Things other people do that you just don't 'get'

[DebbieFiderer]

Mine are -

Starting to drive off, then putting your seat belt on whilst trying to control the car at the same time. Why? It can't save more than a second, looks awkward, and is dangerous!

Putting bananas into a little plastic bag before putting them in the trolley - the only reason I can see for the plastic bags is to keep loose veg together, or to keep edible parts clean, neither of which applies to bananas, so what's the point?

Taking shopping trollies back to the trolley park but not actually connecting them up with the ones already there - you've done about 95% of the effort, is it really that hard to make someone else's life a bit easier by putting it away properly?

( Yes, mine do seem to be mostly supermarket related but I suppose that's where I come across other people most of the time!)

Actually, I do have one non-supermarket one - people only using one half of a set of double doors when there is a queue of people all wanting to go through - they all line up patiently to go through the one door rather than just OPENING THE OTHER ONE!!

Grown adults acting like teenagers on social media, such as tagging themselves in A&E, cryptic posts so people ask how they

Oh my god this 😂 also when grown adult couples write posts to each other on social media telling each other how much they love each other. Can’t you just text? Or say in person?

People who spend thousands of pounds on a wedding when they earn a basic salary.

I know a couple who earn £40k per year between them who spend £15k on a wedding! So after tax they spend almost HALF their yearly earnings on a DAY. I understand if you’re rich but to spend half your yearly pay on what is basically a party is ridiculous imo.

"people who plan their weddings more than a year in advance." I used to work in the industry many venues are booked 2-3 years in advance especially for more popular dates/seasons. Also if brides and bridesmaids dresses are being made bespoke it's usually a minimum 6 month lead time because they're big, complicated dresses to make plus there's the shipping time as most are made/come from the Far East and it's cheaper to send shipped than by air. It is of course possible to have a really beautiful small economic wedding but if people choose to have a bigger, more traditional affair it does take time to organise. It's co-ordinating everything too, so finding a date that the venue, and if not included, accommodation, transport, caterers, entertainment etc are all available, this is what also leads to dates booked far in advance.

And I do agree @namechange1990x that spending more than they can reasonably afford on a wedding is ridiculous!

"People who start thinking about Christmas more than 6 months in advance." Dds birthday is a few weeks after Christmas, her gran (my ex mil) is the week before, most of the time since dd was born I've been on a very tight budget so planning throughout the year for Christmas (a combination of saving, picking up non-perishable items that are useful, building up loyalty points etc) was essential. Many people are really struggling financially at the moment so being organised makes it less expensive and less stressful.

"Going to do a weekly shop without a list." My mother - in her 70's and normally very organised type - does this and every single time forgets something crucial and then moans about it! She also wanders bizarrely not going along each aisle in turn but goes in order of how she'll use the items/ingredients!  so breakfast cereals, then milk, then bread, then tea, then lunch items then tea items...and in between when she "can't think" what she needs next she goes right back to the entrance - utterly bonkers! It also means she succumbs to all the "special promotions" nonsense because even for a "quick" top up shop she covers the whole floor plan!

"It's called jigsaw identification." Yea I've raised this with a couple of people - they also tend to be (I wonder if you've noticed this too @Manumanadoodoodadoo ) the ones with the worst privacy settings too.

@iwantdoesntget - paedophilia isn't the main concern, it can lead to fraud (think about standard security questions), identity theft, parental abduction, harassment...

"Also-why do people have to post their holiday photos on fbook whilst they are actually away" and another security issue - yea just tell literally the whole world your homes empty!

@Iwantdoesntget

I was referring to:

"People that walk slow, or have no spacial awareness when out and about drive me nuts"

"People who dawdle driving and walking with no concept of impact on others."

The walkers (twice in one post too) might be disabled, have a chronic pain condition or just plain be knackered! The drivers might be driving somewhere unfamiliar, be nervous new drivers or be feeling unwell and preparing to pull over, plus I'd be interested in your definition of "dawdling" anyway. Excessively slow driving I agree is a concern but I get the feeling it's more you're impatient and it's people driving perfectly normally and safely but not zipping about as you'd prefer that you're thinking of.

"People who say they haven’t had time to shower as they just had a baby etc" not everyone recovers as well or quickly after childbirth as others, if they've had a section or a traumatic vaginal birth they may be in pain and have difficulty moving or moving is painful which is demotivating, they might be struggling with pnd or simply not have the experience of looking after such a young baby and be nervous. Posts like that making out its easy for all new mum's to "be organised" are hugely unsupportive and inconsiderate to those struggling.

