better off getting professional support as that sounds very extreme drinking for lunches, nights out and every night at the weekend.

3 months off sounds like a good idea. I’ve done 9 months off twice before so I know I can do it! It’s just unfortunate that the results of those two 9 month stints are now causing part of my stress related drinking! 😂

I'd second the exercise suggestion- whenever I do any exercise in the evening I seem to eat healthier and not want a drink. I think it also gets you out of the routine of drinking. I was coming home from and the routine was a glass of wine while making dinner (which would be fine, but when you team that with weekend drinking too it's too much). Going out to do some exercise took me out of that routine. The exercise is "on pause" for now 😂 but I am able to cook after work without wine still.

I've also tried drinking soft drinks out of a wine glass - sparkling water with lime, ginger ale but that wasn't so successful...

I would get one of the small 250 ml bottles for Friday night (don't buy two!). Wait until after 9.30 p.m. until you drink it and probably by the time you have finished shops will be close and/or you won't want to go out to buy another.
I can't drink at all due to medication and have found some of the non-alcoholic wines and beers to be okay as a substitute.

Change your routine - if you usually drink while cooking for example, get DH to cook

Delay the first drink to as late as possible

Make sure you and DH are on the same page. My DH has actually stopped drinking, i haven't at all but because he isn't reaching for a wine and pouring me one at the same time, my consumption has dropped dramatically.

Count the calories - honest, when you see that the bottle of wine is more cals than dinner, it helps!

Took me 90 days off completely to feel the benefits (sleep etc) but the lack of hangovers was instantly helpful!

Some great tips here. I don't drink at all now but I know friends who have got their drinking right down - thing is, we're all different and so of course different things work.

For me:

• Not putting myself under pressure and setting myself up to fail; just saying I''m going to take a break to reassess stuff for a while (was aiming for 100 days), not 'I will never drink again' or 'I am going to cut right down'. But for some people having a strong goal like that IS helpful.
• Reading lots of quit lit. the well-written ones (The Joy of Being Sober, The Sober Diaries).
• Finding other things - AF beer, trendy tonic waters in lots of nice flavours with ice and slice, cups of tea, nice snacks, running baths etc to stop that habit of 'kids to bed, sit down and unwind with a beer'. Breaking the association of booze with relaxing.
• Support, support and more support. I used Club Soda, which is for those going alcohol free and wanting to do 'mindful' drinking.

Good luck.

Hmm...dh to cook while I’m lounging in the bath...this is sounding like a perfect solution! 😁

try a nice bottlegreen elderflower cordial and fizzy water - the thing is, if it's the calories that are the problem, it might not help. If it's the alcohol, then it will

I used to like a drink but found myself in that irritating habit until medical problems happened in other areas so my liver was struggling. I hated the sitting with my soft drink around people who were drinking.

So I started to experiment with the none alcohol drinks.. I did think they were a waste of time but I've found a couple of firm favourites and even though I can drink alcohol again I've just stuck to the none alcoholic stuff mostly. It totally broke the habit.

I must admit I'm pretty shocked, I could drink like a sailor once.

I just went cold turkey. Like you I was regularly sinking bottles of wine in an evening over the weekend (and sometimes during the week). I had a lot of weight to lose, so I just cut it out the same time I started to track calories. The benefit has been immense - my skin is so much better, I have more energy and my resting heart rate has come down massively. I slept better and I don't miss it at all - I went out on Saturday and could have drank but just didn't fancy it after being nearly 2 months sober.

I too have a little one so know how compelling a glass of wine is to feel relaxed in the evening. But genuinely, I feel so much better for not having it.

Is there anything you want to buy that costs a bit more? Maybe stick a tenner in a jar every time you don’t buy a bottle of wine and buy that thing you want after X amount of weeks?

Also, there are some pretty decent non alcoholic wines you can get. You could even do half and half in each glass with real wine?

Can you go out somewhere instead? Take a book to a local costa that opens late and have a hot chocolate or something?

I always found that the whole procedure of making tea was sort of a reasonably good patch on wine.

Now that it's summer, you could walk to a fancy shop in the evening and get a coffee or tea? (decaf as necessary - I need help to stay away so drink coffee at night).