Is this weird? Not sure if IABU to find it weird or not!

[ContessaIsOnADietDammit]

It's was a very minor event but left me

A long-time friend (A; 8yo) of DS1 and DS2 was booked to come over to play/sleep over - we have developed this reciprocal thing with the parents over the past 6mo or so. I get on well with the parents - hanging out at their house chatting during playdates sort of thing. We've known them for nearly 10 years.

So the doorbell rang and I went to answer. A was there, plus a woman I didn't know. She introduced herself politely and handed over the friend's clothes/sleepover stuff, then said she or one of the parents would collect tomorrow at the prearranged time (slightly earlier than usual as my family have a prior engagement). She then headed off.

I was a bit bemused, tbh; if A's mum had texted to say 'Just sending the boy over with 'named friend' now; thanks, see you tomorrow!' then it wouldn't have felt weird at all. But she didn't, and it did/does. We had another couple of friends here at the time (they had randomly dropped in plus toddler) and they seemed to find it odd too. I can't quite articulate why though!

Please either explain it to me or tell me to give my head a wobble I repeat, this is not a life-changing incident. Just.... odd.

I don't think it's that odd really.

The person was probably passing and offered to do the drop-off.

That’s not odd!

Odd if a random person arrives to collect. Not to drop off.

Me nd my best friend drop eachother kids off places all the time. If hers are round here, then going somewhere else. I would drop them at the somewhere else.

I would probably say 'oh I am x mums friend. X has been with me this morning so I said I would drop them off.'

But I can guess how you wouldnt think to point out who you were if you were in a rush or thinking about the next 6 things you are doing today

Were you expecting the mum to stay for the evening?

Not odd, child dropped off as arranged just by a different person.

Not odd at all. Wouldn't have thought anything of it.

It’s not weird that she dropped him off but is a little odd that you weren’t messaged by the parents or that she didn’t explain who she was and how she came to be dropping the kid off. Have you asked the child who it was?

She introduced herself politely

So who was she?

I try and send my son to drop of dd when they have chatty parents. I hate chit chat and being invited in for coffee etc. I wouldn’t think to text ahead to say it was Ds getting our the car instead of me. It was the child you’d invited not the parent, no?

I still don't think that's odd Vodka.

It's just a drop off.

I'd agree if a stranger came to collect though.

I think, based on previous gossip conversations I've had with his parents, that the lady who dropped him off must be visiting - I recognised her name as a friend of theirs going through a rough time.

A's parents will routinely come in/have a cup of tea/stay for over an hour when dropping off/collecting, so staying for the evening would be only a bit of a stretch

I think I would find it odd OP, bus as you say not life changing.

A mutual friend has just immediately agreed it's weird, so I am not alone here

I don’t think it’s odd in the slightest

It seems perfectly normal to me.

So if a child of people that you're friends with is dropped off by a random with no warning, you'd all find it totally normal?

Ok then clearly I am the odd one!

I don't really understand what's weird but might be missing something. A boy got dropped off for your DC's party by a family friend? That seems like a fairly normal occurrence to me, I'm not sure I'd think anything of it!

I would probably have messaged you in advance to let you know but then I'm a bit uptight

Maybe the friend was on her way home/to the shop/to pick someone, and friend's mum was dealing with a sibling who is sick/got themselves dirty/had a crisis and friend of mum offered to drop the child. Nothing weird about it at all and I'm sure I've done it as the mum or the friend before.

Not odd at all. I've had 6 year old kids turn up on their own before (in fairness their parent couldn't park so the kid had jumped out and parent had waited to make sure they got into the house before driving off). Kid dropped off my friend/aunt/grandparent/neighbour wouldn't strike me as odd at all unless you had pre arranged for the parents to stay for dinner or something.

The mother probably meant to message you, but is obviously busy/distracted as she sent the child with her friend/relative. Not that odd.

How is it odd?

She did the drop off to introduce herself and so you'd met her and knew her if she does the pick up.

Seems like sensible planning, surely?

So if a child of people that you're friends with is dropped off by a random with no warning, you'd all find it totally normal?

I don't really get why you'd find it odd. The random was obviously known to the other family and for whatever reason it was more convenient for them to drop the kid off - it's not like they had any need to come into your home so there was no real need for it to be explained to you. I'd find it more strange if it was the first time the kids had been to your house - in that situation I'd want to meet the host parents before leaving my kid there.

Why is it odd?