To wonder how many car accidents I have been in that I don't know about?

[PatoPotato]

I have just received a call that I have been in a car accident.

This seems to happen every other week. I'm not sure if I have temporary amnesia, but if this is true then I don't know how our family car comes out unscathed? These are genuinely concerned individuals on the phone obviously, so they would not lie to me.

Has this happened to you? Have you been in a car accident that you don't know about?

Yes and I love winding them us and say great, thanks for calling. Glad you can help etc

Why yes! Only this morning this charming young lady called to offer her sympathies and to talk about my 'next steps'.

You think your amnesia is bad?
Mine is so bad not only so I forget accidents, I also forget I even have a car
Or a driving licence

Me too and I don't even have a car

I don't get these as much as I used to, sadly, because I loved winding them up "oh my goodness! that sounds like it was an awful accident! thank you so much for letting me know! did my leg have to be amputated? REALLY? and my arms too? and here's me not even with a valid driving licence!!" They'd usually let me get about 20 seconds into it before hanging up on me

I think I once told a caller that I had indeed been in an accident, yes...they got a bit excited and asked if I had been injured and I told them I had been decaptitated. I kept that one going for a couple of minutes actually.

I thought it was just me leaving a trail of destruction in my wake.

I love these calls
"I'm calling about your accident within the last three months."
"OMG! An accident?! When??"
"Within the last three months, madam."
"What?! Who?"
"You, madam, within the last three months."
"OMG! Am I okay??"

My mum told them she had been decapitated too.

These are the only cold callers I get.

I asked one of them once if the accident that she was calling about was the one in which I died.

There was a silence for a bit and then she hung up.

Got the same reaction when I asked her why she keeps calling me - I'm pretty sure it's the same person, either that or all their staff sound the same.

If I tell her I haven't been in an accident she comes back with 'well someone in your household has been in an accident'; bloody dog, I've said not to take the car out without my permission.

The ones where it is a recording calling you - I speak profanities in a normal tone of voice which confuses it - goes on for a minute or so before I get cut off. Feels so liberating to say it all those words out loud!!!

My dad has fun winding them up. His favourite reply at the moment is "Yes I was in an accident and sadly I died".

I once got one while I was waiting at the side of the motorway immediately after being in an accident (only minor injuries thankfully but several cars majorly bashed up).

I said to them 'that was quick, how on earth did you know' which confused them a little. I did wonder if it was one of those 'your phone spys on you for the purposes of adverts' moments as I had just phoned DP to tell him about the accident.

I’ve been in LOTS of accidents I can’t remember. I’m going to make so much money in compensation from them! I can use some of it to buy new legs and maybe a head and pay for the many soon to be expired warranties on my vehicle the dealer people keep telling me about. It’s only 6 months old so I’m a bit puzzled because I kinda expected the warranties to last a bit longer than that tbh. And I might buy a new computer too because, according to the nice people at Microsoft who keep calling, mine, which I don’t remember buying and can’t even find (luckily I have a Mac I’ve been able to use) has viruses on it.

I got loads, particularly the year when I had been in a car accident and trying to sort out the insurance was a nightmare because they couldn't ring us because we assumed they were scammers...

My dad has a very dry sense of humour and is spending his retirement trying to beat his record of how long he can keep someone on the phone trying to fix his computer virus. Anyone done better than 32 minutes?

"Oh that accident..."
"yes, what happened?"
"I hit my head, and blacked out"
"When was this"
"I don't know I've forgotten..." (repeat as answer for every question)

I honestly wish I could have been in the room, when they brainstormed that this was a brilliant cold calling idea.

Them: we're calling about the accident you were in...
Me: oh, god, I'm SO glad you called, the body is still in the boot of my car and it's getting a bit smelly now
Them: let me transfer you to my manager.....

I had to hang up, I was laughing so hard that wee came out

I always respond with yes, I was very drunk at the time so I can hardly remember it, the other parties injuries were terrible too, do they want the police case number . . . . .

Last time one of these companies phoned me, they got a lengthy description of the time I borrowed a car after I had been out drinking, which resulted in being rammed off the road by a couple of cars with flashing blue lights.

Jack I think I love your dad 32 minutes is impressive.

I had one that had me mildly amused. Usually I avoid calls but this one told me I'd been in a car accident I said no and before I could disconnect they then asked me if I had had an accident at work. Voice was pre-recorded so assume if I'd stayed on the line they'd ask me about PPI!

Always please to read other peoples answers as get ideas of what to say.

Had a long conversation about the shocking injuries to my fingers when a fingernail got broken and ruined my manicure - got sworn at for that one. I find saying ‘you sound nice, forget the insurance claim and tell me about yourself’ annoys them a lot too. I can do a good line in wittering about have they any pets, what’s their favourite colour, etc. They don’t last long before hanging up.

@Omzlas I may have to borrow that one 😂😂😂

My ex used to ask them if they'd claimed their outstanding PPI 😂