to not want to shake hands with all my students every lesson

[DrSeuss]

New directive from on high at the school where I teach. As of next September, all staff must greet staff at the door (most, including me, do this already) and offer a handshake, fist bump or high five to each child.

I don't really want to and can see so many pitfalls.

1. Some of my students have ASD. Social interaction for them is difficult at the best of times.
2. A couple are survivors of abuse. Touch is a major issue for them.
3. At least a quarter are Muslims. Touch between adults and children past the age of puberty is a major issue. I have no wish to give offence and am more than happy to respect their faith.
4. Bodily autonomy. Why/how do I compel them to shake my hand?
5. quite a few will just see it as another reason to be difficult or play the clown. I expect numerous "near misses" which they will find hilarious even if I refuse to react.
6. DD, aged 15, thinks it's ridiculous. She's fairly average. If she hates it, they probably all will.
7. I know where their hands go and suspect how little they are washed! What am I supposed to do, shake thirty hands then use hand sanitiser in front of them? How will that "foster good relationships"?

As I say, this is for all staff, it is a directive from SLT and I don't see how I can just ignore it. They have form for actively watching to see if such directives are followed. Any ideas appreciated, thanks!

No way I would do that! I love my students and really enjoy my time with them but ewwwww... all those germs!

Will SLT also shake hand with all students too?
How can you force someone to have a physical contact with someone else when potentially these 2people do not want to do it?

Yuk yuk yuk...

Just what prats dream up this bollix?..

It can help a lesson get off to a good start/atmosphere but only if it’s natural.

I did it - at beginning and usually the end too. But that was me, my idea. No missive from my youngers and betters!

It was more a greeting, a presence at the door. Not a choice of handshake, hug, high 5, fist bump etc.

This is sometimes the trouble with SLT ( or more often SMT). They’ve seen something, read something and then you all have to do it.

Children see through it when everybody does it - and so it looses its impact.

We had to do a range introductory activities - or party games as some of us called them.

Those who came up with the initiative were put on pedestals, go and visit their lesson etc etc.

So what happened when it came to OFSTED - the older traditional teachers got the outstandings, the flash ones on pedestals got requires improvements.

What will happen if you just point blank refuse to do it. They can’t sack you over it. That’s what I would do. Happy to offer a generic ‘good morning everyone’ but that’s it. I would have HATED this as a pupil.

My school tried this.

To my knowledge a few more people stood at the door offering individual hellos but nobody touched anyone!

It died a death approx 2 weeks —seconds— after the INSET day.

You don’t have to touch anyone you don’t want too. And that is the kind of language you should use if some SLT goon takes you up on it.

‘Why are you so insistent I touch the children?’
‘Don’t I have a right to bodily autonomy?’
‘Dont you think your obsession with me touching the children is inappropriate’

Etc etc

It’s a bit gobsmacking that a school is so lacking in cultural awareness as to have overlooked the Muslim angle. How can they be so clueless?

No idea who Paul Dix is but he sounds like a dick.

I think it’s a good idea. The fact so many of you feel awkward suggests handshakes aren’t something you aren’t used to. Like everything awkward it requires practice.Public speaking is horrible but being able to do it well is a skill.
Handshaking is very normal greeting, more so for men maybe. Its a sign of trust, confidence and good manners. Really noticeable that my state school son hardly ever shakes hands yet his friends in private school are happy to do a firm handshake with eye contact.

Totally agree about the thought of grotty hands although I think a bit of hand sanitizer afterwards should work wonders.

Paul Dix came to our school. He hated me.

A simple greeting at the door, with or without handshake, is sufficient. Being forced to shake hands is uncomfortable for both pupils and staff. I tried it, didn’t like it, so now just smile and say, ‘Hello,’ as pupils enter the room. I’d email SLT and the Union with your list of concerns and suggest doing this instead.

Bit rude there.

Handshaking 30 grubby teens in a row is a world away from giving a firm shake to colleague/client or politely greeting an old friend with a friendly handshake.

"What is wrong with coming in in an orderly fashion, sitting down and then being greeted by the teacher?"

This. World gorn mad.

OP my DH is a teacher and comes home with some weird shit like this just about every week. It would be funny if it wasn't so stressful for teachers who are just trying to do their jobs while having gimmicky shit thrown at them constantly.

Social media..!

My dd’s class do this in primary school - 5 mins in the morning when they are pretty slow anyway.

