to think I can't be the only one who worries about my child dying?

[lampshine]

I was told it'd get easier as my child got older, but he's 7 months now and I still stare at him at night because I think he's going I die.

I had a traumatic pregnancy and we thought something was wrong with him but he's fine.

I had a traumatic birth, he was pretty poorly to start off with as he was only 4lbs11 (at 38 weeks).

When he was about 3 months he was admitted to hospital as he stopped breathing a few times for very short periods. Enough to turn him purple. Nothing wrong with him, just a blip!

I now as a result, do not sleep. Tell me it'll pass? I'm exhausted.

I honestly think it’s a normal part of motherhood to some extent, but it’s also a symptom of trauma and I suspect for you (as was the case for me) it may be more intense than for some others.

Have you heard of EMDR? It’s a type of treatment for PTSD with excellent results. I’ve just recently signed up to an online service which has a monthly subscription and you can access it any time you like. While I’m sure 1-1 treatment would be better I thought I would try. It seems to be helping.

This week one of the kids with the same condition and same age as DT2 in a support group has died. It has absolutely terrified me, even though DT2 doesn’t have the same related conditions this child had. So while it can be anxiety, it can also be a reaction to the experiences you’ve had and legitimate concerns. If you’ve been in a situation where your child might die, you are of course going to worry more. I can say the intense fear lessened but I still worry.

It's definitely part of being a mother, but you'll have to try to overcome it with time, as you don't want your anxiety to rub off on your child as they get older. I can allow myself to worry over every little thing that could possibly happen to my child but I actively disallow myself to do that. I want them to grow up happy and relaxed and confident.

Also, I'm not prepared to ruin the happy times by worrying about bad things. We are only here for a short time and I want to enjoy every minute!

I feel like this too DS is 19 months and spent his first birthday coming off a ventilator in the PICU he's been in and out of hospital for respiratory problems ever since. We don't know what causes it. I can't sleep until he comes in with us sometimes it's 2 in the morning before he does. I have 2 older dds so I can't go to bed with him and let him sleep in my bed all night. I'm. Hoping the feeling passes I honestly worry that something will happen to him because I have let myself go to sleep and not heard his breathing change.