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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

FGM on year 5 school curriculum

571 replies

MermaidMummy · 07/06/2019 10:27

I'm really not sure if I'm being unreasonable, so I'm interested in everyone's thoughts.
My 9-year-old's class has just started learning about puberty. We have been told that the next lesson will cover terminology such as erection, sperm and female genital mutilation.
I just don't get why they need to learn about FGM at 9 years old. Some of these kids are very "young" for their age, and mine is very sensitive (won't watch the news in case an "adult topic" crops up).
What is the rationale for teaching this in year 5? There is nobody in the class from a cultural background likely to carry out FGM, but even if there was, would a 9 year-old know that it might happen to them and inform a teacher (if that is the rationale for teaching it)? From what I have read they aren't told anything about it in advance. If it has already happened to them, what is the benefit of bringing it up in class? Couldn't it be damaging and stigmatising?

OP posts:
BertrandRussell · 07/06/2019 14:48

“Do kids need to know about beheadings at age 9? Do they need to know about waterboarding or other forms of torture?”
Probably not. But none of those things are likely to happen to them or anyone in their peer group in the immediate future.

Fibbke · 07/06/2019 14:49

Yes we can learn about it. At secondary school.

Stop putting the onus on girls to eradicate this! Prosecute the parents. It's disgusting to suggest that fgm would die out if only girls were taught that it's wrong.

And teaching 8 year olds about something that is incredibly distressing, unlikely to ever affect them amd that they are powerless to do anything about is totally wrong.

Porosha · 07/06/2019 14:49

drug abuse etc

We learned that in Year 6.

pikapikachu · 07/06/2019 14:49

Do kids need to know about beheadings at age 9? Thr average 9 year old has seen Horrible Histories and will know that it was used by kings like Henry VIII.

BertrandRussell · 07/06/2019 14:50

“Do they learn about gang culture, knife crime, drug abuse etc?”

Yes.

Fibbke · 07/06/2019 14:50

But none of those things are likely to happen to them or anyone in their peer group in the immediate future actually teens running away to join islamic state is very much likely to happen

BertrandRussell · 07/06/2019 14:51

“Stop putting the onus on girls to eradicate this! Prosecute the parents. It's disgusting to suggest that fgm would die out if only girls were taught that it's wrong.”
Nobody is. But educating girls is part of what will eradicate it.

Original poster
MermaidMummy · 07/06/2019 14:52

And do you think you should have learnt it in year 5?

As I have stated up thread, Porosha, my daughter won't watch the news. Refuses to. Leaves the room if it's on.

OP posts:
Porosha · 07/06/2019 14:52

The average 9 year old has seen Horrible Histories and will know that it was used by kings like Henry VIII.

Exactly. We used to play a game at break time where someone was the Evil Queen and they would lock people in the dungeons and starve them, or behead them. I don't get how some kids aren't aware of these things.

Original poster
MermaidMummy · 07/06/2019 14:53

BertrandRussell

“Do they learn about gang culture, knife crime, drug abuse etc?”

Yes.

In year 5?

OP posts:
tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 07/06/2019 14:53

Isabella agree we need more prosecutions. Educating children about the matter and helping them recognise the signs that it could be happening to someone they know could be the first very small step that will lead to a prosecution.

Christ, so much compassion on this thread.

Porosha · 07/06/2019 14:54

And do you think you should have learnt it in year 5?

Sure, I don't see why not. It was just the names of some illegal substances and "why they are bad" etc. Smoking and alcohol was included. No big deal.

Fibbke · 07/06/2019 14:54

Educating children about the matter and helping them recognise the signs that it could be happening to someone they know could be the first very small step that will lead to a prosecution

This is a lovely idea but I don't believe it ever happens like that.

Original poster
MermaidMummy · 07/06/2019 14:55

The average 9 year old has seen Horrible Histories and will know that it was used by kings like Henry VIII.

Exactly. We used to play a game at break time where someone was the Evil Queen and they would lock people in the dungeons and starve them, or behead them. I don't get how some kids aren't aware of these things.

Yes, but the clue is in the word histories. It's not current and not something they would be afraid of happenung to them. FGM is very current and COULD happen, and IS something they will worry about.

OP posts:
IsabellaLinton · 07/06/2019 14:59

And teaching 8 year olds about something that is incredibly distressing, unlikely to ever affect them amd that they are powerless to do anything about is totally wrong

Absolutely agree. Why could this problem not be approached in other ways on a community level, aimed at the adults in question, potential perpetrators, not the potential victims?

Fibbke · 07/06/2019 14:59

Because people are too frightened to confront adults about it.

Theghosttrain · 07/06/2019 15:00

Stop putting the onus on girls to eradicate this! Prosecute the parents. It's disgusting to suggest that fgm would die out if only girls were taught that it's wrong.

Children who dont know it's wrong wont speak out and tell someone it has happened/is going to happen to them. That is why education is key. In order to prosecute the parents, there has to be evidence of a crime. If children arent taught FGM is wrong, the parents who mutilate their children in this way will continue to escape prosecution.

Oh and the educated children of today are tomorrow's parents. They can help break this cycle.

Fibbke · 07/06/2019 15:01

So they expunge their conscience by talking to 8 year olds about it and feel the job is done.

Original poster
MermaidMummy · 07/06/2019 15:01

Can you imagine being taught about beheadings in the Middle East for crimes such as being gay, blasphemy and adultry...Would you expect kuds to go and role play it at break time Porosha?

OP posts:
SnowyAlpsandPeaks · 07/06/2019 15:01

Ds14 learnt about it when he was 8/9 by accident, it came on the news one evening so he asked what it meant. So we sat down with the Internet and explained, and showed him pictures (not photos- drawn pictures). He was 😮at it, obviously asking ‘but why?’, and we probably sat for about an hour discussing it. It did not harm or terrify him in any way, but he certainly had a lot of empathy for the children who went through it.

BertrandRussell · 07/06/2019 15:03

“Why could this problem not be approached in other ways on a community level, aimed at the adults in question, potential perpetrators,”
It is. Frankly, I find the idea of someone who is very open about their dd’s school being overwhelmingly BAME objecting to children being taught about this utterly shocking.

Original poster
MermaidMummy · 07/06/2019 15:03

Is this subject actually being taught in other schools in year 5, or just ours?

OP posts:
Theghosttrain · 07/06/2019 15:03

Why could this problem not be approached in other ways on a community level, aimed at the adults in question, potential perpetrators, not the potential victims?

Because you can reach every child and educate a whole generation. Reaching the perpetrators is important, but much more difficult to reach enough of them.

Fibbke · 07/06/2019 15:04

It wasnt taught at our primary.

BertrandRussell · 07/06/2019 15:05

“Because people are too frightened to confront adults about it.“

How do you suggest we do this? I wouldn’t be frightened. Tell me what to do.