...to expect my family to just eat normal food?

[ILoveJoeBrown]

Getting so demoralised and fed up with my family. DH, DSs aged 21,20 and 16 just will not eat anything I'd consider 'normal' food and seem to want to exist on supernoodles and chocolate spread, or junk food from take aways.

I used to cook proper dinners - spag bols; ham and baked potatoes; sausages and mash, but over the last couple of years they just won't eat anything I suggest. DH is just as bad and insists on not eating until at least 9pm, by which time we are all starving.

I have resorted to using a 'recipe delivery' service once a month so at least I can have a more adventurous menu for a couple of days.

What do I do? Let them exist like this or try another approach? i never dreamed they would all turn out to be junk food addicts and storing up unhealthy lives for themselves.

AIBU?

At their ages, I fail to see how you can do anything about this, honestly. Sadly, they will probably have to suffer the consequences when they get older.

I would make them fend for themselves and cook myself a lovely dinner at a time that suits me. What more can you do?

Of course yanbu feed yourself let them crack on eating crap .

Is it an option to just let them cook their picky selective crap for themselves and enjoy lovely dinners that you like yourself? Given that they are all old enough to be so fussy and cook for themselves?

Not trying to sound arsey but really, you're not their chef?!

Don't cook for them. 🤷

Plus, bollocks to not eating dinner till 9pm!
You have really been handed a golden ticket to have whatever you like for dinners - don't look that gift horse in the mouth!

I would just leave them to it tbh! Get yourself dinners that you want and eat them when you want! Why do you wait til 9pm with them?
They’re all old enough to get on with it so let them

Totally agree. Eat what you want, when you want (your dh doesn't get to set the time wtf ?!)

Cook what you like, when you like. If you feel generous, offer to make some for the rest of them, but you don't have to.

I ate crap as a teen but then i had to cook for myself from age 11. Save the fancy food boxes for yourself. Your sons and DH are all old enough to stick chips and pizza in the oven while you enjoy something else.

My son put himself on a special diet at 13 and cooked it himself. He did not expect me to cook separate meals just for him. If’d cook yourself your own dinner and leave them to it.

Well for a start the 21 & 20yr old can move out OP

Yes. Don't facilitate their pot noodle crap. Don't buy it in. But make yourself something delicious and eat it at a suitable time. - - Whilst freezing extra portions that are enticing as they cool on the side waiting for the freezer.--

but over the last couple of years they just won't eat anything I suggest

Is that because you say 'who fancies lasagne tonight?' and they say no? Mine are younger, but I don't make suggestions, I just cook what I want and they eat it! I do have a very fussy family so I am restricted, but as a general rule, the cook (i.e. me) chooses.

Eh? Tell your H if he's not going to eat at s civilised time he can cook for himself! And tell your sons that they need to specify in advance if they're going to want dinner - if they say yes they eat what they're given, if they say no then no cooking for them, they can fend for themselves. And don't buy any shit food like super noodles!

I'd say 'dinner will be ready at 6' and put any leftovers in the freezer. Let them fend for themselves.

If they used to eat normally, what/how did it change? Who pays for the takeaways? Who buys the super noodles and chocolate spread?

My teens eat proper home cooked meals 5 out of 7 nights. Pizza /take away the 2. Can they be persuaded to do similar?

I'm glad that MNers feel as frustrated with me, as i do with myself. Maybe I need to chill out a bit and like you suggest, just cook for myself. I've bought the food - they are actually perfectly capable of cooking it.

DS20 often buys his own food so I don't stress as much about him.

I do care about what DH eats - he is overweight and getting more so as he will insist on having huge portions of everything and snacks on cake/biscuits before announcing he's hungry and what have I planned for dinner!! When I point this out [getting angrier every time I do], he just huffs and carries on anyway.

Frankly the older two can cook for themselves, they are adults, as is your husband. Why won't he eat earlier? Why don't you have a dinner rota where everyone takes turn to properly cook? Five of you, everyone has one night a week they are responsible for - and they have to make more of an effort than pouring hot water on a pot noodle

I think eating crap can affect your mood - making you more likely to be grumpy and lethargic. So I would make them nice food some nights. But why aren't they hungry, at that age they should be eating tons.
Do they play sport? If not try turning off the wifi at mealtimes to get them to sit and eat.

Cook dinner for when you want it. Plate it up. Uneaten dinners can be put in the freezer the following morning and save you cooking another day.
At their ages, it's their problem.

How to sort the child feeding problem:)

Https:www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/food/mum-puts-kids-dinners-straight-in-the-bin-to-save-time-20190509185423

I would tell your husband very clearly that if he has no interest or motivation to improve his health, you certainly won't be wasting your time trying to force him to give a fuck. He knows where the kitchen is, therefore, from now on, he is responsible for making any of the rubbish he chooses to eat.

Whoops wrong link!

www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/food/mum-puts-kids-dinners-straight-in-the-bin-to-save-time-20190509185423

cook for yourself, at 20 and 21 they should be considering moving out anyway

The kids are just behaving their age. Your DH sounds like he's being a bit of a knob though. Why does he want to eat at 9? And eating crap as a teen is one thing, he should presumably know better how to look after himself, and to respect the person cooking.

I'd sort out your routine with him, and for at least a few nights a week just leave them to it. Your older two should be cooking for you sometimes too, especially if they're living rent free.