FGM on year 5 school curriculum

[MermaidMummy]

I'm really not sure if I'm being unreasonable, so I'm interested in everyone's thoughts.
My 9-year-old's class has just started learning about puberty. We have been told that the next lesson will cover terminology such as erection, sperm and female genital mutilation.
I just don't get why they need to learn about FGM at 9 years old. Some of these kids are very "young" for their age, and mine is very sensitive (won't watch the news in case an "adult topic" crops up).
What is the rationale for teaching this in year 5? There is nobody in the class from a cultural background likely to carry out FGM, but even if there was, would a 9 year-old know that it might happen to them and inform a teacher (if that is the rationale for teaching it)? From what I have read they aren't told anything about it in advance. If it has already happened to them, what is the benefit of bringing it up in class? Couldn't it be damaging and stigmatising?

Would you have an objection to them learning about circumcision?

“Do they learn about gang culture, knife crime, drug abuse etc?”

Year 5 is around the time that kids may start to be allowed to go to the park, school or shops without an adult. There is a high probability of them seeing an older child smoking weed or hear references to gangs and crime if they go to the "wrong" park.

The average 9 year old will be aware that stabbing is a form of murder and will be aware of the concept of a gang through tv/film. They may have even walked past a group of older kids and got a bad vibe. It's a prime time for updating the advice that they had about stranger danger because they might not be with an adult.

It does seem early, but my nine year old came out of the service station loo and asked “ what’s female genital mutilation mummy” she had read the poster.

A quick answer was all that was needed.

Lots of older women were 😮 at her question😂

Can you imagine being taught about beheadings in the Middle East for crimes such as being gay, blasphemy and adultry...Would you expect kuds to go and role play it at break time Porosha?

Personally, there is a disconnect sometimes between kids and what has happened historically, so we flippantly role-played past events. Don't think I'd have made a fun game out of things actually still happening in the world. I also think it is unusual for a 9 year old not to be able to stomach the news.
Why would it be inappropriate to learn that in some countries being gay is still illegal? I remember realising that in Year 7 (through my own research) and being shocked we hadn't heard of this before. I naively thought gay rights were standard. I feel I should have learned that in primary school, Year 5/6 is a reasonable age imo.

Why don't you find out which of your local community centres are used by Somalian refugees and go and talk to them about it.

I worked in a community where FGM was a concern. I’m not sure if it’s the same nationwide but the girls in our area were most at risk during the summer holidays between years 5 & 6, and 6 & 7. Judging by that, year 5 is the ideal time to start talking about it.

Lots of older women were 😮 at her question😂

What older women?

Iris1654
I think it's different if they ask. It's not the same as being taught about it. They'll want to know more than vague details, and all the kids will be talking about it in school.

The ladies in the service station loo.

“Why don't you find out which of your local community centres are used by Somalian refugees and go and talk to them about it.”

Because i’m not an expert and wouldn’t be invited in. It is certainly a subject covered by social workers and other educators in several refugee centres I know about.

“the girls in our area were most at risk during the summer holidays between years 5 & 6, and 6 & 7. Judging by that, year 5 is the ideal time to start talking about it.”

This.

Iris out of interest, what was your quick answer? I can't even begin to think of how I could dilute 'slicing off your clitoris and sewing up your labia' into a quick answer suitable for a 9 year old.

My point is...it’s not a big deal if you just tell them.

The world is a scary place and we should soften the blow by releasing that info slowly.

We can’t wrap them in cotton wool.

Older siblings are essential to the protection of younger siblings. Sadly it’s often the older sister or brother who has been subjected some kind of abuse themselves who informs the authority thus safeguarding their younger siblings.

I can’t remember exactly it was a few years ago,

Something along the lines off. “In some religions, girls vaginas are cut, it’s a bit like circumcision but for girls. It’s painful and unnecessary and illegal here”

She did already know about religious circumcision so that helped.

OP, I think you are sheltering your dd too much. If she is sensitive at the age of 9 which honestly isn't really that young, then maybe you should be supporting her to work on her sensitivities instead of letting her grow up ignorant. Being made aware at FGM at the age is only going help, not harm. This is a serious issue that children should be aware of.

only it's nothing like male circumcision, is it? And not anything to do with religion.

I can't imagine DD taking the idea that a vagina could be cut well.

YES but she was nine.

Is was enough detail and gave her a basic understanding.

only it's nothing like male circumcision, is it?

FGM shouldn't be compared to male circumcision. It is entirely different.

well, I'm not sure giving false information is very helpful, but I'm known for over-explaining and losing my audience.

Did your DD not enquire further about what 'cutting your vagina' entailed? That would be enough for DD to ask a million questions and still be worrying about it at 11 at night.

There is nothing wrong with being sensitive at 9.

I've been away from mumsnet for a bit and honestly, the same old people talking the same utter rubbish. I don't believe 90 percent of the posts here.

There is nothing wrong with being sensitive at 9.

Of course nothing is wrong with it but parents shouldn't really encourage it by sheltering their kids.

The lesson about naming body parts happened when your daughter was in year 1! The sex education and relationships scheme of work builds on the year before a work so they won't skip from naming a vagina to FGM in the quick jumps that you think about it will. The staff are very very aware on how to do this well, they'd have spent ages thinking it through and how to pitch it correctly for the children in your daughters year. I'm a primary teacher, the lesson will be very sensible and non graphic. If you don't want the school teaching it to your child then you must do it! It's important and could help someone in the future.

Of course nothing is wrong with it but parents shouldn't really encourage it by sheltering their kids

Children of primary school age simply don’t need to know this information. They’re not young for very long. They have don’t need to know all the cruelty and misery that goes on in the world at that age - why the rush? I’m not saying children of secondary school age shouldn’t be taught this information when they’re older and more emotionally mature. I still don’t think it’s the best way to tackle the problem, but primary school children are too young.

Of course nothing is wrong with it but parents shouldn't really encourage it by sheltering their kids

Don't be daft. My dd1 wouldnt watch a scary movie at 12, 13, 14. She hated sleepovers and wouldn't go to one until she was 16. She was scared by the news.

She's 19 now and about to do medicine, she's volunteered in hostels and hospitals for the past two years. She's incredibly civic minded, non squeamish and a great person. Still doesn't particularly like horror films!