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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wedding dresses

48 replies

OnlyaMan · 09/06/2019 20:22

My lovely wife and I have been married for several years. We are both middle-aged, and our parents have passed away. Before we got married, we went (just the two of us) to a shop that sold second hand wedding dresses, because we both had the sense to have an inexpensive wedding.
We chose a very nice wedding dress, but it took a long time. when I took the dress to the counter, I said to the cashier "Here it is! It only took two hours to decide!"
She replied "Oh-not long then!"
Is this normal?

OP posts:
IceCreamSoda99 · 09/06/2019 20:26

Do you mean is it normal to decide in 2 hours? I don't think there is a "normal" amount of time. I imagine some people take days if not weeks trying on various dresses, returning to the ones they like to try again before making a choice, while others know exactly what they want. I knew what I wanted it to look like and found it on ebay and ordered it unseen.

Original poster
OnlyaMan · 09/06/2019 20:29

I posted this as a sort of "tease". I did not expect to be agreed with. I just wanted to hear whether the "average woman" thought it OK to take hours to chose an item of clothing.

OP posts:
Merryoldgoat · 09/06/2019 20:32

I saw the dress I wanted online, went to a shop that had it, tried it on, ordered it.

I don’t understand the ‘tease’?

WorraLiberty · 09/06/2019 20:32

Do you refer to each other as 'Nutty' by any chance?

lorribella · 09/06/2019 20:34

It would take me hours and at least 2 visits before deciding

BogglesGoggles · 09/06/2019 20:35

Well it’s not just an item of clothing though is it? They tend to be very expensive and have a high sentimental value. I loathe shopping and weddings so I just wore some clothes that I already had when I married but if I had to buy a wedding dress I imagine it would take me able 4 hours (including looking online, trying on etc).

IceCreamSoda99 · 09/06/2019 20:35

I've just realised you're a man, is this a goady post about women? Hmm I thought at first you were a lesbian couple.

Original poster
OnlyaMan · 09/06/2019 20:39

The post may be "goady", but it is well intentioned and light-hearted. Sorry for any offence.

OP posts:
Ohyesiam · 09/06/2019 20:42

So this all happened several years ago?

Cryalot2 · 09/06/2019 20:43

I tried one 2 dresses and bought the second .
Sort of wish many years on that I had tried on loads . But I was on a tight budget .
If I am buying something I will know straight away if I want it .

Jemima232 · 09/06/2019 20:44

But what's light-hearted about it?

What's the point at all?

So the pair of you took two hours to choose an inexpensive wedding gown. And?

icanhearapindrop · 09/06/2019 20:45

WorraLiberty 😂

Seeingadistance · 09/06/2019 20:47

So, several years ago you went shopping with someone and they took a couple of hours to choose what to buy.

And you’ve decide to share this with us.

Ok.

Sparklesocks · 09/06/2019 20:48

Sorry I’m confused what you’re looking for with this? Haha women take ages to pick clothes?

CherryPavlova · 09/06/2019 20:48

My daughter took two and a half hours. Only visited one shop. She had to cancel four other appointments.

boredboredboredboredbored · 09/06/2019 20:50

Bizarre post

Original poster
OnlyaMan · 09/06/2019 20:51

Jemima232
I suppose the point was that I hoped to read some amusing agreements or disagreements. This has not worked. OK-I am sorry. Goodbye.

OP posts:
Doobigetta · 09/06/2019 20:52

So when we furnish you with our anecdotes about either being silly empty headed women who spend too much time and effort thinking about dresses, or good, sensible women who agree with you, what will you be doing with that information? Presumably there is some woman in your life who is currently doing it wrong, in your terribly important opinion?

AphidEater · 09/06/2019 20:53

Why would you even still be thinking of this years later...?

LagunaBubbles · 09/06/2019 20:54

Whst do you mean "tease", dont get your point?

Rachie1973 · 09/06/2019 20:54

I’m surprised you were with her really.

IceCreamSoda99 · 09/06/2019 20:55

I don't have any data to back this up but if you are genuinely interested in opinions, I would say a mean time taken of all brides to be last year on choosing a dress is probably over two hours. There is a huge amount of cultural pressure and social conditioning built into choosing a wedding dress, it is advertised as the most important item of clothing a woman will ever wear, it therefore make sense that is is a decision that may take some people a long time to make. P.s. I don't take offence but I personally don't like the phrase "tease" it sounds patronising IMO, perhaps you can start a thread on whether the "average woman" likes to be "teased" Wink.

Queenoftheashes · 09/06/2019 20:56

Lol burn

Gardai · 09/06/2019 20:58

I think you’ve too much time on your hands OP

WhiteDust · 09/06/2019 20:59

OP!
I get it! Many people spend hours pouring over wedding dress magazines and shortlist dresses before going into several shops to try in a load of dresses.
The assistant was teasing you because compared to many, 2 hrs is good going!
I'm a 'I'll have that one' person - two hours and I'd be tearing my hair out!
Have a great wedding!