Email etiquette at work

[damekindness]

When emailing at work to the in-house team I tend to start with Hello {first name} because it sounds open and friendly .

Rarely a Dear {first name} if it's something formal like performance management type things or I'm being passive aggressive

To external people its a Dear until I get to know them and then it seems too formal

The one thing that does set my teeth on edge is when people begin their emails with just the persons first name as in...

Doris,

Further to our meeting this morning,,,

AIBU to think that appears brusque or rude?

If I'm feeling extra annoying and want to say 'do it now' I say 'looking forward to your prompt response' or '...your early response'. I save that for letters of complaint though.

Yup, I'll always read something into someone starting an email saying just my first name. Very informal can start "Hi there", if they like. I dislike people using text speak in email too, even when internal.

We use messenger quite a lot, I've got one colleague (in my satellite office) who will not even say "hi, quick question if you have a minute" or something like that, just barges straight into what they want. Also to people they don't speak to regularly - it would be different if it was someone you'd be speaking to through messenger all through the day.

Personally don't like someone using text speak in messenger either, except the occasional LOL or something. But that's quite common, unfortunately. I tend to go full on proper spelling and punctuation in those cases - with a colleague I message a lot on ongoing projects I tend to get more sloppy with typos and stuff, especially when getting frustrated because the scripts aren't working as expected (and it's usually my fault anyway).

Oh God, I sign off with 'Best' often.
And today I ended an email with 'I hope you have a nice Friday'

I do find just 'Doris' with no 'hello' rather rude though. I know often people are just busy, but when I've been on the receiving end it's always seemed to be in a context where the sender is (unreasonably) annoyed, like when I'm politely querying a late payment or something.

*I dislike "Doris" from colleagues and my immediate manager (in manager's case she always says Hi..) but when I email the Director or AD I get
"Seren,
Approved.
Steve"

Yet "Steve" is friendly and approachable, he's just very busy.*

Totally agree. I work with a couple of senior people who respond like this and I really appreciate it! To the point, no faffing, I get exactly what I need. They are polite and friendly in person, and if they need me to do something (I work in a support role) I get a nicely worded request along the lines of "Freaky, please process this action for this client by the end of the week. Thanks, senior bod"

Using name only isn't universally "just rude".

Some people find it rude, while some others find it perfectly acceptable, as evidenced by this thread. I often have one line email convos with my CEO where neither of us say hello or sign off. So far we've got along just fine.

For those of you who are SO BUSY you find typing "kind regards, me" into emails, why don't you add it to your signature?

I think the most important thing is consistency. I am wary of chopping and changing between formal / informal depending on what I am speaking about because I think it can come across as passive aggressive. For that reason I always use ‘dear...’ and ‘...kind regards’ even when they feel more formal than necessary.

I start with a “Hi Doris” and usually proceed to “Ey up, ducky” once I get to know them.

Can cope with most email twattery, as long as you don’t “reach out” to me. And I’m not a big “Best” fan either.

Good morning/afternoon Fred

Random email

TheCat

Is what I use in professional emails to those I work with. To outsiders Hi name, kind regards.

Not had the chance to throw in a, I hope this is acceptable, dam it

I use Kind Regards unless I know I'm going to possibly piss them off by not being able to do what they have asked so then I use Kindest Regards.

If someone's pissed me off I go straight to Regards.

Regards is such an odd word when you read it over and over...!

I have at least two colleagues who always sign their emails off with 'xxx'!

I think ‘Best Wishes’ is all right for formal and informal, usually.

We have a lady in her late 60's who writes her emails like she would write a letter ( Back in the day when people used pen and paper )
Her emails always make me smile.
Dear WhoWasIt.
I hope that you are well. I am just writing to say...
Yada Yada Yada.
With Best Wishes
From
Doris.
Cracks me up every time.