"You sound like you have no concept of the gravity of a poor childhood" that assumption was a HUGE mistake!

"I’m very jealous your statement insinuates your life to have been so sheltered" quite the opposite actually. I had a shite childhood (and you can AS to confirm if you wish, other posters familiar with my story will likely remember too) toxic family (mum's scapegoat) including violent abusive (in EVERY way) father, sod all money or privilege. Left home in late teens to live in a bedsit working a very low paid job for own safety and mh but never truly worked past it all yet. Definitely NOT sheltered 🙄

I happened to agree with your last 2 paragraphs of that post (I'm also veggie and totally get the type you're talking about and yes it's bonkers to be anything less than upper mc and vote Tory!)

I don't get why I'm supposed to be in our local Court today for a claim that was heard in another district Court 4 years ago when it's not a re-hearing or objection.

I'm not going but sent into the relevant Govt Department a copy of the original Order with a brief reason (written with help from my insurer's legal team) as to why it should be cancelled.

@Graphista

The dawdlers and slow walkers I refer to are not disabled. They are ‘day’ people, rich Surrey mums and grandmothers who don’t work and have limited concept of people that do. Blocking door ways chatting. I’m so time poor as a single parent it drives me potty. My children’s school doesn’t provide after school care on the basis the majority make up of parents is working fathers plus stay at home mums.

Comment about new mums that don’t shower is not about anyone that has any signs of PND, of course I may have missed it, but they attend baby groups, get their nails and hair done, lunches, coffees but moan about not having enough time to shower, it’s symptomatic of new baby bollox not PND.

Not unempathictic in the slightest, these examples are realistically annoying to anyone, should you be witness personally I’m certain.

@fairweathercyclist - I have sympathy with this view of yours "Just thought of another one as a recent poster brought it up. Getting all virtuous about plastic while driving a gas guzzling car." I do know someone who has v strong views re plastic & makes them widely known - which is fine - obviously - but the tiniest hint she & her DP could have a smaller car - "well we can't for reason a reason b etc " -

"The dawdlers and slow walkers I refer to are not disabled" you CANNOT possibly know that! There are thousands of invisible disabilities and conditions that mean people prefer/are only able to walk slowly. Nobody looking at me or dd would know we are disabled, yet we both are, dd tends to having a long stride as a result of hers but some days she has to rein in, if I were to try walking faster than a "dawdle" especially on uneven ground I could easily do myself a serious mischief. Dd is 18 and looks slim, fit and healthy when actually she is in pain most days and some days can barely move, I'm late 40's and greying now but I've been disabled since early 30's and again I appeared slim, fit and with apparently no reason I couldn't be moving faster than the glacial pace that was necessary for my safety. I have particular trouble negotiating steps and steep kerbs and slopes.

Wealth doesn't mean they're not disabled either - I'm about as proletariat as they come yet you seem to have a real issue with people wealthier than you.

Again re the new mums, being able to A doesn't necessarily mean someone is able to do Z for any number of reasons.

Personally thanks to a relatively good recovery from section once I left hospital (it was a very bad delivery both dd and I almost died due to rare complications) and a quite easy going baby plus I had the experience and confidence with babies due to having been a nanny before having dd I was able to quite quickly sort a good routine for us and I was able to do what was needed fairly quickly (although I wasn't initially allowed to shower unless another adult was present due to ongoing medical/safety risks) but I can certainly understand and have supported new mums with far less, sometimes no experience, with young babies as they made the adjustment and built confidence.

@Namechanger I’m so sorry that you’ve experienced/are experiencing that. I did too, twice. I am extremely lucky that fertility treatment exists and I have my two DC but no amount of relaxing or holidays would have got them for me, I needed the meds.

And as for planning Christmas 6 months in advance. Both of my DC’s birthdays are within 6 days of Christmas. My dad, sister and MIL are all within three weeks. Plus Christmas isn’t ‘just a day’ to us. We celebrate for a week or two with various activities, days out etc so we do start planning six months early (bought my first Christmas present last week, actually )

Doidoit19

Absolutely. Christmas lasts a month in my house!

@speakout I don’t get the whole one day thing. We love the build up. The Christmas markets, visits to Father Christmas, going to look at the lights etc. It’s an event to us.

