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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask someone to stop sniffing

183 replies

PhoneyToney · 04/06/2019 20:32

I was on a tour of a local attraction and one of the guides was sniffing every 10 seconds or so.

I was brought up to consider sniffing as rude and wasn't allowed to do it around my parents.

I found the sniffing to be unpleasant and distracting. I tried to ignore it but couldn't and after 10 minutes or so with no end in sight I asked them to stop. They said they had a medical condition ( I don't remember what ). I didn't say anything further - I didn't know what to say. They reduced the frequency and left soon afterwards.

Was the sniffer BU? WIBU to ask them to stop? What if they just had a cold? What if they had been farting or had tourettes?

OP posts:
kaytee87 · 05/06/2019 07:46

It might be rude to sniff constantly but it's even ruder to make someone feel uncomfortable by saying something to them.
Yabu.

Louiselouie0890 · 05/06/2019 07:48

We're your parents the "kids should be seen not heard" type. How bizarre

DtPeabodysLoosePants · 05/06/2019 07:54

Misophonia sufferer here too. I'd have had to leave the tour. I have hay fever and chronic sinusitis and manage not to sniff all the time. A steroid nose spray and prescription antihistamine should help massively.

CottonSock · 05/06/2019 07:59

A guy in my old workplace used to snort snot every few minutes. May have been a cultural thing (don't shoot me) as I never saw him use a tissue. The whole floor was going slowly insane. I did leave a note on his desk Blush. A diplomatic lady had a chat with him and he went off to Drs to investigate cause. I don't know if he still sniffs / snorts as thankfully I moved jobs! I could not have sat next to him any longer though.

AdoreTheBeach · 05/06/2019 08:00

OP, I too was raised that it’s rude to go around sniffing, particularly when it is a cold and it’s that wet, juicy sniffing. We were told to go get a tissue and blow your nose.

The other week, I was having my nails done and the guy was sniffing back the loud, wet, juicy stuff back in. Of course it’s not going to stop without blowing it out. Not a tic as I’d been there a few times before. I so wanted to as him to please stop and blow his nose, offer a tissue. But as I’m not British, was worried this would seem rude, so stayed quiet, silently cringing inside. I decided during this time, I wasn’t going back.

As an aside, my DH has sinus problems. Has had for years and has had no less than four surgeries (septum repaired and polyps removed), but he carries hankies and blows his nose, never does the sniffing as he knows it has to come out. Much prefer nose blowing to wet, juicy sniffing any day.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 05/06/2019 08:01

How horrible of you. Do upload a photo of yourself so we can decide whether there is anything about you that is offensively unattractive and needs pointing out.

Someone9 · 05/06/2019 08:01

I have terrible sinus issues and allergies. They have alleviated since I moved to a warmer country but I was often that person who had to sniff very frequently. Blowing my nose made no difference it was CONSTANTLY running. It was very embarrassing and I was acutely aware of how annoying it was to listen to, I worked in a very quiet office and would cringe sometimes thinking about how my colleagues probably wanted to kill me! I would have been mortified and very upset if someone abruptly told me to stop.

Have a bit of empathy OP.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 05/06/2019 08:54

What an utterly horrible thing to do.

Post nasal drip affects many people with what can be very serious illnesses. They cannot help it, tissues work for 2 minutes and then it is back. They have probably also vomited this morning due to mucus build up in their stomach, which makes sniffing and blowing painful for the rest of the day.

That is what it is like to suffer this, and some of you are upset to witness a person sniffing?
Get some compassion and stop telling disabled people they are disgusting for something they can't help.

Marinkazurie · 05/06/2019 08:57

I actually hate hearing people blow their noses and would rather they just sniffed. No idea why it's thought of as rude

DtPeabodysLoosePants · 05/06/2019 09:04

Sniffing is a disability?! I've heard it all now and find that comment very offensive as will those with actual disabilities.

Damntheman · 05/06/2019 09:13

Do you not consider Tourettes a disability Peabody?

DtPeabodysLoosePants · 05/06/2019 09:16

Coffee was talking about post nasal drip, not Tourette's.

Marinkazurie · 05/06/2019 09:19

Sniffing is a disability?!

No but it can be the result of a hidden disability.

UmpetyLumpety · 05/06/2019 09:19

So, your parents taught you that sniffing is rude, but didn't teach you that doing something like telling a stranger off for sniffing is much ruder..? Goodness gracious. YABVVVVVVVVVU.