In my (corporate) world we tend to use:

Hi [First Name]...
Hi All [ when it's direct to a number of people]...

and,

Regards [when being abrupt]
Kind regards [when external or very senior internal]
KR [for speed and when we're already in discussion]

As far as I'm aware no-one has been upset or felt insulted.

The only time 'Dear' is used is when solicitors email us. If we're in football directions or negotiations then I'll use Dear back.

As for smilies, most people tend to put at least a smile on, especially when asking a favour.

Also I find in my organisation and the similar external organisations that I communicate with via e-mail, the more senior the member of staff the far more likely they are to eschew pleaseantries and send

'Doris,

Quick one line message,

Their Name'

Or not even any names and just a quick email if it's internal. Whereas more junior members of staff imo seem more obsessed with making every email look formal I think through worry that they will be seen as rude if they don't. And I say this as one of the most junior members of staff in my org.

I once worked alongside someone who was SO senior and SO focused and so busy she used to put her entire email in the message line.

I'm from a pink and fluffy "naice" profession (the one involving books though I have done many other jobs in my time), and my default setting is to add a greeting and "Kind regards" at the end, but I have worked, and been very uncomfortable, in settings where the emails run along the lines of:

"Cannycat

Throw the old milk out of the fridge before you go home on Friday.

Very important senior person".

I also started off with Dear and Kind regards many years ago, and find it hard to stop being so formal. These days I use Hi when I know the person, and Dear when I don't. I sometimes send a "dear all" email to a group of people.

I sign off Kind regards or Many thanks. Don't like BW.

Exactly this. I use Kind regards if I'm giving people information and Many thanks if I'm asking for some or for them to do something.

We once had an entire team gee-up session about this sort of thing. The take away message was assume positive intent No point in getting upset if Anne writes 'Kind regards' to Bob but only 'Regards' to Chris. So what if Dave didn't say Dear or Hi, he also didn't say fuck off four eyes, did he? And yes Edward has a habit of saying 'thanks so much' but he's American so he's not being sarcastic (that one backfired because Ed used it more especially to be ironic)

It does take the sting out of it a little bit.

I dislike the "Doris" thing. I wouldn't approach someone in person without a greeting, so for the sake of the extra 2 seconds it takes to type "hi" I always do it. Or "dear" if I don't know them.

Then again I've seen some DH work emails, and all used the direct 'Doris' approach. I wonder if it's more of a bloke thing?

I sign off with many thanks or kind regards as standard. Rarely use smileys but I think they have their place.

KR = height of rudeness and arrogance

This is used by a lot of people in my work place including me. Neither rude not arrogant. It's just something used on more informal e-mails and it's just for ease.

But I do agree with you OP, just first names is rude. I tend to use hi/hello or good morning/afternoon followed by a name depending on who it is.

I'm one of the abrupt ones then and use Doris as my intro, without using Kind Regards, Best Regards, Thanks or Many Thanks in my sign off emails to my directors.

I am senior management though and wouldn't use this format to external clients, my team or others.

None of it would bother me. It used to, but after nearly 20 years working in finance, I am pretty immune to a 'Doris' and am also very succinct in my own email style.

I had a head of department once who sent many emails to colleagues all over the department. They all had 'Please' as the sole title. I'd deal with the latest one she'd sent me and then a colleague would copy me into their reply to her, and my inbox would fill up with a long chain of emails all titled 'Please' or 'Re: Please' or 'Fwd: Please'.

Kind regards = genuinely friendly
Regards = passive aggressive

Fuck that. I always put regards. It's not meant in a PA way but if anyone chooses to interpret it that way, that's their issue.

@BuzzShitbagBobbly
'Email Tennis' - made me smile. I know what you mean:
'thank you for saying thank you' and on and on ad infinitum!

Whereas more junior members of staff imo seem more obsessed with making every email look formal
Usually also identifiable because they put their BA (Hons) after their name because they are still so untainted by life that they think it matters

So what if Dave didn't say Dear or Hi, he also didn't say fuck off four eyes, did he?
He might have have written it in in 8pt white text at the bottom though...