If you put kids to bed at 6pm ...

[ichifanny]

Just out of interest , I keep hearing parents talking about kids getting up at 4am - 5am I have 4 including a baby and apart from the newborn stage it’s never happened to any of mine unless they are ill or otherwise disrupted . Is it not just the case that if you put your kids to bed at 6-7pm then it makes sense they will be up with the larks ? Does it happen often that kids who go to bed about 8.30pm -9pm still get up early ?

"I do at the moment Sockwomble she’s a baby which comes with the territory ."

Imagine that she is still doing it in 14 years time and you might have an idea why people get pissed off with the smugness.

I've actually said a couple times on here exactly that too sparklefarts ! Guess they just ignore those posts?

Sometimes it doesn't make a difference but I knew some parents who put their DCs to bed at 6 and they were up at 5 and they were complaining. If I put my dd to bed at 6, she'd think it was a nap and be up at 7.30! My DCs have always gone to bed about 7.30/8.30 and been up around 7 which is manageable for me. My dd was up at 6 this morning (13 mths) but at least she slept through the night so I didn't mind.

My older DCs are supposed to go to bed at 9 on school nights. I allow them to stay up later on weekends and holidays as long as they're quiet. They're 12 and 10 and haven't surfaced yet! If I didn't have a one year old I'd get a lie in .

lol I love all those oh so wise parents. Doesn't matter what the issue is picky eating/sleeping trouble/late talkers/reluctant readers. They think because their kids managed fairly easily or with some straight forward help that they must be genius parents who have all the answers.

My kids never got up early by the way but that was just their natural sleep cycle. My friend had a kid who would always be fast asleep by 7:30pm and up at 5:00am. The other option was you kept him awake till 8:30am and when he got up at 5:00am the next day he's be cranky and irritated all day long.

Nope! My two are in bed at 6:00pm. They wake at 7:30am. It’s just their natural body clock. The baby didn’t wake up until 10:15 today!!

Ex H worked a late shift where he started at one in the afternoon and came home at nine. It suited us to arrange our life around that so we did. Ds went to bed at ten and went at the same time or shortly after, and got up at around nine/ten with a two hour nap during the day. It worked really well for us. HV did a SIOB at it and every time we went questioned us about our strange sleep arrangements and tried to give advice on bringing it forward to a more suitable 7 am. Friends were jealous because we got a "lie in" every day. I always said adjust your time table then and you'll get a "lie in" every day too! They never did though. My SIL followed the same schedule as us and was as happy with it as we were.

I do think the expected early evening bed time has a lot to answer for.

My DD has always been an early riser, we read the same sort of advice to put them to bed later for a later morning wake up. Persevered through 3 weeks of hell, trying to keep her awake till 7.30pm, hoping it would result in a 6.30am + wake up time.

She was still up by 5.30am every day and was miserable and over tired.

Now she's 5, she's knackered by 6pm so goes to bed at 6.30pm and is up by 5.30am.

It's not particularly convenient as it means we have to pick her up at 5 from after school then have only 1 and a half hours to spend time with her and get everything done before bed. But it's how her body clock works and it won't last forever so we make do.

Doesn't matter what the issue is picky eating/sleeping trouble/late talkers/reluctant readers. They think because their kids managed fairly easily or with some straight forward help that they must be genius parents who have all the answers.

This is so true. Even I believed it a teeny bit. I thought it was my parenting for a lot of the things that went right, but a lot of it was my child. DS2 helped me realise I shouldn't congratulate myself. On anything

(all mine are actually night owls and will generally sleep the 11-12 hours whenever they go to bed) but I do understand parents who have to have stricter bedtimes because of early wakings.

At no point have I ever said I am a genius parent with all the answers we have many issues that aren’t sleep like food issues etc , I was simply asking a sensible question and a few people have given me sensible answers and added something to the discussion . Others seem to see some sort of malice or smugness in it .