I don’t get the whole one day thing. We love the build up.

well, so do I, but I don't need to think about Christmas for 6 months!
Gift shopping is done in November over a weekend or 2, mainly online, wrapped and hidden over 2 or 3 evenings. Food ordered the same. Tree bought last day of November, and put on the 1st of December (or as close as), and done.

December left to enjoy, but no need to start "planning" for half a year. I might have booked a few things in advance, but how many pantos and Christmas show and events do you realistically go to? No more than 2 or 3, haven't got time for more.

If I started to buy presents in June, they would have duplicate or no longer be wanted by December!

People who push both the up and down buttons outside a lift, then look surprised if it's not going the way they want. Get this all the time at work - go from basement to 7th floor, usually get stopped at ground floor, fair enough. Often get stopped on next floor up by someone wanting to go down. The arrow points up. The voice says "lift going up". They then get in and exclaim "oh it's going up", maybe even pausing to glare at those who happened to be in it first!!

When booking leave at Christmas, i prefer the week leading up to it. After Boxing Day it always feels a bit of a let-down.

I used to work in the industry many venues are booked 2-3 years in advance especially for more popular dates/seasons.

I got married in August, with around 150 guests, there were plenty of venues available a year in advance. Indeed, a dress take around 6 months, but again, not 2 to 3 years! That's my point - you need to prepare early if you want to have a choice, but 1 year is plenty - what let down if you waste 2 or 3 years of your life about a one day event that will disappear in the blink of an eye. I love big wedding, but I am sure even the royals didn't need to plan every little details for years.

CherryPavlova said "Picking up dog pooh in a little plastic bag rather than flick it into undergrowth "

Stick and flick is gross - much better to pick it up and take it home.

To be fair, I didn't really understand how lift buttons worked until a couple of years ago. To me it made sense if I was on the 5th floor and wanted to go to ground, but I can see the lift is on the 2nd floor, to press the up button... to bring the lift up to me. But really of course you should press the down button, to communicate "I want to go down". So that if the lift needs to pick up somebody on the 7th floor first, it doesn't need to stop on the 5th on the way up, but will stop there on the way down instead. This makes even more sense if there are several lifts.

I am fairly intelligent I had just only ever thought about lifts from the perspective of a single user and not really considered the fact that sometimes they have to address multiple requests at once. And I have never, ever seen a lift with an explanation of what the buttons do, because it seems to be assumed that everybody knows. I have even been known to press both because it didn't really make sense to me why there would be two anyway.

I just assumed the "Going up/down" announcement was to avoid disorientation, since you can't always tell which way you are travelling.

Why do dogs have such toxic poo that it's dangerous to leave their poo in the wild when surely non-domesticated animals shit in the open constantly?

I'm not a dog owner so I don't know, but surely all animal poo is potentially riddled with parasites and diseases etc? It strikes me that poo under a hedge is just going to break down and go into the earth whereas poo in a plastic bag in a bin is just contributing to non-biodegradeable plastic use, no?

Getting a shower in the morning, especially if you don't have another in the evening.Seems wrong to be clean to go to outside ?

@MorondelaFrontera

As I’ve previously said, I have 5 birthdays in December, two of which are my DC’s. Things get booked up pretty quickly where I am so we have to book certain things in summer. A lot of the smaller businesses that I buy from close their order books earlier so I can’t leave it until November. And I keep lists, no chance of duplication of gifts here.

Letting their pets access all rooms of their homes.
Shitty, wormy cats' arses perched on kitchen worktops.
Dogs in their owner's bed - covering them in stinky hair and foul dog breath.
I feel like vomitting just thinking about it.
Animals should live outside.

And as for planning Christmas 6 months in advance. Both of my DC’s birthdays are within 6 days of Christmas. My dad, sister and MIL are all within three weeks. Plus Christmas isn’t ‘just a day’ to us. We celebrate for a week or two with various activities, days out etc so we do start planning six months early (bought my first Christmas present last week, actually

I totally see why this might mean you need to start saving money for Christmas earlier in the year, but I don't really understand why it necessitates doing anything six months earlier.

People raising money for charity by climbing up a mountain or running a marathon or otherwise doing something that they want to do and expecting you to pay towards it. My dh knew someone expecting people to fund his skiing holiday because it was for charity.

The dawdlers and slow walkers I refer to are not disabled

I agree, they dawdle along looking at their phones. They do not have disabilities, unless addiction to one's mobile phone is now regarded as one.