AIBU to want a holiday?

[justponderinglife]

I really want to go on holiday but DH is not keen. We haven't been away since before our DS was born and I'm yearning for a break in the sun. I wouldn't mind a cheap and cheerful break somewhere (UK or Europe) but DH thinks this is being frivolous and we should use any money towards more home improvements (we have a money pit of a house!).

We both work part-time at present but will be increasing hours soon so will have increased household income. Will also qualify for childcare funding soon next year. So while things are tight things, the pressure will ease soon.

We split all household costs 50/50. We have credit card debt (from essential home improvements) but this is being paid off on a 0% interest card so is manageable. We don't have savings.

AIBU to want to book a cheapish family break?

It’s never U to want a holiday.

True, but do you think you'd book one if you were in my shoes?

YANBU to WANT a holiday.

Picking a holiday over non urgent home improvements would be fine by me but not having absolutely no savings at all. I’d personally prioritise saving enough for money to cover a few months expenses first, then I’d save for a holiday. So no, in your shoes I wouldn’t book a holiday this year (sorry!) but I’d plan for next year once you had built up some savings.

Yes we spent our savings on doing our garden up - so have to build up the pot again...

Will get browsing summer 2020 hols!!

Incidentally, if anyone has any tips for nice but reasonably priced holidays in the sun, do feel free to share them! :)

YANBU - Get yourself on holiday.
My thinking:

1. Money pit houses always seem to need something doing 😜 and if you use that as an excuse then you’ll probably never get away. Plus how much additional quality of life will you get from small improvements? I found that once you do get to the bottom of the to do list, the first thing needs redone again 😡

1. You mention that you are both about to extend hours at work. Now is this best time to arrange a holiday. You may not fit one in once you become more busy and it would be more healthy to start a busier period following a refreshing family break.

1. You haven’t had a break since before DS was born - you probably need it. Also, imminent extended working hours will reduce (I assume) personal family time with DS. So, I think the memory of a good family break prior to that could work wonders.

As PP has said though, the lack of savings is a bit worrying and there could be an argument for concentrating on that first. I’m not talking about a vast investment portfolio, but just an emergency fund.
But notwithstanding that, I would get away as soon as practically possible.

As for recommendations, it’s all down to taste and what sorts of things you’re after. One thing I will say is that some of the most disappointing holidays we’ve had are the long planned and anticipated ones; some of the best have been last minute, not expecting much types (those were cheaper too!).

But if you’re determined for summer 2020, I must admit sometimes the planning and choosing is part of the fun.

But do get some kind of break - I’m sure it will be very beneficial to you all

OP ...sod it..go on holiday...if everything else can wait let it...you need to recharge and take a break and relax sometime...you need to look after you and your own well being too.....have a look on teletext holidays on the web ,,,love holidays ...travel republic and holiday hypermarket websites....there are week breaks all inclusive in spain for just over 250..each with flights included.....maybe if you had a break away you would feel better placed to be more positive about the money pit house!!! Go for it!

Ah it’s good to hear the little devils on my shoulder encouraging me to book the holiday!!

It’s a valid point that’s been made though - we both deserve a break and change of scenery - esp after a challenging few years as we’ve got to grips with family life (still working on that). Also, it’s a big birthday for DH towards the end of the year so we have a reason to celebrate...

Will keep doing sneaky online searches and get passports sorted in the meantime...

Yanbu. Your husband sounds miserable.

Would he be shitty about it if you booked something for his birthday?

Get rid of the debt first. CC debt does not stay at 0% forever.
No savings.
If anything major happens you have got no choice but to borrow again.

You own a house so there is a risk. You work and have a child to support so there is a risk. You may need a car for work.

Sorry but I see people in debt all the time and it is hellish to get out of.

You can take a break without spending money - just a few sunny days in the garden.

I would never take a holiday with no savings in place. Thankfully DH has a similarly frugal attitude.

He can be a bit of a misery, tbh. He acknowledges that he’s turned into a Victor Meldrew type prematurely. He has a degree of social anxiety, which I think contributes to this reluctance to go on holiday. He tends to fixate on the home because that’s where he’d happiest.

He’d be a bit thrown if I booked a holiday for his birthday...he’d probably worry about how we’d pay for it (I wouldn’t be able to cover the cost by myself).

Hm, maybe I should look at winter sun options, using his birthday as the reason...

Why are you both working PT? With ZERO savings and credit card debt, albeit manageable, how are you proposing to pay for a cheap holiday?

No, I wouldn't be going. Credit card debt, even on 0% finance still needs to be paid off! When we did house renovations and put various house stuff on a 0% credit card back in the day, we didn't go on holiday for a few years afterwards in order to pay it off first.

Start saving/wok FT/increase income and go next year. I agree with a PP, that the planning and research is half the fun. Budget flights are generally released in the autumn for next summer. You will get a bargain if you are able to buy them early on the day of release so start doing some research on where you might like to go.

No I wouldn't in those circumstances. Debt,no savings, a home that needed jobs, a child to support and both only working part time wouldn't even make me think of booking a holiday. It's a luxury that should be way way down the list.

Depends how much you earn and how much you would be willing to spend on a holiday

Yes, valid points too, Spider and Purple. I know I have responsibilities and the sensible thing would be to save until I’m debt free. But it doesn’t stop me hankering for this little break in the sun. I suppose more than anything, I need a change of scenery.

I would OP life really is too short.

As long as it doesn't put you further in debt.

We work PT to balance childcare between us but DH will be going FT and I will be working 4 days.

Luckily our monthly outgoings are manageable so part-time working has been fine, just not left us with much disposable income.

Our savings have been wiped not due to spending on luxuries as such, but due to house needing so much more work than we bargained for - ploughed tens of thousands into the house fixing a whole host of problems :(

I know a holiday is not a priority and obviously not considering luxury options, just wondering if there’s a way to make it work.

How old is ds? Just wondering how long you haven't had a week away for. I would be very tempted if your dc is not small and would get a lovely experience to remember. Not so much if they are toddler age.

I have no savings and go on (cheap) holidays. I just live very frugally when I'm on them and am careful. If I waited until I had savings I'd never go!

DS is 2.5. We’ve never taken him anywhere beyond his GP’s houses, which aren’t that far away.

I wouldn't go and I especially wouldn't book a holiday for someone on the pretence it was for their birthday.

How could it relax you when you have no savings?

Ok, I think what I will do is look at holidays for next summer. We should have built up some savings by then given that we will have extra income and reduced childcare costs. I don’t think I can wait until I’m completely debt free though...

I have read the thread again. Your swapping a week in, hopefully, the sun for a load more headaches.

We are in a similar position. We have a house that needs loads more spending on it if we could. We have already done a lot to it and it is fine for now. We have 2 young kids and really want a cheap holiday and we are trying to decide if we should go. I think we will do! Don't have a lot of savings and some debt from house things but overall we are not in a terrible position as put a good deposit on the house and it has increased in value quite a bit due to the work we have done.
We do feel like we shouldn't go on holiday but then life is too short!
We would prob do a cheap all inclusive to keep costs down as think it would work out cheaper than pay for meals and drinks out every day. And would be more relaxing to not have to think about going out or cooking.

I don't think YABU to want to go on holiday. But personally, I don't think I would enjoy it if I knew I had credit card debts (albeit manageable), and no savings. Summer 2020 would be much more appealing to me.