I’d say overall people who CONSISTENTLY put kids to bed late have longer lie ins in the morning , people can argue this all they like but it makes basic sense . Like the poster above who adapted bedtime later to suit the family . There’s exceptions for behavioural issues or learning disabilities obviously , but it makes basic sense .

people who CONSISTENTLY put kids to bed late have longer lie ins in the morning

To a point, of course. But we also have our own internal rhythms, just like teenagers are more likely to sleep late and old people to rise early.

When we moved my eldest's bedtime up from 9pm to 7pm, he only woke one hour earlier - an hour extra sleep was worth a lot.

My oldest never went to sleep before around 11.00 as a pre- schooler and around 9.30/10.00 once she started school. There was no point in putting her to bed earlier as she would just be awake bored. She would still get up around 6.30. She is now 17 and is still a night owl but up at 7.00 for school and 6.30 on a weekend for paper round. It's just her. She never struggled at school and did really well in her gcses. Just seems to need little sleep.
The youngest would tell me at around 7.30 from being quite young that it was time for bed, she still goes to bed at a decent time and gets up at 6.00 on school days and around 8.00 on a weekend.
Kids are individuals.

@ichifanny

So what you are saying is....my daughter sleeping better because she goes to bed earlier (and we have tried consistently doing it later)....doesn't make sense to you so just can't be true?

I know my mother said when I was younger it didn't matter what time she put me to bed I'd wake up at 5am

If I went to bed at 6pm I'd sleep 11hours, if she put me to bed at 10pm I'd sleep 7

Mine it varies - but youngest is always up at about 6am
Thought he'd sleep in Thursday as we were out of the house from 4am till 11pm on the Wednesday - no, still up at 6am

My son used to sleep for hours, woulld have slept until 10 am if I let him. I didn't let him as I was a very young mum and wanted to spend the day out having fun with him.
Now he's 36 and still sleeps all hours given half a chance.
I used to have trouble getting him up for school even though he went to bed at a reasonable time. Never one for getting up at 4am my ds.

All 4 of mine take after me and love their sleep, if left none of them would wake up naturally much before 9 even the youngest at 2 who goes to bed between 7/7.30. On holiday we have to set an alarm as we couldn't rely on the children to wake us up on time for breakfast

I’d say overall people who CONSISTENTLY put kids to bed late have longer lie ins in the morning , people can argue this all they like but it makes basic sense

You really are refusing to listen to any of us that have actual experience of this aren't you?!?
Instead you carry on with your 'I just know best routine'

Basically OP, you're being a judgy arsehole refusing to listen. You do no know best. Children, like adults, are all different.

To sum up, fuck off, wise up and stop being so smug and judgy.

Bike fail. First paragraph in above post from me was meant to be bolder as is a quote. I clearly do not agree with that stupidity

Bold not bike!

If I leave my three year old up till nine, when is my 8 year old and 12 year old meant to go to bed?

And also fuck off. By nine I’ve had enough of parenting. All mine are in bed. And I get to be me for a while
Hour before I too fall asleep

I’d say overall people who CONSISTENTLY put kids to bed late have longer lie ins in the morning , people can argue this all they like but it makes basic sense

Yes, all the people who’ve explained why that just doesn’t work for their child are obviously just not being consistent enough in all the months and months that they’ve tried it for and should just listen to you...

Not sure why people are wishing no sleep on me to teach me a lesson

Because generally people like yourself just refuse to get it until they actually get a child that doesn’t sleep. Yours do sleep and that’s great, telling people who have tried everything for long periods of time that they just need to be consistent or whatever is just the same as people telling folks with kids with real food issues to “just give them it as they won’t starve themselves” - it’s bollocks.

There’s a huge difference between a child who could adapt if in a routine and a child who simply can’t sleep later in the morning.

Bed at 6, up at 530
Bed at 630, up at 530
Bed at 7, up at 530

I think you see where this going 😂