Doesn’t work time wise in secondary. I want my child learning Chemistry rather than lining up to smile at someone she dislikes at the beginning of every 40 minute lesson

I'm another that has seen it on FB and thought that I would have loathed that as a child.
Although I think the ones where you have a child doing the greeting is probably worse. Firstly as the greeter you get no choice, but in real life, off the FB videos, you'd really get at best the enthusiast greeting with the popular crowd and halfhearted at best with less popular. It would remind children every morning that they weren't popular.

Fuck that for a game of soldiers.

It is stupid on lots of levels

1. Queues of kids waiting outside rooms causing chaos in overcrowded corridors
2. False, overly familiar forced contact will make some staff and students uncomfortable
3. Opportunity for pissing about at start
4. Kids waiting in class for teacher to finish greeting the rest of the class does not make for a calm, purposeful start
5. Over complicating something as simple as saying hello to the kids or smiling or building up a normal relationship.

Just occurred to me....if your leadership has bought into this soft stuff...Has anybody asked the students what THEY think (and, by extension, the parents). You know how it is, if the kids/parents object they will take notice. It'll only take a few rumblings from the more vocal ones for this to be scaled down to the more sensible "be welcoming" method.

Well Pivotal Education Ltd. looks a bit dodgy Paul Dix and other company officers left in 2017, now only three american directors left. I would be very suspicious of these people.

beta.companieshouse.gov.uk/company/04201125/officers

They have not submitted a return since 2017, I hope your school are not paying them

beta.companieshouse.gov.uk/company/04201125/filing-history

Yet the website still names Paul Dix as a director curiouser and curiouser.

pivotaleducation.com/about-us/

Yuck yuck yuck! I’m a hugger, but absolutely only with certain people. I hate handshakes, because my perverted father used to do the pervy handshake. My hand feels dirty just thinking about it. 🤢

I don’t work in a school, but wanted to offer my opinion based on my experience of working in France as an adult... its the cultural norm to handshake EVERYDAY when you greet your colleague/boss and I found it so bizarre after one a few days. It’s really not part of our societal norms to do that, so to do it in a school just seems odd! Also I was a good student and I would have hated it.. especially the teachers I disliked.. high-5? Er no.

Tony Jace now is the director of Pivotal Education, an interesting person.

www.crisisprevention.com/About-Us/Meet-The-Team/Tony-Jace

The other two directors are lawyers in San Francisco.

Hope the school plan to leave alcohol gel on everyone's desks so the combined germs of 30 or 40 others from the teachers hand can be dealt with. The poor teacher will become a walking contaminant after the first few handshakes.

My children were at prep school where they did this at the beginning and end of the day. It was a very mannerly thing to do and children often go a 'well done' for some item or other through the day as they left class. They didn't just shake hands but said 'Good morning' or 'Good afternoon Miss Smith'. They were also expected to hold doors open for others and wait their turn in queues etc.
As far as |I know they do the same or similar in Senior private schools too.
Both of my children are Autistic and my DS has sever problems with touching but he had no problem with this. I also don't remember the |Muslin pupils having a problem with it or perhaps they had a way of acknowledging each other.

sigh
Does Paul Dix - or your SMT - know that greetings are at the highest end of "communication load"; that is, the stress placed on anxious communicators by different types of communication? My son is autistic and has social anxiety, low profile selective Mutism (can sometimes answer briefly but doesn't initiate) and touch aversion. He is almost always unable to return greetings. I have not hugged him or held his hand for 8 or 9 years - because I respect his bodily autonomy. Having to to do forced greeting WITH physical contact multiple times a day would cause a mental collapse within days and I would fully expect school refusal within a week.

The school must make reasonable adjustments to this policy for disabled students (ie autistic students who are touch averse or socially anxious) but I suspect that many, many socially anxious kids will die a little death at the start of every fucking lesson. Well done, that SMT, for respecting neurodiversity so marvellously.

not only (some) Muslims but also Orthodox Jews too - & other cultural groups? Has anybody considered the students who have been vaccinated? Most infections are spread by hands touching faces & surfaces - so great - God help you all if there is a flu, meningitis, measles or chickenpox outbreak - I wonder what the NHS would say about this??? & as said previously - what a waste of time! will every teacher of every subject have to do it for each lesson? as said UNIONs

when I was at school (with quaver in voice :) ) we use to stand up for each teacher & say good morning & they would reply good morning (or afternoon) to us & every teacher that entered the class we would stand up - it was courtesy.