Some cultures think blowing your nose is rude. Hopefully if you are ever in their company in public and you blow your nose, some random stranger will pull you up on it! Then you'll no doubt be back on MN whinging that someone was rude to you...!

DtPeabodysLoosePants · 05/06/2019 09:20

Sniffing is often a habit. My exH was forever doing it.
Post nasal drip causes coughing because the mucous drips down the back of the throat rather than the nose. I've never known vomiting cause sniffing to be painful either Hmm

NauseousMum · 05/06/2019 09:21

I have rhinitis so every time i breath it sounds sniffy. Blowing my nose does nothing except make me sneeze many times.

If someone asked me i would tell them the same and then, in embarrassment, try holding my breath then leave. People have offered me tissues which i was grateful to accept for a sneezing fit.

Sniffing obviously doesn't bother me in others anymore though i hate it in me. Coughing and spitting on the floor i dislike though.

EL8888 · 05/06/2019 09:27

I think it’s gross. My way of approaching it is to offer them a tissue in a accusatory way. I have sinus issues, hay fever and get lots of colds but manage not to sniff. So confused why other people need to sniff. Laziness and habit l suppose

EL8888 · 05/06/2019 09:32

@DtPeabodysLoosePants sniffing is a disability 😂😂. I suppose picking your nose, farting etc are as well then

Likethebattle · 05/06/2019 09:32

People blowing their noses makes me heave. There is nothing wrong with sniffing, sorting is worse. If I blow my nose it still runs so what’s the point?

DtPeabodysLoosePants · 05/06/2019 09:38

@EL8888 I know, they must be hey? Best not complain about anyone's disgusting habits in case they are disabilities Confused my exH picked his nose a lot too and rearranged his genitals frequently in public and with his hands down his actual underwear. Obviously I should have had understanding for his disabilities Grin

BambooB · 05/06/2019 09:40

Youre a dick

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 05/06/2019 09:46

I am disabled, I have a neurological illness and post nasal drip as a result of damage to my brain and nose. I can't smell or taste very well, and my nose runs nearly constantly.
I vomit about 3 mornings a week and the acid has caused my throat to be permanently raw and aching, I also sneeze in uncontrollable fits.

There are a lot of ignorant and disabilist comments in this thread. You dont get to decide if someone sniffing repeatedly is a medical problem, their consultant will do that.

What you can do is not shame disabled people in public just for being ill. It is definitely going to show every one how ignorant you are.

MustBeDreaming · 05/06/2019 09:48

I have a sniffly family member. No amount of nose blowing stops it as it's caused by medical issues and the doctors haven't been able to help. He gets bad nosebleeds and a very sore nose if he tries to keep on top of it by wiping or blowing. It makes him very upset on occasion because it's so common for people to assume he's ill and avoid him or give him filthy looks and comments.

LazyLemur · 05/06/2019 10:06

Oh for goodness sake. Sniffing isn't rude. It isn't something people choose to do or are too "lazy" to stop doing. If you have a post nasal drip like Coffee was discussing, blowing will make it worse.

Post nasal drip is horrible. If you don't sniff, it will build up and give you bad breath and a sore throat, and is generally uncomfortable. Yes it's dripping down, but sometimes it's thick and stringy. Sorry that might be too much for the people who can't cope with sniffing, but it's true. If you do sniff, you'll get a bad acidy stomach, gas and diarrhoea.

This week, I have hayfever and a cold on top of my usual post nasal drip so as well as having to sniff more, I'm also having to blow it out (which is even more disgusting tbh) and if you think that's lazy, you should see how lazy I am when antihistamines knock me out for a day because I have a bad reaction to all of them. So because I can't take antihistamines I have to take steroids which make my cold and bad stomach worse.

I'm in a real snotty grump right now, and if someone offered me a tissue in an "accusatory tone", they'd be getting the serious judgy side eye and a grilling as to why they think I'd need one. I am fucking uncomfortable and I sure as hell am not going to stop sniffing because some dimwit raised their child to believe that sniffing is rude. Pushing in at queues, spitting on the floor, walking down the street blaring your shit music, harrassing strangers in public about things they can't help is rude. Things you can choose not to do.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 05/06/2019 10:11

Bugger, this is one of those fake goady threads isn't it? Totally reeled in Blush

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